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to cancel tonights offer, based on no reply to my text.

(22 Posts)
delayedresponse Wed 24-Apr-13 06:33:08

Have been seeing this guy, and we were trying to sort out a 4th date. He is busy towards the end of the week when im free and ive been busy the early half. I said i would see if i could shuffle things about for tonight and would let him know. Its not a great day for me as im travelling with work all day and am shattered and very busy, but its better than nothing.

So, i text him at about 7ish last night saying if he wanted to come over for dinner ( so i need to know so i can get food) then hes welcome to...and asking if he did manage to shift anything around later in the week like he said he was going to try to do.

Ive not had any reply. Im out all day ( which he knows) and am unconctable. Aibu to just cancel now?

CaffeDoppio Wed 24-Apr-13 06:35:45

You can't cancel something that doesn't exist and really - if it all hangs on you needing to do shopping why don't you just ring him? Texts do go astray, he may not have looked at his phone - anything really.
Or it might be he's just not that into you?

delayedresponse Wed 24-Apr-13 06:41:13

He didnt have an issue with his texts monday when he was trying to get to see me

Snog Wed 24-Apr-13 06:43:38

You need to ring not text in this situation

maddening Wed 24-Apr-13 06:44:23

Does it make a difference right now ? If you will get home an hour before you suggested he came round then if he has replied yes during the day then get ready and if no reply cancel it and relax?

I would let him know you won't see his reply till x time.

christinarossetti Wed 24-Apr-13 06:45:38

I think 4th date is a bit soon to be putting yourself out by cooking at your home after a long day travelling tbh.

I would text to say this evening's off as you'll be too tired and try to plan something when you've both got time rather than squeezing each other in.

thistlelicker Wed 24-Apr-13 06:46:30

Don't go food shopping! If he turns up get take away?

TheRealFellatio Wed 24-Apr-13 06:52:58

I would text him again saying 'sorry, don't know whether you got my last text or not re: dinner at mine tonight, but as I haven't heard from you I'm retracting the offer. I have a busy day ahead and I can't face cooking at the last minute. Hope you are well. Perhaps seen you soon.


TheRealFellatio Wed 24-Apr-13 06:56:06

see, not seen

bigbuttons Wed 24-Apr-13 07:06:15

I think you are trying too hard with this man. let him do some of the running now.

SamuelWestsMistress Wed 24-Apr-13 07:07:55

4th date and he's already managed to piss you off? Not a good sign I don't think.

KenDoddsDadsDog Wed 24-Apr-13 07:08:43

If he shows up get takeaway!

Tailtwister Wed 24-Apr-13 07:11:16

I wouldn't bother texting at all. If he contacts you later just say that you had assumed he wasn't coming since he hadn't confirmed one way or the other. Then I would just stop running after him. If he wants another date let him work for it.

delayedresponse Wed 24-Apr-13 07:22:45

im not texting him again to chase him up, im not running after any man, like you say, too much effort too early, and if he wanted to see me he can bloody make some effort and not leave me hanging on.

it does kind of matter that i know now, im not 20 with no responsibilities, i need to sort the child out, sort my legs out and then sort the house out, these things dont happen by magic.

delayedresponse Wed 24-Apr-13 07:33:34

hes text and asked me out saturday instead. result!

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Wed 24-Apr-13 07:39:07

What time did he text? Bit rude to leave you all day waiting.

kukeslala Wed 24-Apr-13 10:18:55


The point of texts to me is they are non urgent and can be replied to at a suitable time for you.
You gave him 12hrs (overnight) OP, to reply to a text, and Im assuming some of those he would be asleep.
If it was all loose, like your post indicates, I would see if I could shuffle things about and let him know.
YABU to think he would keep himself free, when you confirm just 24hrs before the day, and to expect a reply within 12 hrs!

Good luck with the date Sat.

MsVestibule Wed 24-Apr-13 10:31:09

I found the worst thing about dating in the noughties was bloody texting. So much room for ambiguity and allows selfish tossers (not saying your new man is one, BTW) to get away with murder.

TigerSwallowTail Wed 24-Apr-13 10:32:55

I'm assuming he's text between 7.22 and 7.33 this morning neomaxi so he hasn't left her all day waiting without contacting her, I wasn't even out of bed at that time, I'd say that was quite early tbh grin.

Good luck on Saturday OP, I hope you enjoy yourself.

everlong Wed 24-Apr-13 10:34:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

delayedresponse Wed 24-Apr-13 12:36:33

Nope, the text was sent in the evening, so he had left it rather a long time.

I wouldnt go home and wait in my pjs and not care if he turned up, i hardly know him, its different to it being a long term friend or boyfriend, its a 4th date, far too early to see me in the bath or wearing a towell!!

TigerSwallowTail Wed 24-Apr-13 13:23:28

You text him last night and he replied first thing this morning, is that right? I don't see anything wrong with that tbh.

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