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To think babies aren't 'happy with anyone in the early months'

(29 Posts)
FrogInABog Thu 09-May-13 15:23:47

I constantly hear/see people saying 'Oh all babies are fine being left with anyone as long as they're warm and fed until about 6 months' etc. I have never found this.

Even as a premature baby in nicu , EDs heart monitor would raise when someone else held her, once home she would cry if put down or handed to someone else from day 1. After about 2 months home, she would go for cuddles for a few minutes, then become inconsolable, and now at 9 months, she will go down for longer periods, and sit by other people, but if anyone she doesn't know well picks her up she will scream.
I just don't understand the assumption that babies are clueless about their parents until they're older. And I especially don't understand the 'You're being PFB if you don't leave DC to be babysat as they will be fine' type comments.

10storeylovesong Thu 09-May-13 20:27:19

My ds is also a SCBU baby. He was in the unit for 9 weeks and is now quite happy being held by anyone, as long as he is being held. He hates being put down. He settles slightly more with DH and I but will happily be left for an hour or so with grandparents.

PrincessScrumpy Thu 09-May-13 20:41:14

Dd1 was generally unhappy for 4 months with whoever, dds 2 and 3 happy with anyone - every child is different.

everlong Thu 09-May-13 20:43:23

OP who are all these people who constantly say this?

thecakeisalie Thu 09-May-13 22:43:20

I never really got that comment either but having said that I've not been one to leave my babies young partly due to bf'ing and just because it was too hard to leave them until they were nearer 6 months.

Ds1 was great with dh and would sleep on his chest for hours also would be happy to have cuddles with other people. Ds2 despite being parented the same way, having skin to skin contact with dh after the birth is just a difficult little chap who would barely settle for me and would scream the house down with anyone else including his dad. Some babies are just higher needs than others ds2 has gone on to be a breath holder who has gone as far as having reflex seizures because he holds his breath so long when he gets upset. Like I say he has been a highly strung little chap since the day he was born.

No sweeping statement is ever going to cut it when it comes to babies and lets face it the people who say these kind of things are either naive or they've forgotten what having a small baby is really like.

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