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to think "requesting" vouchers on a child's party invite is the height of RUDENESS

(71 Posts)
mamma12 Sun 28-Apr-13 21:43:35

invitation reads NO PRESENTS PLEASE ONLY VOUCHERS FROM (a particular shop) maybe I' old fashioned but surely this is quite grabby and rude. I don't understand how, even if you want vouchers from a particular shop, you would be that un-self-aware you wouldn't think this comes accross as overdemanding. Also it means I can grt some old reduced tat for a fiver er herm takes the pleasure out of a child opening a present. Maybe its just me. To put things into context this mum also bans all christmas presents but asks for contributions to her child's ISA account. sigh. I don't think IBU to find this so annoying I want to spontaniously combust midly irritating angry

mrsjay Sun 28-Apr-13 21:46:00

I would get a present tbh I know they want vouchers for a particualar toy probably but I would hate to get a 'gift request' for a kids birthday yanbu, I can see the point if it is a relative but nah it is rude imo

ChazDingle Sun 28-Apr-13 21:46:23

yes i think that is cheeky too and you are no BU. Not sure what i'd do, prob end up giving vouchers anyway, or you could just give a pressie if you want to- can't see her handing it back

TheCrackFox Sun 28-Apr-13 21:47:24


The child in question clearly has too many toys - I would buy a colouring book and crayons from Poundland.

HoHoHoNoYouDont Sun 28-Apr-13 21:53:24

If the child has too many toys I would rather ask for donations to a local kids charity.

SanityClause Sun 28-Apr-13 21:53:41

It is rude.

Sometimes parents ask what your child would like, and that would be the opportunity to request the vouchers.

cinnamonbun Sun 28-Apr-13 21:53:43

YANBU. I think it's cheeky and it would never occur to me to do the same, although sometimes I do think "what a shame" when DD receives something she already has (or similar) or something she won't play with for whatever reason. But that's what eBay's for smile

TheChaoGoesMu Sun 28-Apr-13 21:56:28

It is rude.

Snoopingforsoup Sun 28-Apr-13 21:57:29

Just get a gift and ignore the request. That's outrageous.
I actually remember someone I know hand out a John Lewis gift list for her baby shower!
She's a grabbing cow too! In fact, it's possibly her kids' party thinking about it...
Some people are utter knobheads!

mrsjay Sun 28-Apr-13 21:58:22

will be amazon wishlists in invites next hmm

Karoleann Sun 28-Apr-13 21:59:56

I really don't like it either, we have £'s please on invites.
I just get a present, I'm not willing to give money (and I wouldn't want dc1/2/3 to get one either).

MummaBubba123 Sun 28-Apr-13 22:01:13

Laughing! Brilliant!
I actually think its practical and genius of the mum to ask for vouchers - sorry. But I know I'm possibly alone here.
HOWEVER, if the same mum asked for contributions to child's ISA account, I'd intentionally not be disposed to doing birthday vouchers either! That's hilaaaaaaarious! Still laughing!!! Husband is asking me what's so funny.
If you all give birthday invitations I'd hope she tells her child that whatever she chooses is a 'gift from the class'/ whoever!?

Xmasbaby11 Sun 28-Apr-13 22:02:40

That is disgusting! If they don't need anything, they should specify no presents.

MrsBungle Sun 28-Apr-13 22:03:14

YANBU. Very rude.

MummaBubba123 Sun 28-Apr-13 22:05:19

Vouchers - not 'invitations'.
It's late (for me).

I asked for vouchers for my son this year. Got voted out (suggested it at start of year for all children whose parents preferred it for their child.
People felt that at 5, children prefer to open 30-40 individual pressies. They have a point.
So I bought what I'd had my eye on for him myself.
And there's a huge pile of double presents, pass-ons and gd knows what in our garage ;)

MummaBubba123 Sun 28-Apr-13 22:06:30

Seems such a waste of people's money (and space). Still would like to do vouchers thing in future and send photo / thank you emailed video of him playing with class pressie.

NorthernLurker Sun 28-Apr-13 22:06:55

That is very rude. The correct thing is to not mention presents and if asked specify small and modest things that your dc likes. It was dd3's party last weekend and quite a few parents asked me. I said small piece of playmobil, 'history' type book and 'something arty'. Dd got some lovely presents smile. That's part of the fun of having a party with school friends. You get some surprises!

EhricLovesTeamQhuay Sun 28-Apr-13 22:07:12

It's bloody rude is what it is.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Sun 28-Apr-13 22:07:26

Very rude and grabby.

Vouchers are a great present for kids but you can't 'ask' for them upfront.

DumSpiroSpero Sun 28-Apr-13 22:10:37

It's very off, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't wish I had the balls to do it tbh.

radicalsubstitution Sun 28-Apr-13 22:13:06

YANBU. I would buy a present (if you go to the party).

That's what we do when we are given the standard 'don't buy present, give us cash/vounchers' requests that are indiscriminately handed out by some people in their wedding invitations.

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Sun 28-Apr-13 22:15:24

My DS was in a small school with a single class in each year. I am not sure how it came about but it soon ended up that nearly every present exchanged was for an identically valued gift voucher from the same store. It WAS fantastic. I bulk bought a stack of vouchers. It was so easy and I knew the recipients would appriciate them.
A few invitees would still get toys or books so the birthday kid still had a few presents to unwrap on the day.

However, noone ever asked for the vouchers.

Nobhead Sun 28-Apr-13 22:16:20

Fucking outrageous! Fine for a wedding not for a kids birthday. They would be getting a B and M bargains toy the same as every other kid gets. Rude and grabby.....cheeky fuckers.

Molehillmountain Sun 28-Apr-13 22:18:55

Whilst it makes huge good sense, it's incredibly rude and presumptuous to specify something like vouchers. It wouldn't work for me-I buy party gifts when I see suitable things in sales and on offer. They're always (I think) appropriate but never full price.

awkwardsis Sun 28-Apr-13 22:20:55

yanbu. Ds had an invitation to a party a few months ago where the invitation said 'no presents but there will be a penny pot'. My eye roll was evident from space, and we were busy that day. So so rude.

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