Advanced search

stranger giving my child money

(225 Posts)
trackies Wed 15-May-13 22:09:36

Was at a toddler group with my 3 yo. There was a professional photographer there taking pics as approved by lady who runs it. They sit on a seat infront of a white screen. My child had a turn. My child is very chatty and friendly and likes posing for photos, and he found him easy to deal with. Bit later on my child, who likes attention and chatting to people, chatted to him for few mins, whilst i was there. Photographer was saying how lovely he was and he'd made his day, and then he gave him a gift of £2 and told him to buy some sweets with it. This freaked me out. I was a bit stunned. I tried to politely say that we can't take his money (i didn't want it!) but he insisted on me taking it. As i was leaving i tried to prize the £2 away from my child but he was clinging onto it so i left cos i just wanted to get out there! Got home and explained to small child that should not take gifts from strangers, but it wasn't his fault. I should have done something at the time. I was just caught off guard. Told my DH who said this man should have not been giving money to my child, and agreed that it's weird, but it could have been just someone being nice. But he was not happy. I told couple of Mummy friends who said it was weird aswell. DH said i definitely need to talk to the women who runs the group just to say that it made me uncomfortable and give the money back. Do you think it's weird ? or an act of kindness ? what would you do ?

CocacolaMum Wed 15-May-13 22:11:49

he was just being nice?

ShatnersBassoon Wed 15-May-13 22:11:55

Aw, a few strangers gave my children money when they were young. It's just a kindness, they don't want anything in return.

Honeybadgerdontgiveashit Wed 15-May-13 22:12:27

Was he from South / London? Thats quite an old school thing to do, would not immediately alarm me.

Fuckwittery Wed 15-May-13 22:12:33

its an old-fashioned and possibly a northern thing. whenever i take my kids to church in the north east kindly old ladies press pound coins into my hands. i wouldn't have taken offence. its a bit offensive to refuse it i think.

CocacolaMum Wed 15-May-13 22:14:14

Best place for this is those seats at the end of supermarket checkouts.. my kids clean up there! especially on pension day!! mwahaha

anothershittynickname Wed 15-May-13 22:14:20


The poor guy was just being nice - relax a little!


HazeltheMcWitch Wed 15-May-13 22:14:22

Arf at SOuth / London / North thing.

To my mind, it's a Catholic / Mediterranean thing!

longingforsomesleep Wed 15-May-13 22:14:46

You say your ds chatted to the photographer while you were there so it wasn't like he was doing it sneakily. Why do you need to do anything?

ShatnersBassoon Wed 15-May-13 22:15:45

I think it's an everywhere, everyday thing. It's really not unusual at all.

ForkInTheForeheid Wed 15-May-13 22:15:55

Not weird at all. (The photographer that is). Your reaction on the other hand...

chocolatebee Wed 15-May-13 22:16:09

I was on the bus with DD1 (4) and DD2 (10days old) and a (30ish year old) women give them both 50p. I tried to say no but she got off the bus.

I was shocked and asked MIL about it and she said all old ladies used to give children silver as good luck.

I was very shocked but allowed both DD's to keep the 50p. this thread reminds me to buy DD2 a money box

Doubtfuldaphne Wed 15-May-13 22:16:35

Was he quite an old guy? I think in their day it was quite normal to give some money to kids to get themselves some sweets. It happened quite a bit when I was growing up.
Now we are much more protective or on our guard about strangers and I think, rightly so. When things like this happen its easy to think back about it more and think about what you should've said or done but its done now.
You did the right thing saying it wasn't your child's fault but not to accept things from strangers.

Fuckwittery Wed 15-May-13 22:16:37

ah catholic thing that would make sense

hobnobsaremyfave Wed 15-May-13 22:16:53

Nah its a west Wales/old person thing.

cocolepew Wed 15-May-13 22:17:00

I've had older people give my DDs a ound when they were very young, I just smiled and thanked them.
It's obviously an Irish thing grin

TidyDancer Wed 15-May-13 22:17:08

It is a southern thing, and it's happened to my two DCs a fair few times.

Never heard of it being a catholic or Mediterranean thing....

freddiefrog Wed 15-May-13 22:17:14

I'd just think it was a nice thing to do

I remember taking DD1 to a tea shop when she was quite young and getting a barrage of tuts and eye rolls from a table of elderly ladies who, I assume, took one look and assumed she'd be a PITA. She behaved impeccably and one of the ladies came over, commented that DD was a lovely little girl and gave her £1 to buy some sweets

Tobagostreet Wed 15-May-13 22:17:15

Not weird, just an act of kindness, which is less common nowadays.

cocolepew Wed 15-May-13 22:18:03


toffeelolly Wed 15-May-13 22:18:15

Do not see any harm in it , I would think not another thing about this .

StellaNova Wed 15-May-13 22:19:09

I took DS1 to have his haircut aged two and the guy in the next chair gave him 50p for being so good - I thought it was nice!

PilgrimSoul Wed 15-May-13 22:19:24

I thought it was an Irish thing. Not weird at all. A bit traditional, maybe old fashioned. But not weird.

MrsBungle Wed 15-May-13 22:19:31

My child has been given "a penny for a sweetie" a good few times. Where I'm from lots of people put coins in the pram. Bit old fashioned but harmless.

Disappearing Wed 15-May-13 22:19:31

I would have said its a Scottish thing, mostly done by older people. I'd also heard of older folks tucking coins into babies prams, sometimes complete strangers and not necessarily just good acquaintances.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: