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To be so honest...

(21 Posts)
Mullinsamy Sat 11-May-13 15:39:07

My mother in law and I have a really tempestuous relationship. She recently waited until DP had left the room, and then said "Now G has left, I am going to say something' I told her she could say what she liked, I would tell him anyway. She then went on to say that she had heard I had said something about her pretending to be ill as an excuse not to attend DS 1st birthday party. I denied this (as I hadn't said it), and asked her to name the person she said had told her. She refused to do so, but said that if she heard me saying anything about her again, she would not come to our wedding in May 2014. I told her if I had anything to say, I would say it to her face, and if she didn't come to the wedding over something as trivial as that, her only sons wedding, then that was her issue, and she was being ridiculous, but really it was DP she would be upsetting, and not me. I don't think she was expecting me to say that, and she went quiet for a minute, then told me it was best if we didn't trouble DP with this conversation. I told her I would tell him anyway. Then DP came back and we carried on as normal. I did tell DP later on the drive home, and he was bemused by it.

LalyRawr Sat 11-May-13 15:42:48

Frankly, it sounds like you handled it perfectly.

RatRatRat Sat 11-May-13 15:50:04

She sounds a nightmare, you sound awesome. Well done for sticking up for yourself. Wish I had your backbone sometimes. grin

Jan49 Sat 11-May-13 15:50:35

YWNBU for being honest. I think you dealt with her

SisterMatic Sat 11-May-13 16:10:55

Well handled. Will you teach me your technique grin

mrsjay Sat 11-May-13 16:14:46

oh well handled OP , MY late MIL would make snidey comments like that and I was always honest with her and upfront it isn't nasty just honest , ypu did well , is she always so weird and snidey,

MY mil said to me on the quiet' that her son would prefer to get married in a church as a registry office wasn't a real wedding was it, she went onto say that she wanted me to suggest it and not say she had said anything, I told him he said erm what is she on about now grin

Mullinsamy Sat 11-May-13 16:33:09

I firmly believe she made it up to cause a row. I don't think she wants to come to the wedding, but knows the rest of the family would look down on her if she didn't. She is crazy as a box of frogs.

Tee2072 Sat 11-May-13 16:46:35

You done perfect. People like that need to be called on their BS as much as possible.

claudedebussy Sat 11-May-13 16:47:46

well handled.

she'll think twice before trying to be so manipulative again.

GroupieGirl Sat 11-May-13 16:50:04

Best stealth boast ever! grin

LittleMissLucy Sat 11-May-13 16:52:13

You've got her on the run! Well done.
She knows your too smart for her antics now too - !

LittleMissLucy Sat 11-May-13 16:52:28

you're not your, sorry.

Mullinsamy Sat 11-May-13 16:53:15

Lol grin @ GroupieGirl

thebody Sat 11-May-13 16:55:43

Good grief. What makes people like this tick?

Well done op.

quoteunquote Sat 11-May-13 16:58:50

Well done you, she will have a lot to ponder on.

I really got it in the neck on here once, because I said that I tell my DH everything as does he,

We have to because we both have at least one person in our families that deliberately sow seeds, in order to cause problems.

Mostly they no longer attempt it because they know we information share.

ShipwreckedAndComatose Sat 11-May-13 16:58:55


quesadilla Sat 11-May-13 17:00:47

She sounds like a nightmare. I think you handled it really well and I wish I had the presence of mind to think on my feet like that.

mrspaddy Sat 11-May-13 17:02:26

Ah now.. she is a ticket.. you did brilliantly to handle her like that. I would love to have your guts. You totally sorted that one anyway

Hip hip wine horray

buildingmycorestrength Sat 11-May-13 17:19:32

Thank you for sharing a fantastic set of responses! Always helpful to have a few well-chosen phrases up one's sleeve when dealing with the mad. grin.

WafflyVersatile Sat 11-May-13 17:43:08

Well done. And quite right to tell your husband.

I hope she doesn't go away, regroup and come back with more cunning nonsense.

Do update the thread if she does. blush

Does your husband recognise this sort of behaviour from her?

Mullinsamy Sat 11-May-13 18:46:04

There have been many issues with her over the years - between DP and MIL I mean, so he is aware of what she is capable of. She terrified me until recently, but since having my son, I hardened up to her. It was that or let her carry on and ultimately it would impact my sons life.

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