My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

to be pissed off they aren't happy for us

47 replies

littlebitglum · 23/05/2013 16:59

me and dp have got engaged Grin. nothing with frills, just asked at home and both really happy . we are not big event people and don't really do grand gestures. updated fb profile (I knowGrin ) lots of people saying oh are you serious ect now grandparents the same oh you haven't done it properly. we have had a horrible year with close family bereavment and hospital treatment he has been a rock and this is the next step for us but everyone seems so bloody miserable about it because there's no grand gesture or new ring ( family passed down)

OP posts:
Report
RawCoconutMacaroon · 23/05/2013 17:05

Congratulation! As long as you are both happy, don't let the response of others spoil it!

Report
Manchesterhistorygirl · 23/05/2013 17:06

Congratulations! Passed down ring is gorgeous, remember its not old it's "vintage".

Report
littlebitglum · 23/05/2013 17:17

Grin we are. we are the pretty simple no frills type it suits us to just do without some big announcement. definatly will be vintage one day was my mums then will pass down as and when. just abit gutted that people think we are arsing about just because we haven't made a big thing out of it

OP posts:
Report
AgathaF · 23/05/2013 17:38

Congratulations. Your engagement, your way. They have all done theirs the way they wanted, your turn now.

Lovely to have a ring with sentimental value. You can't put a price on that.

Report
QOD · 23/05/2013 17:53

Raspppppt to them

Congratulations!!!!

Report
MonstrousPippin · 23/05/2013 17:55

YANBU. My DP proposed over a cup of tea in bed on a Sunday morning and didn't have a ring. I thought it was perfect.

Report
MonstrousPippin · 23/05/2013 17:55

And congratulations!

Report
Boosiehs · 23/05/2013 17:56

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Report
Tailtwister · 23/05/2013 18:00

Well, I think wearing a family ring is a lovely. Congratulations!

Report
diddl · 23/05/2013 18:02

Congratulations!

We decided-went to choose a ring, had to wait for it to be resized, told everyone when we had the ring!

No party for us!

ILs were Shock at the ring-she didn't have one.

So while my parents were really pleased, his were-why? what have you done that for?Grin

How does one get engaged "properly"??

Report
JedwardScissorhands · 23/05/2013 18:03

I think it's lovely. Congratulations! Most of the grand gesture proposals I know of either didn't make it to an actual wedding, or are divorced.

We just did the small thing too. New ring, though.

Report
Whocansay · 23/05/2013 18:04

Congratulations!

My wedding ring was my much-loved grandmother's. I think it's much more special for it. You do what feels right for you.

What the hell do your grandparents mean by doing it 'properly'? Weird.

Report
Wylye · 23/05/2013 18:08

Yay for you both! Thanks
You may as well start stopping caring what they say know tho (iyswim) as if they're like this over the engagement imagine what they'll say about your wedding! Grin

Report
Alicenotinwonderland · 23/05/2013 18:10

Congratulations!! It's about you and your husband to be, ignore the others and their opinions. So long as you are both happy nothing else really matters! Wine

Report
rumbelina · 23/05/2013 18:12

Congratulations! We decided in a tent in the rain and it was perfect. Dh was berated by colleagues for not doing a grand proposal. I'd have hated that.

It's one of those things where you can be judged for not doing it 'properly' but each to their own what matters is the who not the how.

Report
AgathaF · 23/05/2013 18:12

As Wylye said, be prepared to dig your heels in over their plans for your wedding.

Report
buswanker · 23/05/2013 18:15

My engagement ring was my grandmothers. I would not swap it for the most expensive ring in the world.

Getting engaged at home is lovely.


You said you are simple no frills so why would anyone want you to have a big fuss?! People are bizarre.

Report
MrsMangoBiscuit · 23/05/2013 18:20

Congratulations! I love the family heirloom for an engagement ring.

DH proposed by asking me first thing in the morning when I was just coming to. He said he figured he had a better success rate if I was still half asleep. Grin

Report
littlebitglum · 23/05/2013 18:20

aw you guys are lovely. I think you are spot on with the wedding Grin. maybe we will run off somewhere and tell Noone haha

OP posts:
Report
CAF275 · 23/05/2013 18:26

Agree with most other posters. If you both like the ring then sod everyone else - YOU'RE the one going to be wearing it FFS.

Personally I hate big engagement do's. Especially the ones where gifts are requested expected. I've lost count of the ones where the "happy couple" didn't make it to the aisle or, when asked when the big day is say something like "oh not for a few years yet, nothing arranged etc..." Confused

Many many congratulations - just do, or don't do, whatever you and DP want and are happy with.

Report
Bunnylion · 23/05/2013 18:29

My DH proposed on the sofa while we were having a cuppa one evening after work - with his mums engagement ring. Years on we are even more in love and very happy.

I'm always dubious of couples who need some public, top of the Eiffel Tower, 45 minute firework display, extravaganza. If the only motivation for getting married is because you are deeply in love and want to spend the rest of your life together, why would you need a big public production?

Report
Bunnylion · 23/05/2013 18:29

PS - congratulations! Smile

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Nelly000 · 23/05/2013 18:30

Are your family annoyed because it's 'no frills' or are they annoyed because they found out at the same time as friends/acquaintances on Facebook rather than before?

If it's the former, YANBU. What's a 'with frills' engagement supposed to look like? Confused

If it's the latter, I understand where they're coming from.

Report
Nelly000 · 23/05/2013 18:30

Oh, and congrats!

Report
Alicenotinwonderland · 23/05/2013 18:32

When we got married we decided to have photographs taken prior to the ceremony as we wanted to capture those first moments of seeing each other in private. Amazing photos by the way! When folk found out you'd think we had done something awful!

Bollocks to them, carry on as you like!

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.