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AIBU?

To be annoyed with DH for not feeding the baby the food I prepared

83 replies

finnbob · 03/05/2013 21:21

DH works away 4 weeks at a time so I am usually wrecked by the time he comes back as 8 month old wakes once a night every night.

I organised a day away for myself today, shopping, lunch, facial.

Left lunch and dinner in the fridge to be reheated for the baby. When I came home they were both still there. The baby hadn't had dinner yet but his lunch was still there too. So I was a bit pissed off and said what did he eat. He gave him a yoghurt, but not his baby one, a fruit corner. He said he forgot he was supposed to give him pasta.

I lost the plot then and threw the meals on the counter and said why did I bother making food for him if you can't be arsed to heat it and feed him. And I shouted a bit about not being able to have one day off.

He got stroppy and said he didn't realise what he was supposed to give him. I just thought I couldn't have made it any easier and that he obviously doesn't listen to a word I say. So he stormed off and I started crying. I did actually tell him many times about reheating the food and to give him a yoghurt after his pasta if he was hungry. I don't usually go away for day so I had told him everything I thought he'd need to know.

Days relaxation undone in 2 minutes lol! So do your worst, WABU to get in such a state!

OP posts:
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5318008 · 03/05/2013 21:26

YANBU at ALL


I hope the baby had some milk throughout the day

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MrsTerryPratchett · 03/05/2013 21:26

Sorry YABU. I think because you are used to DH being away and everything being done to your standards/your way. So what if DC ate a Fruit Corner? Will it really matter in 20 years? Time with Daddy will matter. So far my DH has given DD (2 yo) McDonalds, cake, ice cream once a week and several other things she would never have had with me. She knows its Daddy treats and doesn't bug me for them.

Throwing the meals and crying does sound like there are other things going on...

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VinegarDrinker · 03/05/2013 21:27

Erm, YABU. Massive overreaction.

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Sirzy · 03/05/2013 21:29

Unless he was screaming with hunger then YABU.

The baby ate, may not have been the greatest food choice but it was far from the worst.

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mrsjay · 03/05/2013 21:29

I also think you are being U and overracting sorry but he did give him something and the baby is ok your husband is a twit for not feeding him what you prepared but he did feed him baby yoghurts are a rip off fwiw a fruit corner does just as well

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SirBoobAlot · 03/05/2013 21:30

Depends, how old is the baby and what else did he eat apart from the fruit corner?

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IneedAsockamnesty · 03/05/2013 21:30

Was it all she had to eat?

If so yanbu is he usually that incompetent?

If not chill

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DribbleWiper · 03/05/2013 21:30

YANBU - if you told your DH that many times, he should remember what you said. It's not complicated to feed the baby what you prepared. You should be able to go out for the day with your mind at rest knowing your DH can handle things at home properly. If you're the one who's always at home with the baby, you're perfectly entitled to plan how things are done, imho. I hope he listens more carefully in the future. You really shouldn't have to write down "feed the baby the meals in the fridge" for a grown man.

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GirlWiththeLionHeart · 03/05/2013 21:31

Yabu. At 8 months old they don't need 3 square meals a day. Milk is still the main source of food, so as long as he had enough milk, he won't perish.

The main thing is your dc and dh had fun and bonding time.

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CookieLady · 03/05/2013 21:31

Look, at least your dh didn't give your little one this morning's left over porridge for tea. Angry Sad

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DefiniteMaybe · 03/05/2013 21:32

So you were out all day and your baby just had a yogurt to eat? I'd say YANBU. He should have fed his child.

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HollyBerryBush · 03/05/2013 21:32

Jesus wept.

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mrsjay · 03/05/2013 21:32

I can see why you are pissed off he is away for a month and you are on your own but you did over react I think

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Tee2072 · 03/05/2013 21:33

You are totally over reacting. Chill. You'll be happier.

Take another day but leave your husband to it. He and the baby will be fine.

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Sirzy · 03/05/2013 21:34

At 8 months, assuming milk was given then a baby doesn't need more than that.

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Ezza1 · 03/05/2013 21:35

Yabu Confused

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HollyBerryBush · 03/05/2013 21:35

Let me think about this.

You left an 8mo with a bloke you see once every 4 weeks, and buggered off for a day having your black heads exfoliated. You come home and start throwing food round and go off for a mini breakdown

Any other thread with a father pitching up once a month to take a baby out for a whole day there would be hell to pay - let alone the whole yogurt fiasco.

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GoingUpInTheWorld · 03/05/2013 21:35

My husband would of done the exact same.

I said to him today that i worry what would happen to dd if something happened to me as hes so inconpetent with her.

If hes changing dds nappy, which isnt often and shes pooed, then he shouts me for help!!

Yanbu!!!

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HumphreyCobbler · 03/05/2013 21:36

I would be annoyed that my DH was so clueless he couldn't think of something more appropriate to feed a baby off his own bat.

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BigBoobiedBertha · 03/05/2013 21:36

I think the issue is him not listening to you rather than the baby not eating what he was supposed to. the baby would have let him know if he were hungry so unless he spent the day howling with hunger YABU about the food.

However, YANBU about losing it with a husband who doesn't bloody listen. I have one of those. They are enough to drive you potty, aren't they? I have to send mine emails about important dates or he claims I never told him. Angry

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Gilberte · 03/05/2013 21:36

YANBU. Why didn't he call you if he didn't know what to give him?

It amazes me how some people have no common sense

Next time I suggest a big note on the fridge!

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VinegarDrinker · 03/05/2013 21:40

At 8 months you'd have been lucky if my DS licked a bit of toast all day. Honestly thus is so much of a non issue it's laughable.

To those posters saying "he didn't feed the poor baby all day" - she got home before dinnertime and he did give the baby a decent amount of yoghurt (plus presumably some milk or I'm sure the OP would have mentioned in her rant).

OP you are exactly the kind of poster who will be back in a couple of years complaining that your DH can't cope with his own DC - yes, because you are micro managing and won't let him!

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CreatureRetorts · 03/05/2013 21:40

Waking once a night? That's nothing.

YABU. Honestly, he fed the baby! He hardly sees the baby - you should've left written instructions. Man alive.

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TartyMcTart · 03/05/2013 21:41

Good God, YABU!

It's just one meal in one day. Your OH is away for 4 weeks at a time, he won't realise how you always do things but he doesnt need you breathing down his neck telling him what he's doing wrong. Leave them be!

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nenevomito · 03/05/2013 21:41

Did he feed the baby? Was the baby screaming hungry?

I can understand why you got hacked off, but if the baby has been fed something and has had its milk and isn't hungry, it really doesn't matter that he didn't use what you'd prepared.

I think the problem is that because you're doing it all the time, you have your way of doing it and he doesn't. I can understand why you're upset, but you are overreacting a bit.

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