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HELP! Police at my door - apparently I have committed an offence.........

(651 Posts)
TheAccused Sat 20-Apr-13 16:20:36

Police just came as they have received a complaint against me.

Yesterday afternoon I nip to Tesco after school pick up. No P&C spaces so I park further down in a row of which is almost all empty spaces. I have a large 7 seater (4 DC) and get fed up of people parking so close that I can't get the toddler into his car seat without a struggle, so I park a quarter way over the next space hoping no one will park in that space as there are plenty more empty spaces next to it. I rush round, get a call from DD as she has forgotten her keys and is waiting outside the front door at home, so go quicker, get outside and find some BUFFOON has parked in the space I have parked over, so close that I can only just about get the door open on the toddler's side. The next space was empty!

As a see this, I hold my hands up and say to the DC, 'For gods sake, why did this idiot have to park so close' not seeing that there is a teenage boy sat in the car. I was not actually talking TO him at that point.

Conversation then goes something like this:
Boy shouts out 'my dad parked it not me'. I say something like, 'well you should tell him that I parked like this so I could get my child in car, now I can't, he could have parked further along'. He says' you should'nt have parked over the line'. I tell him I can park where I like, there's no law against it. He says 'well we can park where we like as well'. I tell him it would be common decency for his father to make sure the next car can open their doors. As I am in a rush, I try to squeeze DS through the door, hitting his head in the process. He starts crying. The boy in the next car laughs. I take the trolley back muttering 'tosser' to myself and give him an evil stare as I drive off furious at myself for not parking in the middle of 2 spaces and for even having a dialogue with the boy.

So police just came and said I had committed a public disorder offence as I was 'shouting, screaming and swearing' at the boy which has left him very shaken as he suffers from anxiety. The boy wants a written apology from me and if I do that, it will not go any further. Otherwise I will have be interviewed and give a written statement.

I have said that I am not apologising as I have not committed any offence and the boy was mouthing back to me very confidently and did definitely not look anxious to me! I do actually suffer from anxiety and depression and this has completely knocked me for 6.

The police will call me to arrange an interview next week. I can't believe it. I am pretty sure I did not even raise my voice. There was no one else about except my DCs and they are adamant I did not shout or swear (I have even started doubting myself). I am going back to the store on Monday to request the CCTV footage but they are not sure if anything will show up in the car park and it probably won't have picked up my voice anyway to prove I was not shouting.

I cannot understand how the police can tell me that if I write an apology, they will drop it, when they have no proof that I did anything. They were making out I was guilty angry. Does this constitute a public disorder offence? I was just about to go out with the DCs to park before the police came. I am frozen with fear now.

imour Sat 20-Apr-13 16:40:57

why have you got he right to park where you like just because you are in a rush , same can go for anyone then ,surely its common decency to park properly in the first place , if someone argued with my kid about my parking then they had better hope they were not there when i came back or they would have more than the police to worry about .

Sparklingbrook Sat 20-Apr-13 16:40:59

pouffe that is so sad. sad

YY to not writing the letter-you could get a criminal record. confused

AKissIsNotAContract Sat 20-Apr-13 16:41:04

You might want to check you haven't been posted on here

butterfliesinmytummy Sat 20-Apr-13 16:41:27

File a counter complaint about a parent leaving a minor suffering from anxiety alone in a parked car...

MrsMacFarlane Sat 20-Apr-13 16:42:01

No "offence" has been committed though. I've already replied in this thread but am beginning to think it's a trolly wind up.

magimedi Sat 20-Apr-13 16:42:16

Are you sure they were police? I'm not being funny - but it all seems a little odd to me. I wonder if boy's Dad had access to police & found your address that way?

I would seek legal advice before doing anything else - I really would.

BuggerLumpsAnnoyed Sat 20-Apr-13 16:42:16

Well I'm still amazed and think you were wrong on every level.

LineRunner Sat 20-Apr-13 16:42:31

The Police do not get involved in civil matters.

How very odd.

Guitargirl Sat 20-Apr-13 16:42:54

Park your car properly or get a car that you can park properly.

Do food shopping online.

Stop mouthing off at teenagers you don't know in carparks.

If you don't want this to drag on and your anxiety to worsen write the letter of apology.

storytopper Sat 20-Apr-13 16:43:44

I am shocked that the police are asking you to write a letter of apology without even hearing your side of the story first - or are accepting the boy's word as gospel.

