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Aibu to not want dh to cycle home this time of night

(17 Posts)
Christelle2207 Thu 02-May-13 22:39:29

First time AIBU, am 27 weeks pg and a bit hormonal so need to know who IBU.
Dh normally works from home but recently bought a fancy bike and has started cycling to office once or twice a week, 13 miles each way. Am generally keen for him to get out more and also get fitness back so am kind of ok with this, if not delighted.
Anyway, tonight he went to see his brother after work, 3 miles further away from work so 16 miles to home. I did know his plans but he said he would only be dropping in then coming back- as it happened he left brother's house at 9.45 so am expecting him back after 11pm.
He is a good careful cyclist with lights, high viz jacket etc. however not so worried about his cycling as I am about idiots out there on the roads this time of night.
These 16 miles are across south Manchester suburbia, through some very mixed areas.
Before he met me he was knocked over by his bike and taken to hospital by ambulance, twice (not at fault either time). I should add that we only have one car, which I normally take to work, so there is no other easy option for him to get between a, b and c- public transport options useless. Normally when he goes to see db he waits for me to get home then takes car. He chose to go to office by bike today and it would be daft to cycle all the way home then drive back over hence why he's cycling back now.

AIBU to give him a bit of grief when he gets back for cycling back so late? He knows I'm worried but thinks it's my problem. Is it?

ThePendant Thu 02-May-13 22:41:48

I regularly cycle late at night.
Safer than rush hour IMO

TravelinColour Thu 02-May-13 22:43:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Christelle2207 Thu 02-May-13 22:57:35

Hmm so IABU! But would you guys cycle 16 miles at this time?
He will almost certainly be sober.

whois Thu 02-May-13 23:00:27

I prefer biking home at night. Fewer cars and bikes and the lights seem to be more in my favour. Although perhaps that's just bias!

He'll be fine with lights and high vis

squeakytoy Thu 02-May-13 23:01:40

less traffic, less lorries about at this time of night.. so it is probably much safer than at many other times..

GladbagsGold Thu 02-May-13 23:05:53

Much easier to spot other road users at night as contrast is greater. YABU but understandably so - it feels like it should be more dangerous at night even though its not.

ThePendant Thu 02-May-13 23:07:25

I wouldn't cycle 16 miles at any time of day or night smile

But I'll happily do my usually commute at any time of day/night as long as I'm not too tired/pissed. Rush hour is by far the most dangerous time to be a cyclist.

UniS Thu 02-May-13 23:23:27

Yep, I used to cycle across london at that time of night or later. safer than walking or bus.

ComposHat Fri 03-May-13 01:20:05

I am just about to set off home now. I'll be riding through some of the supposedly roughest areas of Liverpool.

I hate riding in rush hour, there's hardly any space on the roads and it feels like a matter of time before some careless sod swipes you off the bike.

In the wee small hours the roads are virtually empty, no one is about and you are able to see potentially iffy situations early and scarper quick smart.

I feel far safer than on the bus and if anyone is daft enough to try and confront me, they 'll come off worse after being clobbered by a hefty piece of metal travelling at 20mph.

He will be fine.

musicposy Fri 03-May-13 01:21:59

DH cycles to and from the train / coach station at very weird hours, like 3am and 11.30pm.
It is only 4 miles, but he used to do 12 to work a few years back and I never thought anything of it.
Only trouble he's had has been people thieving bits off the bike while he's at work at night.

Justforlaughs Fri 03-May-13 08:56:37

Dh also cycles 12 miles to work everyday and often cycles home later than this along both country roads and main roads. I don't worry unless he has been drinking, in which case I insist that I pick him up.

DukeSilver Fri 03-May-13 09:02:20

I regularly cycled at that time of night when I was 27 weeks pregnant grin

As long as he has good lights and hi-vis then he is being very safe.

Smartieaddict Fri 03-May-13 09:05:02

I'm afraid YABU, he is an adult and should be able to choose what risks he wants to take in life, just as he should respect your choices.

Trill Fri 03-May-13 09:07:43

Sober cycling with lights and a high vis jacket, doing a distance that he cycles regularly?


It is no darker at 11pm now than it is at 7pm in winter, so "time of night" is not really relevant.

Christelle2207 Fri 03-May-13 09:21:00

thanks all. He got back fine. Clearly IABU - maybe pregnancy hormones playing up.

DukeSilver Fri 03-May-13 09:54:05

That's good Christelle.

I always find it easier to be the one doing the slightly worrisome activity that to be the one waiting at home for someone to return grin

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