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to have found myself saying "will you please stop touching my shopping?"

(116 Posts)
ICBINEG Sat 22-Jun-13 13:39:55

Okay so ordinarily I would imagine anyone saying that to be a card carrying nutto control freak....but...

I have tried...I really make peace with the "can I help you with your packing" charity collecting gang that seem to be perpetually staking out the end of the tills in my local super market. I have tried to not feel imposed upon that I have to defend my right to pack my own bloody shopping while being made to feel guilty about it....

I have a system when packing...designed to get through the hairy bit before my toddler time bomb detonates as rapidly as possible. It is fast, it is efficient and it is my fucking shopping anyway (I digress).

So I have learnt to say, oh so very politely, that "no, I would not like any help with my packing". Which is exactly what I said today.

Normally this results in the charity packer moving out of the way, or even going to a different till end to help out there for a while...but not today.

Today's charity packing woman is determined to "own the space" at the end of the conveyor so that I cannot actually park my trolley there know...packing my stuff into it.

So I take the first two items and slot them into their assigned bags. When I look up she holding my quiche (well this is an MN story after all). She is looking at the bags like "which one does this go in", I look at her like "you don't know because it's MY fucking system" and hold out my hand for the quiche and file it correctly. The 4th and 5th items go in fine...but then one of my bags falls over and the extra second it takes me to right it, affords my nemesis the chance to snatch my eggs. I feel I cannot let this go without I not only hold my hand out to receive the eggs but remind the woman that " no, really I prefer to do this myself".

Things progress apace, without intervention, and I begin to relax, feeling the battle has been won. I then do what I always do, which is leave the soft squishy bread out on the end of the conveyor while I pack the heavier items first. This is a fatal mistake as it leads the charity packer to believe that some sort of cataclysmic packing failure has occurred that, presumably, can only be corrected with her assistance. She seizes this golden opportunity with both hands and proudly dumps my bread into the fridge back (on top of the milk and next to the raw meat etc.) and beams wildly in triumph.

Which is when I say the thing that no sane person in the history of the world has ever said.

""will you please stop touching my shopping?"

Is this it? Have I left sanity behind? AIBU?

SupermansBigRedPants Sat 22-Jun-13 14:15:19

I got so stressed reading that angry my ds is really hard work, the packing of my shopping is my military precision type job - i had a grown up boy scout last month try to pack angry i 'taught' him how to pack my shopping (not hard, cupboard food, fridge, freezer, toddler snacks, fruit etc)... he avoided me the next time grin

Haven't a clue why hmm he did offer to help!

SupermansBigRedPants Sat 22-Jun-13 14:17:18

My hard work toddler is the reason i have a very quick efficient to me system in place - i didn't mention him randomly grin

GilmoursPillow Sat 22-Jun-13 14:17:44

Right, I don't live in the UK so this is all new to me. Which shops do these charity packers frequent? Do you have to pay them to pack your shopping?

I will be visiting the UK in a few weeks and need to be prepared to tell them politely to sod off

BearsInMotion Sat 22-Jun-13 14:18:33

Definitely YANBU. Where I shop the cashier sometimes stops putting my stuff through and "helps" me pack, just because I was leaving my bread till the end rather than bury it under a load of baked bean tins. THERE IS A SYSTEM!

NotJustMeThenX Sat 22-Jun-13 14:43:55

Glad the usual unnecessary comments have been noticed by others confused

BarbarianMum Sat 22-Jun-13 14:55:44

YANBU I have a system for my packing and no other b*gger is touching it! smile

V. odd that she didn't respect your wishes. I always decline help but usually put 50p into the bucket anyway.

Wolfcub Sat 22-Jun-13 15:00:23

oh I wish I could have seen that. I am always terribly infuriated that, having carefully ordered my shopping on the conveyor belt so that it goes into bags in the right groups, the helpful till assistant assists in mixing it all up again when putting it into bags. I now make a beeline for the older gentlemen checkout assistants in Sainsbury's if they are in as their wives have clearly trained them well.

QOD Sat 22-Jun-13 15:00:59

Those charity packers would make a FORTUNE if they offered to help at Aldi!
I reckon they should stand there and just snatch it into your trolley for you, I'd pay! I get all confuddled

Justforlaughs Sat 22-Jun-13 15:03:07

I am surprised that the bag packer was an adult! I don't think I've ever seen one over the age of 12! My normal ploy is to ask them to load my shopping ONTO the conveyor belt leaving me free to pack my own shopping in my own perfect way. grin
I'd have paid to see that standoff mind!

KnittedC Sat 22-Jun-13 15:04:54

YADNBU, I was getting cross with her on your behalf while reading. Oh and thanks, "cataclysmic packing failure" made me arf for the first time today grin

Dackyduddles Sat 22-Jun-13 15:08:43

She looked like an mnetter?

I think I'm insulted.

primallass Sat 22-Jun-13 15:13:13


However, the people doing this are giving up their own weekend time to raise money, sometimes for small charities that struggle otherwise. Just chuck a quid in anyway.

GiddyStars Sat 22-Jun-13 15:15:01


I loved your post, it made me chuckle grin

primallass Sat 22-Jun-13 15:16:01

I do love the idea of getting them to load the conveyor belt instead. I will definitely use that one.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Sat 22-Jun-13 15:17:17

My DSs have done this packing, and it would take a complete twit not to realise that alientaing shoppers by being sooo persistent will not do your charity any good


apostropheuse Sat 22-Jun-13 15:18:33

YANBU. I hate the charity packers thing. It really annoys me that the supermarkets actually allow them to do it too.

On the odd occasion I go into the supermarket, rather than use online shopping, I say no thanks. If they don't move I say excuse me and push the trolley to the end of the checkout so that they have to move back.

I actually don't care what they think - they just need to let me get on with my business.

DorisShutt Sat 22-Jun-13 15:19:43

I tend to ask them to not help as I have a "system" but state that I am happy to make a donation anyway. And make eye contact that suggests that any infractions will result in their donation decreasing in size

TheRealFellatio Sat 22-Jun-13 15:26:49

This story has made my day. grin

OP I think you and were perhaps separated at birth - this is exactly the kind of thing that I would do. And I usually always agree with Worra but today I am glad you wrote the book. grin

Stopputtingitoff Sat 22-Jun-13 15:36:19

I find them extremely annoying too. Having carefully budgeted for my weekly shop I resent being guilted into chucking in a quid to help the local scout troop go canoeing down the amazon.

VeganCow Sat 22-Jun-13 15:46:29

Love it.

Have you thought about writing as a living? Just the right level of suspense in your description of something that on the surface is so banal, i actually couldnt wait to find out what happened in the end!

[gets a life]

Tee2072 Sat 22-Jun-13 15:47:33

I chuck them a quid and say 'I'll do it myself.' I've never had one not back off after that.

And I don't care that they are taking their weekend to help the charity. Why don't they just write a fucking cheque then?

::and breathe::

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Sat 22-Jun-13 15:53:51

{standing ovation} Well done OP.

RhondaJean Sat 22-Jun-13 15:57:20

YAbu packing your milk and raw meat in Thr same bag.

Some system that! grin

Tee2072 Sat 22-Jun-13 15:58:43

Why Rhonda? Do you lick the outside of your milk carton?

Whatalotofpiffle Sat 22-Jun-13 15:59:32

Ha ha brilliant! Well done smile

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