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AIBU?

to think you need a total household income of >£120k to be able to afford a nanny?

77 replies

SESthebrave · 16/06/2013 21:35

I'm back at work after DC2 and currently both DC are in nursery. This costs £1500 per month.

In September, DS starts school and we will need to arrange care before and after school 4 days per week. We also have DD (just turned 12mo) who will need care 4 days a week.

There is an after school club associated with the school but it closes at 6pm and I can't guarantee being back by then. There is no breakfast club.

A nanny seems a good solution and I have met one I like and I think would be great for us as a family. She charges £10ph net. I can understand why she charges this but by the time we've paid tax and NI and insurance and anything else, I don't see how we can afford it.
Our combined gross income is approx £110k each year. We do have a fairly hefty mortgage costing £1700 per month.

Am I just doing my sums wrong or do you need to be earning more?

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WhereDoAllTheCalculatorsGo · 16/06/2013 21:39

yeah, what a shame for you Hmm

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EhricLovesTeamQhuay · 16/06/2013 21:39

I can't really imagine what any of those sums of money look like so I have no idea, sorry.

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Doha · 16/06/2013 21:40

We earned a fraction of that albeit with a smaller mortgage -it was difficult and l felt l was working only to pay her wages but what l had to remember it was only going to be short term until DD2 went to school.

It worked our fine for us-we just had to cut out the luxuries.

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SESthebrave · 16/06/2013 21:42

I'm sorry - didn't mean to come across all woe is me. I realise we're fortunate but I'm just trying to juggle things for our family as best we can and wondered if I was missing something.

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Sleepyhoglet · 16/06/2013 21:42

Child Minder for after school and nursery for youngest? Being an employer ( of a nanny) is a larger responsibility.

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havingamadmoment · 16/06/2013 21:43

I think most people have to work around things like this. We have 5, we started our own business after the 3rd as childcare was impossible. Dh works in our office 5 days a week, I work two days from 9-3 (so I can get to school pick up)and from home as needed the other three days.

Its not realistic to have a number of children and expect to carry on as normal with no impact to work and/or finances.

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DontmindifIdo · 16/06/2013 21:43

yes, you need a high income for a nanny to make financial sense. It's the expensive option for childcare, although the most flexible.

Could you look at childminders who'll do the school run for your DS's school? Most will give you a sibling discount so it'll work out cheaper.

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HedgehogsHogHedges · 16/06/2013 21:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

greenfolder · 16/06/2013 21:45

You need a childminder who will be more reasonable-charging you ph for dd and for before and afterschool for ds. Presumably you looked at this before you had your second?

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PrettyKitty1986 · 16/06/2013 21:45

Yes yabu.

My friend is a nanny who earns £25k.

If we completely cut back treats and savings, we'd probably need to earn £15k a year more than we do now to afford a nanny at that wage.

Which would still be a good bit less than £120k. What a ridiculous post.

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MaryKatharine · 16/06/2013 21:46

We had a nanny for a year about 7years ago. I can't remember how it worked out hourly but I know she was earning 30k which meant I was effectively working for £100 a month. Not great but it was the only solution to our child care issue. It is rare for an after school club to go beyond 6pm. In fact, most day nurseries only go to 6pm too.
It depends how much you want to work as you may find it better to take a couple of years out.

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SESthebrave · 16/06/2013 21:46

Thank you. Yes, a childminder is one option and we are booked to visit one in a couple of weeks. I'm not convinced she is right for us tbh but will look around for another.

The only other option I can think of is to find another family who may be interested in a nanny share.

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propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS · 16/06/2013 21:46

My single mum friend had a very cheap, young, nanny from abroad. The nanny had free board and food, 2 days of a week and a few hundred pounds pocket money a month. The deal was that my friend taught the nanny English. Nanny stayed for two years and they were both very happy with the arrangement.

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grabaspoon · 16/06/2013 21:47

I am on a low wage - but my boss is a single parent on a 27k p/a salary and she affords me on a full time basis.

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cottoncandy · 16/06/2013 21:47

I have children the same age as yours and have just started employing a nanny. It depends where you are but you could probably find a nanny for less than £10ph net. You could also consider putting DD in a nursery 1 day a week and use after school care for DS, and make sure you are back on time that one day? If you have a nanny less days her total wage is lower meaning that mark up over the net amount is less (IYSWIM). We are going for 3 days nanny, one day GPs, and one day I don't work. It is still a lot of money though but I think worth it for these few years - we used a nursery for our eldest but the logistics of one in nursery and one at school just aren't doable for us.

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CloudsAndTrees · 16/06/2013 21:49

Your problem isn't a nanny charging what she does, it's the size of your mortgage. It's huge, but you made that choice when you bought your home.

So YABU.

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WhereDoAllTheCalculatorsGo · 16/06/2013 21:51

grabaspoon, perhaps you could get more somewhere else, I can't imagine that you're on much if your employer is only on 27k per year?

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Quangle · 16/06/2013 21:51

No need for the sarcasm. OP is saying they take home a lot and still can't afford a nanny - has she missed a trick?

Answer is no. My nanny costs me about £28k a year which is obviously out of my taxed income which means I have to earn getting on for £60k just to pay for her. I don't quqlify for childcare vouchers which would possibly slightly help you OP but not much.

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nannynick · 16/06/2013 21:52

You do not give nannies working hours and your pay figure looks possibly a little high unless you are in London. You should also note that the nanny does not charge £10ph net. You as the employer decide on the salary and offer them a salary Gross... so £10 per hour gross, more in London such as £12 per hour gross.
If nanny is doing a 12 hour day, 4 days per week, then that's 48 hours a week so it will be a lot. At £12 gross per hour, that is over 2500 gross per month, and employers NI adds around £260 am month. Then there are the additional costs to take into account. More about that sort of thing over on the childcare board and on here.

Lets say total cost of nanny is £35,000 which you have to pay from your already taxed income. So based on 944L taxcode, you need to have an income of £49,000 to take home a little over £35,000

Then you have your living costs, travel to/from work, pension, all sorts of costs for your family... so that cost would need to be covered by your partner. Yes I know in RL it is not as simple as that but for the purposes of this, if say all your income went to paying childcare, then all your partners income would go on the other costs of living. How much your livings costs I don't know but I expect they could well be £35,000 plus given you are paying over £20k on your mortgage a year.

So combined income of £100k is possibly what you need.

So YABU in saying it's over £120k, as you are not giving costings for your living costs... which if it was over £120k, your living costs would need to be over £48k - which they may or may not be.

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redexpat · 16/06/2013 21:52

Au pair?

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ghayes · 16/06/2013 21:53

Move to a less expensive house. The vast majority of couples in this country earn about 1/3 of what you do and manage to get by without a nanny.

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TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 16/06/2013 21:53

Why don't you have a nanny share or a childminder? That would be the solution IMO.

Or an au pair with FT nursery for your youngest?

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marriedinwhiteagain · 16/06/2013 21:54

Can she live in - if not probably a childminder. Or you just have to suck it up and pay up and accept it's hard to get back on the corporate roundabout if you get off. Depends what you want in the long term.

With a mortgage that size the figures don't seem so silly to me. If you are in London 110k combined isn't a huge amount and probably wouldn't cover a large mortgage and a nanny comfortably.

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ghayes · 16/06/2013 21:55

How much does 110k pa come out to per month after tax? £6k ish?

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SESthebrave · 16/06/2013 21:55

I agree - huge mortgage which was and is our choice. We could move and make that less. We consider this our "forever home" though so would rather compromise on other things.

We obviously did think about this before having children but just having to make very real decisions at the moment.

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