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To expect other drivers to be considerate enough to leave me room to get my baby in the car when they park?

(198 Posts)
VRBennett83 Thu 20-Jun-13 20:09:44

So this morning I went to the baby group I attend every Thursday, had a lovely time, then did a spot of shopping at the local shops before returning to my parked car, only to find a man driving a white van had parked so close to my passenger side that I couldn't get my four month old baby in! I had to climb into the back seat from the other side, whilst lifting the car seat with my little heavy lump in it. I even left the car at a slight angle just in case someone did park next to me, so I would have enough room, but he parked so close I could hardly get it open!

The man returns to his white van whilst I am putting my shopping away. I then start putting my pram down, and he starts inching his bonnet closer and closer to my bum, as he clearly thinks I am inconveniencing HIM and getting in HIS way! I make a point standing up and asking him if I am indeed in his way. He winds down the passenger side window and asks me if I have a problem. I point out that yes, I do. I told him he parked so close to my car that I had to struggle with my baby in through the wrong side of the car. Then what? Ah, yes, he gives ME the abuse! First he tells me I parked there after him. Erm, no mate. I parked up about two hours ago and parked in this space which was clear either side. He goes ranting on at me, I simply repeat that he had parked so chuffin close to my car I had to struggle with my baby and he tells me "Well I am in a van, you t**t". No, seriously. He appeared to believe that his having a wider vehicle meant that he had to give no consideration to how much room he leaves either side for others. He then told me that I shouldn't take it out on him if I had had a bad day. I promptly point out that I had had a lovely day until he came into my life.

I am so proud of myself for not swearing at him mind you.

Is it me or should people give me the same courtesy I give them? I never park in a space if I think it is too close to another car. What if that person was disabled and needed help getting into their car? Or what if, heaven forbid, that person had a baby and needed room to get that baby in the car? The amount of room he left me I wouldn't have got my dog in there! Is it also me being unreasonable to expect strangers to be polite to each other, apologise if they cause offence in some way and treat others as they wish to be treated?

Rant over smile

crumblepie Thu 20-Jun-13 20:42:54

if he was parked within the white lines then yabu , you should of parked in the parent/child spaces they provide everywhere .

ThedementedPenguin Thu 20-Jun-13 20:43:36

I agree with PP.

Yabu as long as he is within his lines.

Also I have on many occasions put my ds in through my side as passenger door opulent be opened wide enough. I wouldn't of got in a slanging match with anyone over it.

Seems a bit childish.


Yes, if he was in the lines he was technically ok. That doesnt mean he shouldnt think and realise it would be difficult for the car in the next space to have its door opened.

People are rude.

gordyslovesheep Thu 20-Jun-13 20:44:10

yabu if he was correctly parked, although he shouldn't have shouted you shouldn't have blocked him

having to climb over the seat isn't hard - next time leave the car seat in the car x

ThedementedPenguin Thu 20-Jun-13 20:44:34

Sorry I meant wouldn't have

CrapBag Thu 20-Jun-13 20:47:36

So for everyone saying that if he was in the white lines then its ok, does this mean that people are still not U if they are both within the white lines but each not in the exact middle of the space, so they are very close together and cannot get the door open on that side?

Technically they are still within their space but if you are too close to the next car then you should show some courtesy and move your vehicle over or if its too big, then find somewhere with more room.

Funghoul Thu 20-Jun-13 20:48:04

This happened to me today. We were both well within the lines, both parked straight, there just wasn't much space. Shit happens, deal with it YABU.

JedwardScissorhands Thu 20-Jun-13 20:51:26

If he was parked in the lines then there was no problem, and you were totally unreasonable to remonstrate and stick your bum in the way of his van (however the logistics if that work - can't really work it out).

People with attitudes like yours give all new parents a bad name. Not all of them expect the Red Sea to part and allow their PFB to pass.

WhataMistakeaToMakea Thu 20-Jun-13 20:53:09

''Is it me or should people give me the same courtesy I give them? I never park in a space if I think it is too close to another car.'' -

YANBU - I agree OP I do the same too. I don't understand why people don't think of others in lots of little every day things like this - it makes life easier to think of the next person sometimes - why wouldn't people want to just be a bit more thoughtful and have others do the same in return?

LittleBearPad Thu 20-Jun-13 20:56:01

Crapbag. If two cars are parked really close to one another as you describe, there will be heaps of space on the other side. It really wasn't worth shouting about in a car park.

