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AIBU to want to sit in my garden without being subjected to next doors loud music?

(112 Posts)
jamdonut Sun 26-May-13 16:32:28

Just that.

Lovely sunny day,chance to go out and sit in the garden, but next door have friends and their children over,and are playing awful repetitive Ibiza style music loudly. We've tried playing some Muse back at them,and they turned it down a bit,then we went in to have lunch and they turned it back up angry I wouldn't dare go talk to them about it...they're scary!

maddening Sun 26-May-13 18:44:34

Oh and times of the issues

twofingerstoGideon Sun 26-May-13 18:57:01

We play music in the garden and appreciate its not to everyone's taste (rock/metal) but as no one has mentioned it to us that its a problem why would we assume otherwise?

Glad I don't live next door to you. If you 'appreciate it's not to everyone's taste', why subject your neighbours to it? Presumably if they wanted to listen to rock/metal, rather than have peace and quiet, they'd play their own. Through headphones ideally.

This is really symptomatic of people putting their own 'wants' before other people's comfort and peace.

exoticfruits Sun 26-May-13 19:06:16

Why not play through headphones?

mermaid101 Sun 26-May-13 19:15:30

I posted about this last night. My DH had had his radio on in the garden, I had asked him to turn it off and although he did, he was slightly annoyed.
I asked if I had been U to ask him to do this as I, like you, think this is intrusive and selfish.

To my astonishment, another poster called me "a right selfish knob" for suggesting that music should not be played on - I think - the basis that I would have been making other noise in the garden.

I feel for you. It's a shame you can't speak to your neighbours about this. I just don't think that it is completely necessary to have music on outside. Is it really so important?

Many replies to my post illustrated that lost of people are very bothered and upset by their neighbours doing this.

jamdonut Sun 26-May-13 20:28:57

Thanks for the replies. Glad most people think I am not being unreasonable. There's no way I would approach them about it,but I've been keeping a record and might try the council's housing department soon,if I feel brave enough. I don't mind ordinary noise...and could put up with a little bit of music if it was just quietly playing in the background,but this was loud and just awful repetitive club stuff that I could hear every word of.

I mean...I like loud music.I go to festivals and rock concerts...but not in my back garden,thank you.hmm

Talkinpeace Sun 26-May-13 20:32:17

A pub over a mile from here had an "All day party" today.
I reported it to the Police and the Council
we could hear EVERY NOTE : as could ten thousand other homes

THis site
was easy to use

pumpkinsweetie Sun 26-May-13 20:37:59

I feel your pain, i once had a neighbour many years ago who made my nightimes a living nightmare by playing Elvis Presely every single night all night. So glad i moved house. I tried talking to him but he just threatened me, so i see what you mean about your neighbour being scary.
The only thing i can say, is write a diary everyday of the noise levels and after you have many entries take it down the council-they may be able to evict them in due course. Just keep complaining and writing that diary, maybe not now but in a year or so you may see the back of them.

rainrainandmorerain Sun 26-May-13 21:46:48

I hate this problem. I think it's partly (slightly) down to the idea that a garden is another room in our homes - when it isn't, it is a garden, and our behaviour/sound while we are in our gardens has a much greater potential to disturb than what we do in our living rooms.

Walls contain music (to a degree) - gardens don't. I used to live in a terraced 'block' (houses in terrace backed onto other gardens of terraced houses opposite). Come a sunny day, lots of people would be out in their gardens - one or two tossers would have their music on full blast, really deafening, and it contaminated an entire bloody neighbourhood.

Noise pollution is a big problem - councils have some power to act, BUT it takes a long, long time. Noise diaries, warning letters, more warning letters, evidence recorded by noise pollution officers, court appearance - it can be done, and it is, but it takes a long time. Police have no powers to do anything about it - and if you call 101 or 111 or whatever the number is in your area, all they do is put you through to the relevant council number. They have no actual powers themselves.

I sympathise hugely.

exoticfruits Sun 26-May-13 22:08:25

I hate it on property programmes when they say the garden is 'a great space for summer entertaining'-NO it isn't!! I don't want neighbours having regular outside evening parties.

JakeBullet Mon 27-May-13 07:39:24

Our neighbours went on until 3am!!! My only saving grace was that at 10pm they took the party indoors. Best of all was the reason for the celebration....their DD was 4 yesterday. Judging by the language it didn't stop one or two aunties/uncles/whatever downing large quantities of lager.

This morning it is peaceful and I am in the garden drinking coffee and MNing. might stick on some loud classical stuff grin

therighttoshoes Mon 27-May-13 11:09:35

why shouldn't people use their gardens for entertaining and play music at a reasonable hour? when it comes to summertime and gardens it's about give and take.
Do I appreciate my neighbors mowing their lawn and doing DIY at 09:00 on a Sunday morning? NO! Do I appreciate that they regularly light fires and BBQ when I have my doors and windows open and washing out? NO! Do I appreciate when their little girls plays football against my fence? No. Do I appreciate when their little girls climbs the fence (that is really quite fragile and and would be up to my landlord to replace) to stare at us? No.
Do they appreciate it when I have BBQ's, entertain friends and play music? Possibly not, but as neighbors we both understand that when you live in such a close proximity to other people there will be occasions when our "peace and quiet" will be disturbed.

I think anyone that states they like to enjoy peace and quiet in their garden is being unreasonable unless they live somewhere very secluded.

