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To be pissed off PIL looked after baby while I was at work and left me with upset, screaming child

(215 Posts)
Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:16:57

At work this mornin so was dh but he was with dc most of time. Apparently he thought pil did fab jobplayin with dc and really stimulating him. I came home to a screaming tired underfed baby who needed a full outfit change. This was one of the first times they had dc and I had left instructions which they did seem to attempt to follow. Dh can't seem to understand why I think they are useless AIBU???

Footface Mon 29-Apr-13 15:21:09

I think you have control issues, rather than a lazy dh. He doesn't change nappies, I wonder if that's because in your eyes he can't do it right.

You lucky your pil/ mum are interested in your ds. In 20tears time you will be the position of you pil. Imaging how involved you would like to be, snd treat them that way

alwayslateforwork Mon 29-Apr-13 14:08:26

Blimey, Kate. You took your time!

mrsjay Mon 29-Apr-13 10:40:17

his was one of the first times they had dc and I had left instructions which they did seem to attempt to follow. Dh can't seem to understand why I think they are useless AIBU???

they are grandparents not flipping robots are you taking the piss, seriously

CoffeeChocolateWine Mon 29-Apr-13 10:25:50

YABU, but I do remember with my PFB it would get to me a bit when my DS was perfect and happy all day when his routine was right (ie. when he was with me!) and damn hard work, crying and irritable and not knowing what to do with himself when it was wrong (ie. when not with me).

But it was probably you not being there that threw everything out the window, not something your PIL did wrong so it's very unfair to say they are useless. And it was their first time and they did their best and tried to follow your instructions, but you not being there unsettled him so he didn't sleep as long as he usually does and he didn't eat as well as he usually does. I do understand it's frustrating when you are the person who has to deal with the overtired and irritable baby but you just have to accept that that's going to happen sometimes if you leave him with someone else.

So yes, YABU but a part of me understands your frustration because I've felt it too in the past.

Re your DH, nappies aside is he a good dad in other ways or is all of it left to you? Or are you the type of mum that just does everything herself? My brother refuses to do his DC's nappies too but in every other way he is an amazing dad and an amazing uncle to my DC. But he doesn't do nappies!

YoniMeKateMumsnet (MNHQ) Mon 29-Apr-13 10:14:45

Morning all,

We'd like to remind you that troll hunting is against our talk guidelines. We'll be going through the thread and deleting any posts that breaks the GL.

alwayslateforwork Mon 29-Apr-13 07:33:08

You two are terrible. For entirely different reasons. grin

freddiemisagreatshag Mon 29-Apr-13 04:51:55

<Staggers in. >

Realises she has to be up for work in 3 ours.

Damn. It. Was. Worth. It.

Happy sigh.

Goodnight ladies.

Sheshelob Sun 28-Apr-13 23:57:05

I did. Still would.

I may need help.

<sobs quietly to self while repeated checking Donovan picture>

alwayslateforwork Sun 28-Apr-13 23:47:51

<sneaks back to see if Freddie comes home, and if sheshe plucks up enough courage to get an eyeful of the Jason in the cold light of day>

Awks Sun 28-Apr-13 11:42:24

James Martin is a bit of a player, that I DO know smile

minniemagoo Sun 28-Apr-13 11:29:51

Tbh I think you are doing your DC a disservice in the long run. I get the impression you have limited the time your Dh and his parents have had with your dc. They need to learn his routine, habits too. Of course your mum is going to be better in your eyes if she has had more contact. Its a learning curve. The GP/GC relationship can be as fantastic one and aI do feel it is a patents responsibility to try to build the best one possible. Give them a break, you may come to appreciate the extra break. Don't react to this setback, put effort into making it better next time. Maybe less rules, focus on one part of dcs routine for therm tho stick to.

DukeSilver Sun 28-Apr-13 11:07:20

WTF?? Doesn't do nappy changing and you thought that was normal?! confused

It is so utterly and completely not normal.

HappyMummyOfOne Sun 28-Apr-13 11:00:51

YABVU, PIL did you a favour and you are still moaning despite having childcare on tap so you can go out and away without your child.

Your DH should be doing far more but its hard to tell if he is lazy or you dont let him. Or perhaps given the amount of time your child is with others there simply arent many opportunities for him to do one to one care.

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 10:10:01

Good morning all grin

Well Hellooooooo Dave

Sheshelob Sun 28-Apr-13 09:44:38

<wakes up with driest mouth and loudest child known to mankind>

Daren't look at Jason Donovan this morning. I feel like he's the end of night snog I need to forget.

WellJustCallHimDave Sun 28-Apr-13 09:12:10

Did someone mention Sean Bean?

* Eyes light up *

Freddiem, I told you I'd stalk you. wink

alwayslateforwork Sun 28-Apr-13 01:21:41

Ah, a re-run. Have fun x

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 01:11:40

blush I know. But he's sweet and he's kind and the sex is amazing I treated him like crap the last time blush

alwayslateforwork Sun 28-Apr-13 01:08:57

You know I'm going to have to come back tomorrow night and see if you got home? You can't post tomorrow, that way we'll still be on tenterhooks...

Coffee to takeaway at his is a pretty big leap! I'd say he wasn't planning on you making it home...

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 01:01:28

I'm nervous blush we went for coffee last week and it was soooo nice and I got a snog

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 01:00:18

I'd do James May and the Hamster in that red carpet pic Yoni

YoniMontana Sun 28-Apr-13 00:59:38

Hope your date goes well Freddie ;)

YoniMontana Sun 28-Apr-13 00:58:49

I aim to please grin
That magazine thing was clever. I like it!

freddiemisagreatshag Sun 28-Apr-13 00:58:16

grin I haven't decided yet if I'm staying over tomorrow or coming home What kind of girl do you think I am wink I'll be gutted if I come home

alwayslateforwork Sun 28-Apr-13 00:57:18

Does he look good nekkid in a pinny?

Or is that part 3? grin

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