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to want to tell a shop where to go!

(87 Posts)
Dawndonna Sat 29-Jun-13 20:22:41

Friend of a friend takes a dress into the changing rooms.
Assistant says to friend that there is no point in her trying on said dress as you had to be slim and confident to wear it, and the person trying on the dress was not.
WTAF! How dare she! Not the sort of place for those with low self esteem.

Nerfmother Sun 30-Jun-13 18:06:57

Or don't post a link if you think

Nerfmother Sun 30-Jun-13 18:06:27

Not saying its right, just an occupational hazard. And you can't expect people to ask your permission. Under another name I was cautioning a bit of restraint on Rivens thread, but lost in the enthusiasm. Just, don't post a limo to your real life if you honk it would matter to have the two joined up.

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 18:00:04

I think all the posters that do the rl thing are wrong to stick their oar in without asking.

And yes, I have been here a long time.

Nerfmother Sun 30-Jun-13 17:53:33

Oh god anyone who's been on mumsnet any length of time should know that you run the risk of posters trying to merge real life and what you post. Anyone remember Riven? And the massively unhelpful roller coaster of people tweeting, contacting journos etc? All before being asked personally. Baby Botd or something claiming to be in hospital with a baby - poster rang the hospital confused . Some hotel thread where the hotel came on and offered huge apologies for some credit card mix up? If the op hadn't posted the link, the poster couldn't have emailed.

hobnobsaremyfave Sun 30-Jun-13 17:16:06

I did wonder if it would be deleted.

Ashoething Sun 30-Jun-13 17:13:13

Really the police would be interested in one womens comments to another in a clothes shophmm really?

At worst it could be seen as libellous if the shop refutes what happened but even then would be a civil matter. Hardly something for the poster to lose sleep over?

Mnhq haven't deleted the thread at op's request either which makes me even morehmm

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 17:12:49

Well emailing the shop sat badly with me.

WhereYouLeftIt Sun 30-Jun-13 17:09:26

"Bloody hell, people slag off shops all the time on here."
Yes they do. Big shops, multinational-type shops like B&Q or Parcelforce who our slagging can't damage. Not small independent retailers who could be seriously harmed by a slagging. Which came via a friend-of-a-friend (a.k.a hearsay).

IMO there's really not a lot of difference between an independent retailer and an individual person. That business is like an extension of that person, with their family's financial security dependant on it. Endangering that should not be done lightly.

There MNer who emailed the business did so openly; informing the thread that she had done so. IMO she was in the right, I found the 'naming & shaming' sat badly with me. I also find the OP's over-reaction to the shop being emailed confusing. Why would the shop knowing about this thread affect the OP in the slightest? Why lose sleep over it? Sorry, but that smacked to me of being happy to say something behind a person's back that you weren't willing to say to their face. And that also sits badly with me.

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 17:03:23

So, some shops are fair game and some are not confused

SodaStreamy Sun 30-Jun-13 17:00:31

Maybe she's upset Ashoething?

We have all heard about police becoming involved in internet posts on social meida sites so, as she said she is dealing with other RL issues at present and may well feel vulerenable now.

OP you haven't said anything that asked for comments on how your friend was treated and that is nothing to worry about.

Perhaps the company will reply, maybe they won't but either way you haven't done anything wrong if you are simply recounting details accurately

The pack mentailty of some posters to belittle others and score points beggars belief at times, and the double standards

landofsoapandglory Sun 30-Jun-13 16:56:26

I'm on the fence. Had the shop have googled their name before it was deleted then this thread would have shown up. It is a lesson to everyone, and has been said time and time again, once it is posted it is out there for all to see!

hobnobsaremyfave Sun 30-Jun-13 16:53:30

It is a salutory tale though, once you post something on the internet you have zero control over what people may do with that. I think it would do us all good to remember that.

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 16:51:07

Bloody hell, people slag off shops all the time on here.

I'm not sure why anyone thought this shop deserved a warning.

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 16:49:19

I would have got arsey too, if posters didn't like the naming they should have said on thread.

Not sent a sneaky email first.

Ashoething Sun 30-Jun-13 16:44:19

No hand wringing here usual. They haven't deleted the name of the shop from our memories though have they?hmm I still fail to see why the op got so arsey about it?

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 16:41:19

Name of shop has been deleted though, so you can all stop wringing your hands.

Ashoething Sun 30-Jun-13 16:39:43

Thread.damn phone.

Ashoething Sun 30-Jun-13 16:39:06

So I see this threae is still here...

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Sun 30-Jun-13 16:36:18

The person who emailed the shop did no wrong. This is a public internet forum. And it is unfair to try and ruin someone's business behind their back.

The OP had no reason to post the name other than to try and damage the shops business. Why on earth would it not be reasonable to warn the shop.

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 16:32:28

Someone sneaking behind OPS back doesn't sit well with me,either.

Posters could have raised their concerns on the thread imo.

insancerre Sun 30-Jun-13 16:28:21

I am all for naming and shaming when the need arises
this thread doesn't sit well with me
a friend of a friend?

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 16:22:04

Posters name and shame on MN all the time.

I've never known anyone email the shop before though.

If she hadn't named the shop,the thread thread would have been full of 'name and shame' posts

insancerre Sun 30-Jun-13 16:15:31

it was a pretty low thing of the op to do in the first place though
to name the shop
it's not as if it happened to the op, anyway
I think the shop have every right to know about this thread
it could damage their business
and for what?
a second-hand story

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 16:07:10

I think it's bloody stupid that someone took it upon themselves to email the shop on OPS behalf.

Why the hell would you do that?

usualsuspect Sun 30-Jun-13 16:03:13

Someone emailed the shop?To tell them about this thread?
Bloody hell, I can see why Dawndonna is pissed off.

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