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AIBU?

To think that breast feeding tops should be a bit more forgiving?

31 replies

BonaDea · 23/04/2013 13:00

Ds is 5 weeks old and I'm ebf'ing. I know that I should just wear normal tops with a vest underneath, and for the most part I have been and will continue to do so.

But none of my pre preg tops really fit or are long enough and I didn't have huge amounts of maternity gear. Together with the fact that I needed some cheering up I thought I'd buy a couple of nursing tops to make feeding in public a bit less nerve wracking.

What I've found is that most of these tops are made of Lycra or other stretchy fabric and are skin tight. In other words they cling in all the wrong places and look horrible. Went to John Lewis and tried several options - either tents or skin tight as described.

Then went on verbaudet website and ordered a few bits which looked much more flattering - more drapey and forgiving. I was a 12-14 pre preg with a decent shape. Obviously I am pretty lumpy and bumpy at the moment but have been able to get myself looking not too bad wearing the clothes that do fit me but the things which arrived this morning look awful!

I ordered size 16 and sort of expected that some consideration might be given to cut and fabric to make the tops flattering. What looked drapey and flattering (on the size 6 model on the website - another gripe!) is literally skin tight on me and looks hideous around the tummy.

I would have thought that bf clothes weren't just about providing easy access to boobs, but also about making women who are feeling pretty body conscious feel better about themselves?!

Am I deluded/ unreasonable?

OP posts:
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CocacolaMum · 23/04/2013 13:02

are you sure you aren't bigger than a 16?

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OpheliasWeepingWillow · 23/04/2013 13:05

Yes, are you wearing the right size?

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BonaDea · 23/04/2013 13:08

Good question! I'm pretty sure I'm not- have been able to fit into pre-preg size 14 tops okay - they are just too short or not quite easy enough to lift up for feeding for me to wear.

The tops basically 'fit' in the sense that they are not over stretched on me. If I was the same size I am now but less 'bumpy' they would look fine in the sense that Lycra tops are tight. I just wonder how many bf'ing women want figure hugging?!

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Bringbring · 23/04/2013 13:17

My ds is 6 weeks. Breastfeeding tops are horrible, who wants to post their tits through a tiny hole! Nevermind that maternity/nursing clothes are the frumpiest of the frumpiest!

Stupidly I bought maternity clothes/dresses with high necks so I can't wear these now!

I've kitted myself out in stretchy or cottony wrap or mock wrap dresses, try A Wear on asos, with nursing bras and best tops. I'm the same size as you but I'm feeling more like myself now. With a nice scarf I can discretely get my tits out anywhere.

And today, with the sun shining and my shades on pushing the pram today I think I got a few admiring glanced (bit vain but it's been ages since I've felt remotely attractive!)

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Eskino · 23/04/2013 13:17

Steer clear of breastfeeding wear! Its all horrible.

You said it, a long vest top (Primark £2.50) with a sloppy tshirt over.

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Bringbring · 23/04/2013 13:18

To sum up, ditch maternity/nursing wear - its shit!

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ipswichwitch · 23/04/2013 13:22

Glad it's not just me then! Frankly I was glad to have had DS in the winter months so I could at least cover up with layers but by god I felt like a sack of potatoes most days! Currently expecting DC2 and it seems that maternity/bf clothes are no better than last time. I used to buy super long vest tops/vest dresses and wear a loose floaty shirt over the top

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ipswichwitch · 23/04/2013 13:22

H&M are good for long vests by the way

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BedHanger · 23/04/2013 13:24

I have a load of H&M £3.99 tops (they are clingy!) with a slit cut just under each boob. Then I put a looser wrap dress over the top. Agree that most nursing stuff is incredibly unflattering, plus I do. Not. Wear. Trousers, which limits me even more!

That said, I did get given a very nice Jo Jo Maman Bebe dress that's flattering and practical. Almost unheard of!

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louschmoo · 23/04/2013 13:25

Yep, nursing clothes are generally shit. Vest under a loose-ish top is easy. Or if you just want to wear whatever you fancy then get a nursing cover, would cost the same as a nursing top but you only wear it when feeding instead of all day. And you can then wear anything you like (apart from shift dresses I suppose). Lots of people on here seem to dislike them but they are great if you don't want to live in baggy tshirts.

