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To not want to hear how busy people are, all the time?

(93 Posts)
Lamour Sat 18-May-13 16:12:57

I really am sick to the back teeth of people saying how busy they are. Lots of people are busy. Most just get on with it.

There is a mum I bump into at the school on a regular basis. Every conversation I have with her (usually initiated by her in the first place) goes along the same theme, of how terribly busy she is, and how her life is so hectic, and she has this on, and that on, and oh she's just so very very very busy. She volunteers this information. I have long since stopped asking her how she is as her reply is always "busy". We used to meet up but I got fed up with her asking me to meet her and then saying "I'm so busy for the next 6 weeks" and pencilling me in for a half an hour coffee in 6 weeks' time.

I also have an acquaintance on my Facebook friends list, who tells the Facebook world on a daily basis how busy she is, and lists the things that she has done each day. Then everybody marvels about how she fits it all in, and how she must surely be superwoman. Said woman does have several children, but IMO does a lot of unnecessary things and puts pressure on herself to make everything perfect. She will do something during an evening, such as ironing everything in her ironing basket, or wrapping up teachers' end of term presents, and then put a photo on Facebook of it, and again bleat on about how very busy she has been and what a busy evening, and how it's not easy to do things like ironing or present wrapping when you have several children.

It just feels competitive, and silly. As I said, lots of people are busy, but most just get on with it.

Decoy Sun 19-May-13 17:55:22

When "busy" people list their activities they sound the same as many other people who don't keep going on about being busy.

chocoluvva Sun 19-May-13 17:12:57

When people complain about being busy - through their own choice - I have no sympathy. Give something up or put up with it.

I'm bitter though as I have a chronic health condition which limits the amount I can do.

LaQueen Sun 19-May-13 12:10:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IbeginHere Sun 19-May-13 11:31:43

when her and her dh actually have a night in with the kids it has to be turned into a movie night, or some other big deal, like sitting in with the kids is an event

My fb friend is the same. Even the down time is planned to the nth degree. She writes at 9am on fb, 'pj day today'. I can imagine her getting up in the morning and saying 'right girls, today is a pj day so we will not be getting dressed'. In this house a pj day happens because we suddenly look round and realise we have been too lazy to get dressed, not something that is ever planned.

I do wonder if there is ever any spontaneity in their lives.

HerrenaHarridan Sun 19-May-13 11:15:35

When I was with my ex I used to thin I should start smoking again just for an excuse to leave him in the house with the baby held a hundred times a day while I stand outside and take deep breaths.

I tried just standing out there with a cup if tea but u just used to stare and all the things still needing done and feel tiredsad

HerrenaHarridan Sun 19-May-13 11:13:39

But I must confess a tendency to laziness whoever the opportunity arises, plus I mn when baby is sleeping on bus blush

HerrenaHarridan Sun 19-May-13 11:11:30

I really am that busy too blush

Usually 4-6 weeks ahead in my diary before I can guarantee enough time to properly hang out with friends.

I don't generally go on about it much. But to be honest you'd have to be a sick puppy to envy me ferrying my daughter to endless hospital appts ( 2hr round trip, will take between 1-4 hours)

Spending my whole fucking Saturday taking dd to visit her dad (4hr round trip plus contact time)

I also have 2 groups I take her to regularly (she is an only child)

Then various friends (close by to visit/ return favours) and family (far away Skype appts, develop photos and send presents etc.

Oh yeah and dd, the dog and the house / garden.

And I'm learning to drive!

Sorry if I've offended you!

magimedi Sun 19-May-13 10:27:46

My late MIL always gave the same reply when people told her how busy they were:

"Never mind, busy hands are happy hands."

Really annoying. grin

Jenijena Sun 19-May-13 10:21:43

No. A childless couple I know want to both work three days as they're just too busy... doing f all apart from moaning a out how the world needs to give them a break

BalloonSlayer Sun 19-May-13 10:17:10

the facebook thing is the eternal conundrum like diaries ipswichwitch - the only time I ever have time to keep a diary is when I have nothing interesting to put in it. During the times in my life that were worth writing about for posterity, I wouldn't have been able to find the spare minutes in the day to put it on paper.

ssd Sun 19-May-13 10:13:27

this does ring true to me, something I'd always suspected

ipswichwitch Sun 19-May-13 10:07:17

I get very hmm at people who spend ages on fb claiming to be sooooooo busy, listing everything they've done/have to do that day complete with endless photos and status updates. Surely if you are genuinely that bloody busy you don't have time to arse about on fb.

