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To wonder why people do this because it disturbs me?

(109 Posts)
Gossipmonster Sun 23-Jun-13 23:47:18

On holiday in Portugal there was a family with three gorgeous boys ages approx 12 - 7.

Dressed identically for the entire week.

Why do people do this? Does it not stifle the children creating their own identity?

More importantly what happens when soneone spills something/needs to change?

Does everyone then have to change? confused

ArbitraryUsername Tue 25-Jun-13 08:21:50

To be honest, I don't really care how other people dress their children.

I don't dress mine the same (they're 13 and 3; can you imagine the embarrassment of being dressed to match your 3 year old brother as a teen?) and I hated it as a child (and not just for the itchy seams problem). I remember on truly awful outfit of brightly coloured polka dot (very short) shorts with a matching vest top, both made out of some awful scratchy synthetic fabric (with absolutely no stretch in it) and no lining anywhere to stop the rough seams irritating me. I vividly remember crying at being forced to wear it (at about 4) because it was ugly, uncomfortable and was the same as my sister had to wear.

TheEarlOf Mon 24-Jun-13 18:01:55

I'm surprised so many people hate it!
My sister and I used to love it and try and dress as similar as possible. We still do it now and obviously would never wear matchy matchy but we're in our 20s...

I also love it when I get to wear the same outfit as other people like as bridesmaids (I think I must just have v unusual!)

StinkyElfCheese Mon 24-Jun-13 17:57:37

When we did a big family holiday all kids under 10 (there were 10) wore a red fleece ...very easy to scan count them all smile

jacks365 Mon 24-Jun-13 17:51:29

I'm going for a trip with our local children's centre with 2 of my dd, I wonder if I should put them in matching outfits for ease of spotting. It'll have to be gap hoodies and jeans as not many matching outfits for a 17 yo and a 20 month old. In our house the older 3 basically share clothes they've found it gives them more options of what to wear, they have over the years had similar outfits ie same dress shape, different colour but never have matched totally.

mrsjay Mon 24-Jun-13 17:41:45

the DDS wore the same hoody the other day after a shouting match and mum tell her 1 of them huffed and changed grin

mrsjay Mon 24-Jun-13 17:40:47

maybe mum nips into the shops in her lunch break and says yep i will have 3 of this that and the other and didnt have time to browse seems a bit strange though nowt queer as folk but the 12 yr old must feel weird wearing the same as a 7yr old though

SkinnybitchWannabe Mon 24-Jun-13 17:23:11

Theres no way Id dress my 3 ds the same. To be honest they would refuse to leave the house!
I hate seeing twins dressed the same as well.
But I can see the benefits of dressing them the same to go to theme parks etc for safety in crowds I wouldn't take family pictures though I hadn't thought of that.

Oh and there is plenty of choice in 'budget shops'. So thats not an excuse

Gossipmonster Mon 24-Jun-13 17:14:12

Interesting that it might be a cultural thing - but it still disturbed me.

They also had the same haircut.

I didn't see their dad - but tbh if he had been dressed the same at the three sons I am not sure I would've been able to contain myself!!! grin.

LifeSavedbyLego Mon 24-Jun-13 15:31:29

Cripes freaky. Ds1 and 2 are often dressed similarly in that there is only so different you get make stripy polo shirt and jeans/shorts look.

My grandmother used to try and dress db and I the same. My mother relented once and bought us matching track suits and trainers. grin. Not entirely sure that's what my grandma had it mind. She never asked again.

FacebookAnonymous Mon 24-Jun-13 15:13:51

Very very disturbing. I mean, at SOME schools, they make all the children dress identically 5 days a week. Lifetime of issues those poor kids will have sad

busyboysmum Mon 24-Jun-13 15:10:22

I do have a set of matching t shirts for mine, they say thing 1 thing 2 and thing 3 on (from Cat in the Hat) they are bright red and do make it easier to locate the kids when they wear them. However does sound a bit ott on this occasion, v organised parents!

HappyAsEyeAm Mon 24-Jun-13 13:11:27

Not identical, no.

But often I will put my two DSs in the same colour, say red, and ask DH to wear his red-tshirt today and I will maybe wear something red too, so then I know I have a full reds wash. Rather than a reds, a lights and a darks and a whites all out of one day's clothing.