JakeBullet Mon 27-May-13 13:24:04

Ah but there is reasonable enjoyment of music etc and unreasonable. Reasonable is nice day, bank holiday and occasionally, unreasonable is every bloody weekend in the summer and continuing all night. God knows how they manage it as they all have young children...or maybe I am just an old fat.

tallulah Mon 27-May-13 13:39:07

therighttoshoes where we used to live (new estate, houses crammed in together) every house (except ours) had a big party at least once during the summer. They always started at about midday and went on into the early hours. As there were a lot of houses that meant every weekend there would be noise somewhere. Every bloody weekend.

Where has this idea come from that it is reasonable? If you want a party hire a hall. If you want to listen to music go to a festival. Nobody needs to inflict their noise on other people. You expect to hear lawn mowers, children playing, people talking. General everyday noise. But not music.

I think anyone that states they like to enjoy peace and quiet in their garden is being unreasonable unless they live somewhere very secluded. How about turning that on its head? Anyone who wants to make a lot of noise should live somewhere very secluded.

xylem8 Mon 27-May-13 15:44:36

YANBU. For some reason lawnmowers, hedgecutters, even strimmers don't bother me.Children playing, shouting , crying and even screeching I can tolerate, but music played outside really really winds me up.Bizarre!

Binkybix Mon 27-May-13 16:05:48

Ooh I can't decide on this one because I can see both sides. I think playing music at a low-ish volume is ok, but maybe because I've never lived next to someone who takes the piss I feel more relaxed about it. I do think its ok to have a party in the garden though if music is not loud, although again I've never been in a position where this happens more than a few weekends a summer.

Personally I find children playing loudly more annoying than music, but there has to be some give and take.

CrispyBF Mon 27-May-13 16:10:12

Same as xylem8 - I can tolerate most noises, but music/radio, even on a low volume, seems to trigger some part of my brain that causes rage. I wish it didn't, but a reaction is a reaction!

I wouldn't mind a couple of times a year though, especially if a note had been popped through the door etc and it didn't go on until too late.

alienbanana Mon 27-May-13 16:11:23

Nothing wrong with music in your garden on a sunny BH Monday.. the shitness of the music would annoy me, but I don't see a problemwith it.

Sounds like you have other problems with them though.

jamdonut Mon 27-May-13 16:19:12

All is peaceful(ish) today (some child noise but acceptable levels!)

I think anyone that states they like to enjoy peace and quiet in their garden is being unreasonable unless they live somewhere very secluded.

I think this is a very unfair statement. No-one should have to put up with unreasonable noise. Just because you want a BBQ/party doesn't give you the right to upset everyone else's day.

I also don't think lawn mowers should be used early at weekends...have some respect for other people!

itsnothingoriginal Mon 27-May-13 18:11:12

There is always someone who thinks loud music played in gardens is reasonable confused but I genuinely can't understand why?

If it's about your right to do what you like then what about the rights of others to enjoy peace and quiet and the sounds of birdsong etc..

Maybe I'm just old before my time but I really don't get this argument when we are very unlikely to share music taste/radio with our neighbours.

I've got a neighbour who can't be outside without radio 1 on full blast and it ruins the summer for everyone when he's around.

Talkinpeace Mon 27-May-13 18:19:54

WE have regular parties in the summer
we always let our neighbours know beforehand and the one time we had sound system and lasers running till 3am we prewarned them and they sat and watched

I really dislike loudness in the garden even at my own parties and put a rule of acoustic only (live playing) and stop at midnight

alienbanana Mon 27-May-13 18:23:45

My almost deaf neighbor used to spend about an hour mowing his tiny lawn... That was annoying enough.
He'd then wheel his tv into the garden and watch coronation street on very very loud.

That was pre DC though... So at least we could escape to the pub smile

Music really doesnt bother me though. I play it outside occasionally, as do my neighbors.

exoticfruits Mon 27-May-13 19:23:27

It makes you want to live in the middle of nowhere, without any neighbours-I want to know that I can go in my garden and have peace and quiet. I don't mind lawn mowers, children playing, chatter-I just can't stand music or radios, of any volume, in gardens-ever.

HamsterDam Mon 27-May-13 20:56:05

was worried op might be my neighbour. i play music in the kitchen so we can hear it out in the garden, not loud but i guess they can hear it, in fact one time i heard the man that lives there singing along to Amy winehouse. i have very eclectic taste so nothing repetitive, never full volume and never late at night. have had the odd party but always go inside at 11. im pretty sure they would speak to me if it bothered them, can't see the problem with it really, i like to listen to music while im enjoying my garden, sometimes we sing too does that make it worse??

arabesque Mon 27-May-13 21:44:48

Well, while you're 'enjoying your garden' Hamster, other people are trying to enjoy there's too. Loud music just isn't on, as it's not something you can contain within your own garden, and isn't something inevitable like kids playing, a lawn mower going etc.

Also, I cannot stand people who do something they know is probably annoying the neighbours but use the reasoning that 'they haven't said anything so it must be okay'. A lot of people don't want to get into confrontations with people they have to see every day of the week so will put up with a fair amount to avoid any awkwardness. It's totally unfair to put the onus on them to object, as opposed to being a bit considerate and not making unnecessary noise.

frillyflower Mon 27-May-13 22:11:58

Our neighbours have a barbecue almost every single day. It's made our garden unusable for us. I can't hang out washing or just garden or read in peace.

I hate it. Why do people have to be so bloody selfish?

What about my right to use my garden in peace?

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