I know some that love to moan on about being so busy, and they don't have time to even read the paper when half the stuff they do is completely unnecessary. The truly genuinely busy people don't have time to whine about it. They just get on with it.

MulberryJane Sun 19-May-13 09:48:23

I'm busy when I haven't planned and prioritised, I'm on maternity leave and have never been so 'busy' although I'd never admit that for fear of (deserved) ridicule, lol. When I'm disorganised I find it impossible to fit every one/thing in. However, I know this is my fault. But some people cram so much into their days that they are constantly busy because they are hiding from something they don't want to confront. For instance, if you're busy then you don't have time to think about things which might be sad or scary. Maybe she's worried about being dissatisfied with her life and therefore hides behind the facade of 'being busy'? Just a thought...

ssd Sun 19-May-13 09:39:09

I know someone who told me last september that her weekends are now busy up till christmas (as she has so many friends to see)

shes the sort who would go to the opening of an envelope so she could say shes got something on

when her and her dh actually have a night in with the kids it has to be turned into a movie night, or some other big deal, like sitting in with the kids is an event

find it all a bit showy and desperate

MortifiedAdams Sun 19-May-13 09:34:47

This drives me mad too. There is a long running joke about our boss at work who always says she "doesn't have time for this!" whenever a potential disaster arises or someone needs assistance.

Its come to a point where its her catchphrase and she is ridiculed for it. What she realise is that if she actually worked the 40 hours she was contrcated instead of.swanning in at 9.30 and leaving at 2.45 she might well have more time to do things (it is.not possible to do this job from.home).

chickydoo Sun 19-May-13 09:21:49

I go out to work 7 days a week. I have 4 children & a parent who is dying & another with dementia.
I have Sunday morning off work to do everything relating to house & kids. ( should me mowing the lawn as I type) I really am busy & it's not much fun.

BeCool Sun 19-May-13 09:09:25

We used to joke that FINE stood for Fucked, Insecure, Needy and Emotional.

So what about BUSY?

Boring, Unfulfilled, Stressed and Y?

BeCool Sun 19-May-13 09:03:34

I read somewhere this week that BUSY is the new FINE.

"Hi how are you?"

SprinkleLiberally Sun 19-May-13 08:51:53

I dunno. I don't go on about it, but I am really busy. I work every day and evening. Run kids to activities. See family and friends and do one hobby. Lots of people do this level of activity with little "free" time. If they say something occasionally it's ok. If they go on constantly it's a pain.

FoundAChopinLizt Sun 19-May-13 08:45:55

Many people distract themselves constantly with busyness; they are terrified of having free time as they might have to get to know themselves and realise they don't know what the point of it all is and we're all going to die sooner or later So they keep busy, in case they fall off the wheel and down the rabbit hole.

Mixing metaphors.

PlumSykes Sun 19-May-13 08:38:59

I don't know how the busys do it. If I manage to make the beds and go to the supermarket between 9am and 3pm I am impressed with myself.

mashpot Sat 18-May-13 23:10:27

I call them busy bores. Get efficient for Gods sake. Totally agree that the really busy people aren't always bleating on about it.

FuckThisShit Sat 18-May-13 23:06:32

I'm generally too busy not giving a flying fuck about how busy (or not) other people are. In fact I have just had a huge cull on FB so I don't have to get updates on people's busy shit and bollocks.

cat Sat 18-May-13 22:41:53

I would contribute to your thread OP....

But sorry I'm far tooooo busy.

I've got church tomorrow at 9, followed by Gymboree at 11. Then I'm updating my baking blog whilst DH takes the DCs swimming.

Monday is Book Club and a lengthy stroll round Sainsbos.


ihategeorgeosborne Sat 18-May-13 22:37:07

I sometimes say I'm busy if I don't want to do something to be honest. If there is a mums night out somewhere and I really don't fancy it, I have said "I'm busy then". Also if I can't really afford to do something and don't want to I say I'm busy. I just always hope they don't ask me what I'm doing instead!

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