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Is it right to make a woman feel unclean?

(410 Posts)
camel1 Sat 29-Jun-13 09:08:25

I was saying 'thank you' to a male colleague and touched his upper arm as a reinforcement of that thanks. He recoiled in disgust, his body language, his facial expression and his yelp surprised me so much that I apologised profusely. The incident happened in front of many children, as I am a teacher at a school. And within a minute he had shook hands with a male colleague. Whether it was his intention or not, I felt that he felt I was unclean. I was/am greatly upset by this. I understand that his cultural or religious beliefs does not permit him to touch women, or vice versa. However, I have lived in many different countries and cultures, and I adhered to their cultural rules and would never have reacted in such an offensive way. What do you think?

yamsareyammy Sun 30-Jun-13 17:52:55

It isnt as simple as saying that it is intention that matters.
The op knew how the man was about being touched. But she touched him anyway. So what was her intention?

larrygrylls Sun 30-Jun-13 17:57:14

She didn't. Read the thread.

yamsareyammy Sun 30-Jun-13 18:04:14

Have you read the op?

merrymouse Sun 30-Jun-13 19:12:14

Has anybody considered that they might have been standing on nylon carpet and perhaps the OP gave her colleague an electric shock???

Moominsarehippos Sun 30-Jun-13 19:34:42

He did yelp. I have never made a grown man yelp!

I don't think we know where the OP is. If she's in the UK Mr Yelp would know full well that culturally, touching an arm is ok. I wonder what the kids thought.

If she's in somewhere like Saudi, ok not such a good idea but it's the other side of the coin for those saying 'give his culture a break'.

Electric shock theory is funny though! Unless she crept up behind him and jumped on him. That's the only thing that makes DS yelp.

defuse Sun 30-Jun-13 23:37:36

Love the electric shock theory. grin

DioneTheDiabolist Sun 30-Jun-13 23:50:48

It's always sad when people dress up bigotry as feminism.sad

Onesleeptillwembley Mon 01-Jul-13 01:34:15

Even sadder when they attach it to a fairy in the sky.

Crumbledwalnuts Mon 01-Jul-13 07:09:30

Plain wrong to defend bigotry with religion. Any woman should be embarrassed and ashamed to do so.

Moominsarehippos Mon 01-Jul-13 11:38:46

Especially religions that profess to treat women equally (which does imply that they are 'other') all brother/sisterhood etc.

Jesus touched lepers and prostitutes!

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