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to issue a helpful ear piercing decision making flowchart?

(65 Posts)
ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 12:48:20

Here it is:

Do the ears you are thinking of piercing belong to you?
Yes = go to [A]
No = go to [B]

[A] Are they located on your own personal body?
Yes = go to [C]
No = go to [D]

[B] What the fuck? You want to pierce ears belonging to someone else? Are you mad? Other people should really have the choice over the state of their own ears don't you think? I mean would you be okay with someone randomly attacking you with a piercing gun in the street? No I didn't think so. Do NOT do this.

[C] Good luck with your decision, I couldn't care less what you choose to do. I hope you enjoy the outcome.

[D] What the fuck? You think someone else's ears belong to you? Are you into owning people? Or slavery? Or do you have some other sort of issue that makes you think that other people's bodies belong to you? Do NOT do this and remember that evil starts with treating people as possessions....and that includes children.

ICBINEG Thu 09-May-13 13:21:24

theo I agree it is a tiny thing by itself, but to me it indicates a whole attitude that I find repulsive.

I personally would never permanently modify my DD's body for any reason other than medical. Because from the moment she was born I respected her rights as an independent human being. I don't own her or her body in any possible sense.

When someone decides to pierce a babies ears they are saying that their own fashion/aesthetic preferences are more important than the child's autonomy of it's own body.

That truly is a repulsive attitude to me.

theodorakisses Thu 09-May-13 12:59:21

I know this was a lighthearted thread and didn't really mean to tell you personally to fuck off, I just don't really get why people care so much. There are some really shitty parents out there who don't deserve children, I personally don't think ear piercing is an example of shittiness. Each to his own though, no offence.

ICBINEG Thu 09-May-13 10:33:00

I said it loudest...

theodorakisses Thu 09-May-13 10:18:33

I said it first.

ICBINEG Wed 08-May-13 09:36:12

nina yes - but it is going to start smelling bad very very soon....

theo [A] = fuck off yourself.

NinaHeart Wed 08-May-13 09:34:29

I am Van Gogh and have given a hastily removed ear to a prostititute. Or maybe Gauguin.

Could either of these people legitimately pierce it?

eminemmerdale Wed 08-May-13 09:17:14

ditto - jokes about artificial ears <double sort of huff>

eminemmerdale Wed 08-May-13 09:16:27

Actually, the mouse that had an ear grown on its back was for people like me and my dd who were both born with only one ear, so she wouldn't have to go through 16 years of painful reconstructive surgery like I did as a child so I get a little pissed off when people start making ear jokes <sort of being serious but not sure if I am or not, but be a bit sensitive - huff>

theodorakisses Wed 08-May-13 09:10:31

Do you
[a] mind your own business? = Go to [c]
[b] post attention seeking threads that have been done to death? pick [d]

[c] = normal person
[d] = fuck off

sashh Wed 08-May-13 01:38:21

It's an old belief, more to do with sailors than Cornwall.

ICBINEG Wed 08-May-13 00:43:04

What now? Did people in cornwall think that ear piercing was linked to sight?

sashh Wed 08-May-13 00:39:35

What about artificial ears? If someone only has one ear and wears a fake do they need to match.

What about number of piercings already?

What if you are from an old fishing family in Cornwall and you want the next generation to have good eyesight? <yes I know this has dies out but you never know>

ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 23:25:39

hmmm yes I suppose even spare ear growing could be move above the poverty line for the average mouse... <ponders>

ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 23:24:41

right parking.

So, you are thinking of parking in the P&C spot:

Are you travelling with a child who needs help getting in and out of the car?

No = go to [A]
Yes = go to [B]

[A] Are you intending to pick up a child who needs help getting in and out of the car in the shops to take home in the car? (no - this isn't a child selling shop <face palm>)

Yes = go to [C]
No = go to [D]

[B] Are you intending to get the child out of the car and into the shops?

Yes = go to [C]
No = go to [E]

[D] Do you, or anyone travelling with you have disabilities that might mean the extra space is useful for you?

yes = go to [C]
no = go to [F]

[C] Okay best of luck with that...although shopping is never fun is it?

[E] = what the fuck? Don't leave your children in the car! They could be kidnapped or smashed into or just simply unexpectedly explode. Do NOT do this.

[F] = get out of the freaking P&C you able bodied (currently) childless scum! Or else someone IS DEFINITELY going to tut at your or something...

NB: this might need work....

Although I would rather move onto using the wheelchair space on a bus....

<girds loins>

quoteunquote Tue 07-May-13 23:23:56

Well the mouse was touting for work, I thought I would be doing it a favour,

I just thought you should include this possibility in your most excellence flow chart.

TheChaoGoesMu Tue 07-May-13 23:17:36

What if I want to pierce dd's barbie dolls ears? Where do the ears of an inanimate object fit into your flow chart?

ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 23:05:52

quote what did mice ever do to you? grow your own extra ear you lazy sod!

ZebraOwl Tue 07-May-13 21:53:13

Am trying to work out if OP is very brave, very foolish, or some charming mixture of the two.

Good luck with this one, ICBINEG...

quoteunquote Tue 07-May-13 21:36:36


If I grow an ear on the back of a mouse to transplant on to my head, can I pierce it in advance?

ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 21:32:01

Just warming up the grey cells for the P&C parking version...

TheVermiciousKnid Tue 07-May-13 21:14:20

I think you are ovearthinking this. wink

ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 20:51:56

Right well it's not like it is actually up to me...but in the world according to ICBINEG, Anyone younger than 12 yos need protecting from making choices they are not old enough to understand....because your brain is not done baking till you do puberty etc.

some 14 years and over have a fair stab at making informed choices, but not all....

and the whole 12-14 is something I am going to wait and see on.

ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 20:47:54

<dons hard hat>

Okay we shall also need to add 'is ear piercing part of your professional role?'

Yes = consider getting a real Job that doesn't involve cashing in on the cosmetics industries deliberate undermining of peoples body confidence.

ooohhhh that a bee....or a ripped out 5 year olds piercing...

foreverondiet Tue 07-May-13 20:44:08

Ears belonging to 9 year old dd begging to have them done? If child wants to have them done with no pinning down or bribery and the parent us happy with it then surely it's fine??

ICBINEG Tue 07-May-13 20:43:35

gnghghgh okay how about if I insert

'Is the ear human and attached to its original owner?'

Gah that is all manner of not on MN would EVER start a flow chart with that!

I am sure MNHQ would back me up on that...

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