NUFC69 Thu 20-Jun-13 20:58:55

Op, it's a white van, what do you expect? They follow different road rules to the rest of us (just like taxis do!). A few years ago one parked so close to me that there was not even room to sidle sidways down the side of my car to get in - when I asked the driver to move, he suggested that I get in the passenger's side and climb over!

arethereanyleftatall Thu 20-Jun-13 21:00:00

You are wrong. He was right. From your post you make it sound like he was in the white lines, just his car was too big for your likening. You and your baby are actually not the only people in the universe.

VRBennett83 Thu 20-Jun-13 21:01:45

Sorry I have clearly mispoken here - his passenger side wheels were on the line. I couldn't have squeezed in there at all if I had been a passenger. Basically, on his side he had left loads of room so he can open his door fully. His passenger side was to my passenger side. His passenger side was inches from mine.

I had to put baby in the passenger side as that is where the base for his car seat is fixed.

Also, I was behind my car folding the pram but as he pulled out forwards, he turned his wheel so the car angled towards me.

It's sad to see that I am in the minority of people that actually look to see how close the they parked to other people's cars before deciding whether to leave the car there or not. Whether I am within the lines or not, I would not park in a space where I felt my car obstructed the doors of a neighbouring car. What if they had a passenger? I can't count the amount of times I have parked in a space next to another and then realised it wasn't quite big enough for the person next to me to get in their vehicle, so driven round to find another. Sigh.

Shutupanddrive Thu 20-Jun-13 21:02:44

If he had room to get into his van, he couldn't have been that close. Maybe if you didn't park at an angle it might have helped?

Shutupanddrive Thu 20-Jun-13 21:04:00

X-post about the room for him to get in!

LittleBearPad Thu 20-Jun-13 21:04:37

If they had a passenger then they pull out of the spac and then the passenger gets in, it's fine.

Yes it's annoying to put a car seat in from the other side but do-able and again fine.

VRBennett83 Thu 20-Jun-13 21:04:41

NUFC69 - I thought this afterwards. He's in a vehicle he knows is wide so surely he should be mindful of how close he parks to the next car. I wouldn't have minded if he was smack bang in the middle of his space but he wasnt. He wanted plenty of room on his side, Oh well.

LittleBearPad Thu 20-Jun-13 21:05:55

If his wheels were on the line your must have been pretty close to being so too.

Sirzy Thu 20-Jun-13 21:08:01

Also, I was behind my car folding the pram but as he pulled out forwards, he turned his wheel so the car angled towards me.

How far away from the car were you stood? I can't see how it would be physically possible to angle towards someone stood close to the back of a car when pulling out of a tight space.

JedwardScissorhands Thu 20-Jun-13 21:09:03

You must have been pretty close to the lines too if he was inches away from your door. Park on the end if you need so much room.

TantrumsAndBalloons Thu 20-Jun-13 21:14:36

Can you explain what you mean by "parked at a slight angle" please?

kungfupannda Thu 20-Jun-13 21:14:52

When parking with a baby, follow these simple rules:

1) If there is a pillar/wall, park next to it. Even if this means things are a little tight on that side, no-one can park next to you and make it even tighter.

2) Always park fractionally closer to the white lines on the driver's side. Most people will do the opposite, in order to give themselves room to open the driver's door. The car to your right will therefore be reasonably close, but the one on the other side will almost certainly leave a reasonable gap. Use said gap to insert baby into passenger side.

3) Try to park as far from the entrance as possible in order as most people will try to get close.

4) NEVER park in between two empty spaces. This way you have no idea if people will come and park close to you. Yes, someone might move, but you have more control over things if you choose a space in between two other cars.

YABU though. No-one is going to peer in for a baby seat before parking. It's not always someone's fault, either.

I always try to leave enough room where possible, but I use one local carpark where the spaces are narrow and on an awkward angle, so hardly anyone manages to get in to the spaces properly. If one car parks over the lines, the next one has to do the same and so on. This means you can finish up looking like you've parked like a twat when everyone else leaves, leaving your car parked diagonally across two spaces, but actually, all you did was insert yourself into the only available space.

CloudsAndTrees Thu 20-Jun-13 21:17:43

If his wheels were on the line, then he was parked badly. But I don't think there's anything wrong with parking closer to a passenger side thn you would the drivers side. You can always drive out if the space to let a passenger in, and I think you are expecting too much if you want complete strangers to consider whether or not you have a baby that you may or may not seat on the passenger side.

Maybe he was more considerate than you think and thought it would be ok because the drivers side had enough space.

Maybe he has his own reasons for needing as much space as possible to get out of his van.

Turniptwirl Thu 20-Jun-13 21:19:45

YABU! Having a baby doesn't make you as entitled as you seem to think

redrubyshoes Thu 20-Jun-13 21:20:44

Oh my god I have read through this thread with glazed eyes.

OP get a grip - you have a baby NOT a disability. It is a parking space not a right.

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