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To be annoyed at DS teacher for missing taking time off for this?

(191 Posts)
Seriouslyirritatednechanger Tue 07-May-13 19:06:50

My eldest DS is at a notoriously crappy school as it is, I have tried to move him at various points throughout secondary to no avail. One of his teachers is guardian to a child in his year. As a result we have had restricted parents evening times available meaning my dh could not attend with me because she wanted to see her child's teachers on the same night hmm, the child frequently behaves badly and on some occasions the teacher has missed the start of DS lesson to be called in by the head when he deals with bad behaviour. The teacher has missed several lessons to take her child to appointments this term already and it is gcse so DS needs the teacher to revise with. This teacher is the only one for the subject in the school so cover teachers can't teach them. The teacher has refused to give DS extra revision sessions even though it is a subject he really struggles with and he did badly in his controlled assessments so needs a miracle to do well overall. No doubt the teacher will be giving her child extra help outside school but because I do not teach the subject or at all this is not an option for my child. I thought teachers were not meant to miss school time as they have short days and all the holidays to have appointments etc so I don't understand why she cannot do this like any other teacher. Others of DS teachers have children and this does not happen half as often. I feel like she is putting a child she looks after over my son and the importance of gcses for the whole class hmm

CloudsAndTrees Tue 07-May-13 19:26:35

The fact that your DH couldn't arrange his life to meet this teacher is his fault, not hers.

If the teacher has to do these things for the child she cares for then she has to. The school may be dealing with it badly, but that's not the teachers fault.

There is no reason why she should be expected to provide extra revision sessions. Pay a tutor if you want your child to have more teacher time.

Why do you say that she is helping this child with revision as if its a bad thing? It's not.

Teachers do not have short days.

Seriouslyirritatednechanger Tue 07-May-13 19:27:06

What I meant is that teachers only work until 3.30, so they have access to appointment slots other working parents don't.

DS isn't brilliant at the subject, no, but not for lack of trying. He hasn't been offered any revision sessions at all, nor are missed lessons on the teachers part being made up for.

FreddieMisaGREATshag Tue 07-May-13 19:27:33


FreddieMisaGREATshag Tue 07-May-13 19:30:53

If you have an appointment with the doctor and they tell you that it's next Tuesday at 4, do you ...

a arrange your life to be there on Tuesday at 4 because it's important


b complain on an internet forum that the doctor wouldn't see you on Friday at 9

Can't you see that it's your job to be there at the time and if your husband can't make it then it's his priorities that were different at the time?

YouDontWinFriendsWithSalad Tue 07-May-13 19:31:09

Short days? Haha.

Why should the teacher be obliged to give your DS extra revision sessions anyway? Because her child gets them for free?

You seem to know a lot about the appointments, where has this information come from?

spanieleyes Tue 07-May-13 19:32:17

Monday-revision club until 4,30, then an hours marking, rest taken home.
Tuesday-PE club until 4.30, then an hours marking, rest taken home,
Wednesday-Staff meeting until 6pm, then marking taken home
Thursday-PE match to referee until 4,45, then an hours marking, then rest taken home
Friday-SLT meeting until 5,00, ( marking done on Sundays!)

Yep, 3.30 finish every day!

FreddieMisaGREATshag Tue 07-May-13 19:33:38

And, if your son had an appointment to go to, you would expect to be allowed time out of work to take him. Why shouldn't she?

CloudsAndTrees Tue 07-May-13 19:34:05

Teachers do not only work until 3.30. And even if they did, it wouldn't help with appointments anywhere other than the hairdressers or dentist.

Does the school routinely offer revision sessions? I don't remember having any when I did my GCSEs. Revision lessons as part of the normal timetable yes, but not extra sessions.

Pozzled Tue 07-May-13 19:34:14

Oh, that old chestnut.

Yes, yes, we finish at 3.30pm. Then we do the staff meetings, planning meetings, a few minutes each day for putting away resources. If the appointment was next door to the school, it would probably be possible to make a 4pm appointment. Add in travelling time, and it really is difficult. That's assuming it's possible to rearrange, multi-agency meetings, medical issues etc often cannot be rearranged.

