An a regular but have name changed because I post way too much about my personal life on here. Pombears and squash are the work of the devil and such.
Bit of background, DM is very opinionated, always right and shouts until you cave in or run off crying. She has always had an 'I'm the parent and you're the child' mentality and has never really appreciated that I am an adult now. I have always felt incredibly responsible for her emotions, wanting to keep her happy etc, she had a very traumatic childhood and I feel sorry for her.
She has an uncontrollable temper in which all rationality goes out of the window, usually along with the possessions of whomever she is angry with. She kicked me out when I was 16, I'm now 23 with a professional career as a nurse.
Anyways, thanks if you're still reading! PFB is 10 weeks old. All throughout my pregnancy DM told me there was no point me trying to BF because she couldn't. No milk apparently. Well, with a lot of help from the HCP's DD is EBF. DM now admitted that she never tried, which is fine. I fully support anyone having a right to choose what they do with their own bodies.
However DM is constantly saying I should just get her on a bottle and get my life back, that my boobs are 'udders' and seeking reassurance that I won't be BF at 8 months etc (with any luck I will be).
She is also pressuring me to wean already giving loads of unwanted tips on purees etc and laughing at my plans of BLW. As well as insisting DD will choke and die.
I would smile and nod but it's just not enough for her. She always dismisses my plans and says 'you were FF and weaned at 2 months and you were fine'. I wasn't, I was a very sickly baby, child and adult. That may not have been due to anything she did but yesterday I ran out of patience and told her that. I reassured her that she just did what she thought was best at the time but that I didn't want to hear any more criticism because I was confident in my abilities to raise DD.
I didn't even go to antenatal classes because I didn't want any advice as to how to raise my child. DM knows this.
Anyways today she sends me a barrage of abuse on Facebook as to how I'm a terrible daughter, she spent all last night in tears because I think I'm so much better than her as a parent and I humiliate her etc.
I apologised that she felt offended but reiterated that I would not be discussing the upbringing of my child anymore. That wasn't acceptable and now I'm the worlds worst person and I'm gonna kill DD by co-sleeping. We don't cosleep
I ignored her messages and just kept saying I will talk to her when she has calmed down. But I can't shake te guilty feeling that she's upset and it's my fault. She won't talk to me for ages now, will tell DF it's all my fault and DD will miss out on seeing her GP's for ages.
AIBU to leave her this upset? This is the second time I've really stood my ground and it's awfully shaky.
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Please
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AIBU?
To just ignore DM until she shuts up?
35 replies
Idrinksquash · 12/06/2013 22:31
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