Manchesterhistorygirl Mon 24-Jun-13 13:10:19

Eldest ds likes to match ds2, but to get around it I've bought them matching pj's. wink

Arkady Mon 24-Jun-13 13:06:28

DMil did this to her 3 sons, including to school throughout primary as there was no uniform. The clothes were homemade as she didn't approve of fashionable clothing (not just to save money or because she liked making them).
They also had matching massive bowlcuts until they were 12 and permitted not to have the approved child haircut any more.
DH is still bitter about being taken for particularly square triplets throughout his childhood.
DBil still shudders about wearing the same outfit for 5 years straight.

MrsMelons Mon 24-Jun-13 13:02:30

My boys definitely DO choose to. There would be endless arguements if not, sometimes they will choose exactly the same outfit but in different colours.

MrsMelons Mon 24-Jun-13 13:00:14

My two boys want to have the same tshirts etc, they like the same characters etc so they often wear the same. I really couldn't care less what other people think anyway but I would usually put them in the same brightly coloured t-shirt when at theme parks etc.

Obviously it is accidental that their shorts and trainers may match also grin

DizzyZebra Mon 24-Jun-13 12:53:03

Holiday - sensible idea.

All the time - weird.

RetroRita Mon 24-Jun-13 12:45:40

I think there are lot of people on this thread who are the missing point that the children chose it themselves a lot of times.

My 5yo would always chose the same as her 2yo sister given the chance.

Also, who are you people that change a child's outfit when it becomes dirty? Do you walk around carrying a wardrobe of spare clothes? I think its much stranger to feel you have to change your child if they drop a bit of food down themselves than to drop them in matching outfits. I do a quick wash with a baby wipe to get off what I can and that's it.

Once they are over the nappy/potty training stage who carries spare clothes around? confused

DeWe Mon 24-Jun-13 11:03:12

My dd1 and dd2 used to frequently decide they were wearing the same. They did this up to about a year ago. Now dd1's at secondary and is too grown up for that usually. I never did it deliberately, but it was their choice.

5madthings Mon 24-Jun-13 09:32:06

I hate this! My mum did it to me and my sister sometimes and i hated it and swore i would never do it.

With four boys it would look odd, and the elder ones would have a fit if i tried it.

I can see the merit in matching hats or tops uf out somewhere busy i guesd.

But all matching and all the time nope.

One of the mums in my ante-natal.class had twin girls who were always matching and if one got dirty she changed both...why just why?

I actually think it would look quite funny if i dressed my four boys the same and then put dd in a co-ordinating outfit but just no, far too much like hard work. they dont have clothes the same anyway, my mil did used to buy them matching stuff and i told her i didnt like it, she still.buys matching socks annoying when pairing up socks and you have the same socks in a bunch of sizes!

flipchart Mon 24-Jun-13 09:27:52

There are 5 years difference between me and one of my sisters and 18 months between her and the youngest sister.
My mum had us dress the same.

My youngest sister Cindy, didn't mind but there again she would have been 6 and I was nearly 13. I HATED it and have still not forgiven my mum!

mumandboys123 Mon 24-Jun-13 09:26:34

I have three children aged 9, 6 and 3. They quite like having the same thing. There is also an element of buy one, buy everyone...and sometimes it's easier to do that the same. I try to buy the same 'theme' (so we all had angry birds t-shirts the last time I went into Asda but they were three different designs) but sometimes it's the same thing. It is not done to upset anyone or be 'offensive'. I find it 'offensive' that my children's clothing choices might be judged by strangers....

ArbitraryUsername Mon 24-Jun-13 09:18:36

My mum did this to my sister and I. Worse still, it was always hideous clothes that my grandmother had made for us, which were always made from nasty uncomfortable material with no lining anywhere so the seams were always scratchy and horrible.

Scarred me for life, it did.

expatinscotland Mon 24-Jun-13 09:18:07

PICK put matching tops on mine for our journeys abroad to keep a better eye on them.

IsItMyArseOrMyElbow Mon 24-Jun-13 09:16:01

As a younger child of 2 I would like to appeal to people to not do this. My grandmother would insist on buying me and my sister matching clothes. Due to my mother's enthusiastic recycling of clothing, this resulted in me wearing the same goddam dress for what seemed like an eternity (4 year age gap, so we would be matching for a year, then a gap of a couple of years until the larger sized fitted me).

My friend does this with her sons, cute but a little disturbing. Fortunately she's not the type to be doing hand-me-downs. (Won't have a penny as long as she's got a hole in her bum).

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