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Driving to see friend - terrified of motorway

(104 Posts)
Gobbolinothewitchscat Thu 23-May-13 23:09:01

I'm an OK driver - not the most confident in the world but OK and have quite a lot of motorway experience.

I live near Manchester and have a good friend who lives in Liverpool. Normally, we meet in Manchester but she asked me to go to Liverpool today to see her.

The last time I went, I was around 8 months pregnant with DS who is 5 months old. I found the drive really frightening but thought it was perhaps because I was pregnant,,travelling home while it was dark and due to the torrential rain

DS and I went today and I'm still frightened out of my wits even though we came home hours ago. I can't sleep as everytime I shut my eyes I'm having flashbacks to the two crashes we nearly had. The motorway was chock full of lorries straddling the middle and slow lanes so I had to spend quite a bit of the journey in the fast lane. Even though I was going at around 90, I still had an arsehole hanging off my bumper. If I'd had to break suddenly I'd have been fucked.

I spent the whole time at my friend's house petrified about the drive home. On the way back, a car swerved in front of me from a slip road - over the unbroken line. I did the most dangerous thing - braked rather than moving out to the middle lane and was lucky not to be rear-ended by a lorry.

When I got home, I couldn't actually get out of the car for 20 minutes as my legs were shaking so much. I'm pregnant again and when I saw DH I burst in to tears as I truly thought we were all going to die on the way back. Coupled with having to navigate an unfamiliar route, my nerves are shredded v

I know this sounds totally melodramatic but I cannot go back in that motorway again. If I do, I'll either kill us all or lose my nerve so badly that I'll have to give up driving.

DH is a very confident driver but agrees that the road between Manchester and Liverpool is difficult as it's busy and there is also a lot of aggressive driving. He's said that I just need to tell my friend that I'm not happy to go on that road and to meet somewhere else. However, I feel really terrible about doing this as I'm normally a very capable person and I don't want her to feel that I'm expecting her to do all the driving.

AIBU re this? My legs are shaking again just writing this post

Ceraunia Fri 24-May-13 23:54:29

I agree take some motorway lessons for future. I do sympathise, I hate motorway driving, and even being a passenger, after an accident I was in years ago (though I was unhurt).

TiredFeet Sat 25-May-13 06:17:48

I read your op and immediately thought 'you need motorway driving lessons'. So I am glad the majority of posters agree with me. Please arrange some, you will be suprisesd what a difference they make

The slip road thing, well you should be aware of who is on the slip road

The tailgating, don't speed up, slow down ffs!

AngryGnome Sat 25-May-13 06:53:22

I think OP has flounced, but another vote here to get refresher lessons. I didn't drive for nearly 18 months after complication with pregnancy and birth, and I have lost a lot of my confidence, especially on motorways and when doing long journeys. Refresher lessons really helped - they reach you how to feel in control, by driving safely, anticipating potential hazards, and just giving you more confidence.

And don't do 90 in the overtaking lane if you a nervous driver ffs. Just chug along with the lorries, you'll still get there!

Sirzy Sat 25-May-13 07:04:54

I agree with those who say use the east lancs instead.

I drive from Liverpool to Manchester a lot and although its a pita at times it's not that bad and the two incidents you describe neither seem to warrant the way you over reacted.

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