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AIBU?

Doing your make up . . if really ill?

51 replies

Thumbtack · 03/05/2013 09:47

I had to send one of the bar staff home yesterday lunchtime, soon after arriving very late for work. She is a young lass and not a bad worker, so no issue with employing her. However I had to (due to health and safety) as she told me she had been physically sick and throwing up all night due to worrying about x, y and z, hence the reason she was late.

But . . , she had a full face of make up on, including false eyelashes and had straightened her hair . .

Am i being a cynical old cow thinking it cant have been that bad if you managed to put on the full works of make up?

I'm a nice boss so its no big deal and of course i'll give her the benefit of the doubt but i was a bit Hmm

Is it possible to be fraught with worry, physically sick and yet able to put false eyelashes on? Maybe I'm just getting old?

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cozietoesie · 03/05/2013 09:48

Are you sure she wasn't coming from a 'night before' and still a tad hungover?

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AllYoursBabooshka · 03/05/2013 09:51

If she does it everyday then yes, it's possible.

I can't imagine it's much fun though.

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Trill · 03/05/2013 09:52

Y might BU

Someone might be feeling rough and so put on makeup to try to "look normal", then get into work and realise that they felt worse than they thought.

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DeepRedBetty · 03/05/2013 09:53

The cynical bit of me thinks she's been on the lash. But if, as you say, she's normally good, I'd accept her story and hope that the hangover is bad enough to make sure she doesn't do it again.

She probably thought putting the makeup on would cover up the traces of debauchery Grin.

Does she get paid for shifts she doesn't in the end do? Might explain lurching in with this story.

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DeepRedBetty · 03/05/2013 09:54

The makeup might equally be to cover up the traces of being up all night in the way she herself describes of course.

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Fuckwittery · 03/05/2013 09:56

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cozietoesie · 03/05/2013 09:57

Yep. The cynical bit of me also.

It's not so much work to freshen up last night's slap a bit and then pour yourself down to work a little late. I would have thought that starting from scratch would have been a bit much if you were really feeling unwell and had been sick all night - much more likely then just to phone in ill.

(Secrets of a mis-spent youth.)

Hopefully her hangover will larn her.

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Locketjuice · 03/05/2013 10:08

I would still do my make up, depending how shit I felt would depend if I slapped some foundation on and half attempted mascara or a full face though Smile

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nicelyneurotic · 03/05/2013 10:10

I would still do it to try to look less scary!

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givemeaboost · 03/05/2013 10:15

Not sure I understand why you had to send her home for being sick, surely there is a difference between vomiting due to illness and vomiting due to pregnancy or due to being anxious....? I would say if she normally wears the sort of makeup she was wearing then I would be inclinced to think shes telling the truth, i have friends who would do similar, if thats their usual face they wouldnt leave the house without applying it.

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CoolaSchmoola · 03/05/2013 10:18

I know plenty of people who wouldn't be seen dead without the full works. I even have a friend who did her face in LABOUR to look 'good' on the photos.

Many people with self esteem issues won't leave the house without the lot on, even when they are as ill as you describe (and worse).

This possibly says far more about how she views herself than how ill she was.

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aldiwhore · 03/05/2013 10:19

I've been a trooper, over done my make-up, over done my hair and been a dedicated employee, only to sit in work an hour later and realise I should be at home in bed.

You say she was up all night being sick through stress? That's not a H&S reason as she has no bug... she probably IS completely knackered and feeling rough though, so you still did the right thing.

If she has form, be suspcious, if she doesn't give her the benefit of the doubt.


I'd sensitive to this at the moment, no one believed my son felt poorly at school, he made himself sick because he thought he needed to show some 'evidence' he's now ill (the other end) and feeling terrible that the school think he's a liar.

You can't win.

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GlassofRose · 03/05/2013 10:22

Unless I'm absolutely dying I try to get on with things because money doesn't grow on trees and the world does not stop. If I'm leaving the house I try to look presentable, which means make up ill or not.

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Thumbtack · 03/05/2013 10:46

I have to err on the side of caution when it comes to actual vomiting (whether ill or stress) as part of duties is to take food to customers, thats why I had to send her back.

I may have been a bit cynical due to my misspent youth as well! I have fond memories of trying to pull a fast one at work.

I guess your all right in the sense that she does take a lot of pride in her appearance and would perhaps rather be seen dead than without make up - bless her, she is a character - okay i'll give her benefit of the doubt Smile

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Mermaidspam · 03/05/2013 11:01

I couldn't wouldn't leave the house with a full face of make up on.

(Stems from having very bad acne as a teen and having both scarring and lingering insecurities).

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tomatoplantproject · 03/05/2013 11:03

I put more make up in when I'm feeling rough, not less. It's a psychological thing that if I pretend I'm fine, and I look nice, then I will feel better. It's the faking it til making it rule.

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LadySlatternlysHoover · 03/05/2013 11:04

I would probably put make up on to try and make myself look almost human but I definitely wouldn't be bothered straightening my hair if I was ill.

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cozietoesie · 03/05/2013 11:06

I'd give her the benefit of the doubt. Youngsters all think we're such fuddy-duddys (if they only knew about our mis-spent youths) so if it did happen to be an 'excuse' I'd overlook it and hope she learned from it.

Smile

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Lj8893 · 03/05/2013 11:14

They are many people espessially the type who wear false eyelashes to work who won't leave the house without a full face of make up, ill or not.

I wouldn't tbh, but i don't tend to wear lots of make up anyway, in fact throughout the first 10 weeks of my pregnancy I didn't put any make up at all because it just seemed so much effort! No one seemed to notice though (or they were just being very polite!!)

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trixymalixy · 03/05/2013 11:18

I don't normally wear make up to work, but if I've been up all night and think I look like death warmed up I am more likely to put make up on if I am dragging myself into work.

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cozietoesie · 03/05/2013 11:23

Now there's your mistake trixy. You don't put so much make up on so as to emphasise your parlous state. Wink

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LookingThroughTheFog · 03/05/2013 11:29

Thumbtack, I work with a number of people with mental health problems. One of them says she knows she's really ill when her clothes, hair and make-up have to be absolutely perfect before she can leave the house. It's a form of displacement to her, and a shield from whatever she's anxious about. I know another who's less extreme, but comments that she feels that there's something she can control, even if it's only how she looks. If she arses it up, she's really upset and showers and starts over. If you add to that how awful you think you might look after a night of vomiting, it's not unusual to go into overdrive.

I'm not saying she wasn't taking the piss; I've never met her, she might well have been hungover and straight out from the night before. However, I've learned to be vary careful when it comes to accepting what does and doesn't constitute typical behaviour for mentally distressed people.

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Thumbtack · 03/05/2013 11:38

Perhaps your right,Fog, as she did say she was being sick from being worried not 'ill-from-a-bug' sick iyswim. Just normal stuff for her age group - boyfriend and uni stuff etc - so yes, perfecting herself in her eyes before she ventures out may be a 'shield'.

But the Miss Marple in me thinks . . or were you just out on the lash Grin

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fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 03/05/2013 11:41

My younger colleagues are constantly off with hangovers so that would make me a bit Hmm tbh.

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PeggyCarter · 03/05/2013 11:42

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