GoblinGranny Tue 07-May-13 19:44:08

Was this an essential GCSE?
If he's struggling, then it seems an odd choice to have made if he had alternatives. I'm assuming it's possibly a language as there's only one teacher in the school for the subject.

lunar1 Tue 07-May-13 19:46:05

I completely agree teachers have their own lives too, but how much time every week is being missed for this subject?

I think it sounds like the teacher and students need the support of the school and they should be getting some proper cover arranged for her.

FreddieMisaGREATshag Tue 07-May-13 19:47:34

And how very DARE the teacher help her own child outside of school. Bloody ridiculous. Shouldn't be allowed.

Seriouslyirritatednechanger Tue 07-May-13 19:53:04

It is a language, DS was pushed into doing it because of the ebac. Which as I understand it is now being phased out hmm

There's plenty of time during the holidays though, plus possibly a partner who is not responsible for the education of children.

Seriouslyirritatednechanger Tue 07-May-13 19:54:30

Pozzled all the lessons the teacher was absent from, the child was too bar one. Coincidence? hmm

GoblinGranny Tue 07-May-13 19:55:42

There's a lot of useful stuff online to help him at home. How much work is he putting into a subject he's not happy with?
You are still seeing it as an issue with the teacher, when it's a SLT problem they should be solving for all of the children involved.

ApocalypseThen Tue 07-May-13 19:55:49

Foster kids, eh? All the advantages. Why will nobody look out for the welfare of kids who live with their parents and don't have exceptional needs?


exoticfruits Tue 07-May-13 19:58:33

I am still laughing at 'the teachers finish at 3.30pm' ......if only........
When my DS had extra revision sessions it was the goodwill of the teacher and not part of the job.

Tuppence2 Tue 07-May-13 19:59:50

Does your work allow you or your DH time off for appointments that cannot be rescheduled to a more convenient time?
How do you know that the teachers husband/partner does not do his fair share of attending appointments?
You have no clue what these appointments are for and quite frankly it is none of your business.
If the school is providing adequate cover of GCSE lessons, then take that up with the head, but get off your high horse about her having other important commitments in life... It's an weird concept, I know, but teachers have lives too!

Spikeytree Tue 07-May-13 20:00:42

With the action short of strike action going on, there is no assumption that staff will provide revision sessions.

The Ebac is not being phased out, but if you can't pass the Ebac subjects at a C or above there is no point in attempting them.

I think I'm getting too thin skinned to listen to this crap over and over.

Tuppence2 Tue 07-May-13 20:01:31

Oh, and maybe take some responsibility for your son's education... It is not all down to the teachers!
Get him a tutor, buy revision guides/study aids, instead of whining about his teacher!

stillenacht Tue 07-May-13 20:02:14


Fairenuff Tue 07-May-13 20:03:57

Pozzled all the lessons the teacher was absent from, the child was too bar one. Coincidence?

Well, if the teacher had to take the child to appointments, then I would expect them both to be absent. It is very likely that the child needs specialist professionals who will just issue an appointment. It would not be negotiable.

It's a bit like if you're on the waiting list for an operation and your date comes through. You're not going to say, I can't make that time, what else have you got, are you? You have to take the appointment you're given.

Scholes34 Tue 07-May-13 20:04:45

Is there really just one language teacher for the whole school?

Put your energies into helping your DS using BBC bitsize or other web-sites. There are some excellent sites for vocab and listening comprehension.

Shesparkles Tue 07-May-13 20:05:23

I feel like she is putting a child she looks after over my son and the importance of gcses for the whole class

Funnily enough I consider my children above my job in the emergency services, but it's ok for me to do that as I work very long shifts

cansu Tue 07-May-13 20:06:18

I think you need to wind your neck in. The teacher taking time off is none of your business. You seem to be taking far too much interest in the child she is guardian for. Teachers do not have to give extra revision lessons. Most spend hours marking and preparing especially at this time of year with exams coming up and coursework administration. They do not finish their work at 3.30 many get out the books when their children have gone to bed. I suggest you get a few revision books for your dc and spend some time helping him practise for his controlled assessments. You sound very hung up on whether the teacher will be helping her own child or the child she cares for. Given what you have said here about being called away to help with his behaviour I think his homework is probably low on her list of priorities.

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