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To ask how on EARTH you wipe with such a small number of sheets of loo roll?

(159 Posts)
AmyFarrahFowlerCooper Fri 28-Jun-13 21:34:27

I see this every so often on here (the SIL thread is the one I'm thinking of atm) where people use 8 sheets of loo roll for a wee. How?! How does that work? Do you just wipe once with all 8 squares or use a sheet for a 8 little wipes? Don't you get wee on your hands?

This is a genuine question because I use a million rolls <slight exaggeration> a week and I'm dumbfounded every time I see a post about a family of four using a quarter of what I use for a week.

BoysAreLikeDogs Mon 08-Jul-13 06:01:15

Family cloth is boggling

Is it for all the family?

Mamagiraffe Mon 08-Jul-13 03:36:49

I use family cloth.. Wash and reuse, just like ds'j reusable baby wipes x

AKissIsNotAContract Thu 04-Jul-13 03:58:28

I always use 2 sheets for a wee and 4 for a poo. Always folded, never deviate from this.

I had an unfortunate incident with a bumhose on holiday. I thought I could use it to clean out my mooncup. It was a pretty forceful waterjet and sent period splattering all up the walls and even on the ceiling.

tanukiton Thu 04-Jul-13 03:33:22

And it has a dryer so your undercarriage gets wafted dry so technically you would never need loo roll again....

tanukiton Thu 04-Jul-13 03:28:02

For all your rear end cleansing needs smile
Mine has adjustable temp and jet control.

BadLad Thu 04-Jul-13 02:04:13

How do blind people know when they have finished wiping?

WafflyVersatile Wed 03-Jul-13 21:30:49

surely if you use loads of sheets there's a point where it get's like trying to paint coving with a standard paint roller?

shewhowines Wed 03-Jul-13 18:29:48

Thought about this thread this morning when doing the business. I thought I used 2 or 3 sheets for a wee. I can officially verify from this morning, that it is exactly 3 folded roughly along the creases then all folded in half again - so a 6 sheet thickness for the price of 3!

I thought I used loads for a longer job but at three sheets a go' and about 10 to 12 wipes, i'm still well under your 50 sheets for a wee. I'm envy at the 2 wipe per poo brigade. Your digestive system must be better than mine.

Osmiornica Wed 03-Jul-13 18:13:28

Blimey. You do realise you're meant to stop weeing before you wipe. Can't see why else you'd need 50.

LillethTheCat Mon 01-Jul-13 16:11:52

Im with the OP. 2 sheets folded leaves hardly any room. I know (well hope) we all wash our hands afterwards so its not really a big deal if people use less than others, but I really dont see how its done with so few pieces. I dont count the number of pieces I use, but I would say its at least 5

theodorakisses Mon 01-Jul-13 16:04:11

Sorry but I do have a maid but I do my own laundry and if you squirt properly they are simply used for drying.

theodorakisses Mon 01-Jul-13 16:01:29

The bum squirted is ok for 3 goes but after that, at 44c is a bit warm. My oh has taught me that when you are constipated and desperate, a few squirts with the hose means you can then pass the log, gross, tmi but effective

PunkHedgehog Mon 01-Jul-13 14:41:27

Ah, I see.

Well, I don't see, but at least I have some idea of what you're talking about.

How any of you still have a working flush is beyond me.

BergholtStuttleyJohnson Mon 01-Jul-13 14:32:59

How the hell can you use 50 sheets for a wee? Do you piss into the tissue? I don't even use that much for a shit and I'm very clean of arse. 2 sheets is sufficient for a piss, I don't get piss on my hands but if I did I'd just wash them like I do anyway.

MrsPennyapple Mon 01-Jul-13 14:31:49

Splash barrier: A bundle of loo roll that you put down before you poo, so as to avoid splash-back and also minimise sound effects.

PunkHedgehog Mon 01-Jul-13 14:01:23

Splash barrier?

Er. Where and how is this constructed?

valiumredhead Mon 01-Jul-13 13:47:51

Garlic-it's called 'shataff' in the descriptiongrin I so want one !

valiumredhead Mon 01-Jul-13 13:43:29

I use whatever I need, counting is very funnygrin

I want a bidet or bum squirter !

shewhowines Mon 01-Jul-13 13:26:30

2-3 here but it has to be good quality. I would over compensate with cheap stuff.

One or two wipes per poo though. Piles put paid to that. blush

mirry2 Mon 01-Jul-13 13:11:09

Yes the linen towels sound dreadful. Who washes them? Do people have maids to do it?

JackieTheFart Mon 01-Jul-13 13:07:23

Well I'm a scruncher, I don't count pages, and I use bloody loads for a poo!

I don't put a splash barrier down, who does that??!

Poppetspinkpants Mon 01-Jul-13 13:00:42

I'm torn between <boke> at the linen towels by the toilet and shoulder shaking giggles coupled with Mutley sniggers at the other descriptions.

Even worse, I'm at work and my colleagues are giving me funny looks.

cantspel Mon 01-Jul-13 01:20:17

No you dont get poo on them as the arm folds to the side of the loo and you pull the lever to move the arm after you have finished pooing.
Not even my kids manage to poo on the water pipe and if anyone could then it would be them.

garlicnutty Mon 01-Jul-13 01:06:56

Ooh, look! A thermostatic one for Brits (and better designed) smile

garlicnutty Mon 01-Jul-13 00:52:46

That GoBidet looks a bit like the Geberit bum-squirting loo that's being advertised atm. I couldn't be happy with something like that - wouldn't the squirty tubes be liable to get poo on them? Then you'd be squirting your nethers with poo water [boak]

There's no reason you couldn't plumb a bum-hose (grin) into hot & cold. In fact, I've just realised that a longer hose for my shower mixer would do just fine! (Tiny bathroom.) That should give visitors something to talk about behind my back ...

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