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to feel just so jealous of my friends with good babies?!

(55 Posts)
inneedofsomehelpplz Mon 06-May-13 12:42:44

my 12 week old daughter means the world to me BUT jeez she is hard work - wont sleep anywhere but on me & wants to held all day - takes 3 hours every night to put to bed. my friends are always telling me how their children play/nap alone & sleep through the night..... what i would give to go for a wee & brush my teeth right now but she is fast asleep on me. i dread taking her out as she hates her car seat/pram/sling & just wants to be at home. its such a lovely day but my other children are stuck indoors cause i dont want to see my baby distressed by taking her out.

so aibu by wishing i had an easier baby?! but on the plus side ive bern told hard work babies are easy toddlers?

maddening Mon 06-May-13 21:09:57

And swaddling was the thing that worked for us - we used the woombie which is a one layer swaddle and they have summer thicknesses too - so safer from a sids pov (addresses the overheating aspect of swaddling). And no worry of blankets over faces as it is a zip up "pod" which allows arm and hand movement within the swaddle.

steppemum Mon 06-May-13 21:24:07

ds was very easy baby. He is hard work aged 10!!

theweekendisnear Mon 06-May-13 21:27:52

My DC1 was the same. And she didnt want a dummy, so she would be overtired, and unable to go to sleep without crying. Going out was horrible. She didnt like the pushchair, car seat, but she was happy when carried around. She would not sleep through the night until two years old... And wake up at 5 am and be ready for the day. I was so tired all the time.

She is now a very very intelligent, caring, sensible 11year old. Other mums , and all her teachers, tell me I have such a wonderful child (DD has her little faults, but she hides them well to the outside world, and she does look perfect).

I dont know what I should have done differently. My DC2 was such an easy baby. I couldnt believe that he would suck his thumb and be content, and go to sleep and remain asleep for hours.

Just do what you feel is right. Dont listen to anybody. I hated when people where giving me advice. Nothing seemed to work. I think my DC1 was just very sensitive and she needed reassurance.

If anybody can help you, accept the help (cant anybody take your children to the park while you stay home with the baby? Cant anybody let you rest while they take care of the baby? )

Most importantly, dont ever feel guilty. You are doing a splendid job, and your DD is the most beautiful, most intelligent , most lovable baby in the world, much better than all the other babies that sleep 14 hours per night.

Murtette Mon 06-May-13 22:30:05

Its tough, isn't it? DC2 hated the sling, the play gym, watching the mobile or anything else which DC1 had loved. He'd tolerate the bouncy chair provided it was on vibrate mode and would also tolerate the babybjorn bouncy chair if it was in its most upright postition. It made those first weeks so tough. He also posseted all the time meaning I was doing several loads of washing a day. He screamed constantly unless I (and yes, it had to be me) was holding him for the first six weeks when he found his thumb and calmed down a bit; things then transformed at 14 weeks when he learned to roll onto his tummy as that was how he wanted to sleep. He's now 11mo and, if unsettled, the best way of calming him is for me to lie down with him lying on my tummy - now he's such a "big" boy & getting so "independent" (i.e. he can crawl and smiles on going to the childminder's), I love the fact that snuggles with mummy can have this effect. He still often spends a couple of hours a day in the sling, something he hated in the first few months.
Good luck!

hairclipcloe Mon 06-May-13 22:43:45

My Dd is now 6 months and will only sleep on her tum. She has silent reflux and things were awful at first - she was only able to sleep propped up on us until we realised what it was and got her appropriate meds from gp and let her sleep on her tum at around 3 months. If she was on her back, even with wedges she would scream and writhe around, was awful.

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