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GrandPoohBah · 23/04/2013 13:28

I do the two top thing, or a wrap dress. I haven't bought any nursing wear, it's all fugly.

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Icanhasnickname · 23/04/2013 15:29

How about <a class="break-all" href="//www.amazon.co.uk/Feed-ME-Breastfeeding-Perfect-Plum/dp/B007R3GZCK?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">this

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anastaisia · 23/04/2013 16:32

I have some lovely things from Seraphine that aren't clingy (some of their things are though) but full price they're quite expensive. All the things I've got were bought on sale or on Ebay.

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Tailtwister · 23/04/2013 17:34

I would go for a strappy top under your normal clothes tbh. I did like the Bravado breastfeeding tank tops which have an integrated bra. However, they are expensive and not essential.

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Isandri · 23/04/2013 19:07

I recommend bystroom. It's a danish brand and drapes all over the place. I'm breastfeeding and except for a milker dress everything I have is by bystroom. It's stretchy jersey with a fitter underlayer that you pull up or move to the side and a draped overlayed.

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roseum · 23/04/2013 20:39

I second Seraphine. I got tops/ dresses that were for both maternity and breast-feeding. Meant they were suitably loose immediately post-birth. They still look good now, 14months after PFB arrived. They also don't tend to go for the silly nipple-slits with a cover that a lot of the other breast-feeding clothes often have, instead they tend to have clever drapes, that pull apart neatly (and cover a lot of the top of your boob as well when feeding). I have this in purple, and this in a couple of colours, and thoroughly recommend them.

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Kittykatzen · 23/04/2013 20:45

If you want specific breast feeding clothes then Frugi are ok in the forgiving department (not sure about stylish but pretty enough) and I've just bought a Breton striped feeding dress from JojoMamanBebe that has been nothing short of miraculous for my figure - have had lots of compliments on it. Otherwise I stick to the two layer technique or use my cover up to save everyone from my lumps and bumps.

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Theyoniwayisnorthwards · 23/04/2013 20:57

There's a Swedish (I think) company called BOOB that do nursing tops including a nice baggy hoody. The opening is underneath not the 'peekaboo' style of jojo Maman bebe and others I've seen. I wear one of their tops under a floaty shirt or a waterfall cardigan that I can kind of wrap baby up in when feeding.

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PurplePidjin · 23/04/2013 21:04

Vest top under cotton shirt here. Skims over the bits you'd rather hide, loose enough to be cool in warmer weather, and just ping the vest back over your bra cup at the end if when you forget to do the buttons up!

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LoganMummy · 23/04/2013 21:08

I went with some breastfeeding Emma Jane vests - large boob holes and hold tummy in slightly - underneath loose tops.

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dietcokeandwine · 23/04/2013 21:20

I have various nursing tops which are quite flattering and not fugly at all...though agree that there's a LOT of foul stuff out there. Personally I like the jojomamanbebe tops / dresses and have bought quite a lot from them. Even wore one to a party and got compliments on it with no-one knowing it was a feeding top Grin

I've tried doing the vest under a loose top thing but I just don't find it comfortable - I get too hot wearing two layers and find it far too awkward juggling the nursing bra/vest top/additional top as well...

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MrsLyman · 23/04/2013 21:39

BFing spefic clothes are as a general rule horrible. If you're struggling to get clothes long enough try the tall section of places like Top Shop an Dorothy Perkins for vests and t-shirts.

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TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 23/04/2013 21:44

Jojo or Mamaway I found ok.

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Tinuviel · 23/04/2013 22:53

I remember a friend finding a breastfeeding dress (can't remember if it was Vertbaudet) 15 years ago - £55 and dry clean only! Needless to say, she didn't buy it. Found another but it had really thin shoulder straps - not very pretty over nursing bra straps.

Do designers actually know anything about breastfeeding/leaking/nursing bras?

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Lora1982 · 24/04/2013 00:20

You've made me go shopping when i should be trying to sleep!

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