I think you should try to get some legal advice on this.

Guitargirl Sat 20-Apr-13 16:44:25

And by the way that space you said was empty next to him might not have been empty when he actually parked there. It always amazes me when drivers fail to realise that.

This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever read.

People park wrong all the time. Does that mean its ok that someone parks in the next space blocking their doors? I am not sure it does.

Like father like son I say. The father chose that space because he is a pendantic arsehole and the son had the police called because hes his fathers son.

Do not write an apology. Let the police prove that you are guilty. This is so ridiculous.

ivykaty44 Sat 20-Apr-13 16:45:22

I am shocked that they have the time to come to your home when you have not committed an offence to ask you to write a letter of apology. Dp they not have criminals round your way to deal with?

Bays in car parks are often to small and I have parked before now next to someone in a last space in the car park type situation, only to come out and find the cars all around me gone and leaving me looking like a right wally that I can't park

storytopper Sat 20-Apr-13 16:45:22

By the way - I'm not condoning the way you parked - you were out of order with that.

DilysPrice Sat 20-Apr-13 16:45:33

Mumsnetters regularly claim that they deliberately head for the person who has put their bag on a train seat (or who is sitting on an aisle seat to block a window seat) even if there are other seats free, just to make a point. Sounds like the father was playing the same game, and hence had decided you were a twat beforehand. No advice I'm afraid except the usual reminder, which is Never Accept a Caution Without Legal Advice, though I hope it doesn't get that far.

HumphreyCobbler Sat 20-Apr-13 16:45:33

I would not be writing that letter. I can honestly say that I have never parked across two bays (I drive a v small car) but if there were plenty of spaces I cannot see the problem.

The man involved is probably one of those strange people that get a kick out of confrontation.

TenBitSailor Sat 20-Apr-13 16:45:45

I love the way the police are dealing with a playground fracas like a playground fracas.

Write a letter of apology and be done with it or would you prefer a detention and lines?

Salmotrutta Sat 20-Apr-13 16:46:46

The more I think about this the odder it seems.

If this is real, then my money's on the parent claiming to be a witness. And some embellishment on his and the boys part.

tiggytape Sat 20-Apr-13 16:46:50

No "offence" has been committed

Actually words or actions that cause a person alarm or distress is a criminal act not a civil one (public order offence)

Sparklingbrook Sat 20-Apr-13 16:47:20

See him in court.

NumTumDeDum Sat 20-Apr-13 16:47:54

If you make the apology you are essentially admitting the offence. You have no guarantee it will be dropped and could end up with a caution. It would be worth a quick call to a local solicitor.

TheAccused Sat 20-Apr-13 16:47:59

What exactly is the problem with parking over the line into another bay if there are plenty of other empty ones? Yes, I have a larger car and a large toddler to get into a car seat. If the spaces are not wide enough, why should'nt I park over if there are plenty of spaces left? Please explain?

No it's not anyone's else's problem if I can't get my toddler into my car and it's not mine if someone has to park 5ft over hmm. Absolute ignorance.

Anyway as I writing out this post, the police have just called and said the boy is not prepared to make a statement so they are not taking it any further. So they knock on my door and accuse me of an offence completely shitting me up, then just drop it angry. Why complain if they are going to see it through? Unbelievable.

He is 15 apparently.

MadBusLady Sat 20-Apr-13 16:48:23

the boy was mouthing back to me very confidently and did definitely not look anxious to me! I do actually suffer from anxiety and depression and this has completely knocked me for 6.

Well whatever you decide to do/say, don't say shitty things like this.

VivaLeBeaver Sat 20-Apr-13 16:48:46

Yy, write a note saying "I'm very sorry you've felt the need to lie to the police over this matter"

PaddingtonBearsDuffleCoat Sat 20-Apr-13 16:49:01

Parking issues aside,it sounds to me like the police want to deal with this by way of a caution. This can only be done if the person accepts that they were guilty of an offence. There are a variety of Public Order offences which include causing a person to feel 'harassment, alarm or distress' and using 'threatening words and/or behaviour.They may try and charge you with one of these after the interview. If you do not feel that your conduct was out of order then deny any wrongdoing. If you attend the police station DO have a solicitor with you. If you don't contact one yourself you should be offered the services of one at the police station but the standard of solicitor varies so you would be best finding your own. You need one who specialises in criminal law.

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