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AIBU to be a little concerned about this photographer?

(40 Posts)
BlastAndDalmatians Fri 19-Apr-13 18:23:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TenBitSailor Fri 19-Apr-13 18:27:00

Why on earth would it bother you? He's a photographer, not the groom.

lborolass Fri 19-Apr-13 18:30:12

If you're worried that he might not do a good job for any reason I'd keep looking, you'll probably have enough to worry about without adding to it.

Do you have to decide right away or could you keep him as a possible and keep looking?

CableCrest Fri 19-Apr-13 18:30:43

It's not very professional.

In my early 20s I was with someone who smoked weed constantly (he self diagnosed himself with ADHD? hmm) - I could tell the difference in him as soon as he'd finished.

He would talk absolute crap and get on my nerves so much.

You could always look around for someone else - like a student or someone looking to add to their portfolio.

ReluctantlyBeingYoniMassaged Fri 19-Apr-13 18:30:43

Yes it would. He might be too out of it to bother turning up.

countryhousehotel Fri 19-Apr-13 18:31:33

YANBU. It's unprofessional to come to a meeting about a prospective job smelling of weed. It's like coming stinking of alcohol. It gives out the wrong vibes and would have pissed me off right from the start too because it shows a lack of respect for you and your money! Who cares if he smokes it or not, it's the way he presents himself to you that matters and he could have waited until after your meeting. What kind of photos will he take if he's off his head? I'd tell him you were uncomfortable because he and his friend seemed to be "out of it" and let him know that you're in 2 minds about taking them on for that reason. Perhaps you could negotiate a discount?

TenBitSailor Fri 19-Apr-13 18:37:56

Ah, maybe I'm looking for something different to the rest of you in a photographer. I expect a high proportion of arty types smoke week, and I don't have a problem with that. If you do, fair enough.
I do think that the assumption that he might be 'too out of it to other turning up' is ridiculous, and can only assume that people who make that judgment lead very conservative lives.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Fri 19-Apr-13 18:38:58

You could always look around for someone else - like a student or someone looking to add to their portfolio.

I was going to suggest what CableCrest said.

Whereabouts are you, roughly - can you put a question on your Local MN board for any cheap but good recommendations?

ReluctantlyBeingYoniMassaged Fri 19-Apr-13 18:39:34

Really? I have a very dodgy past! I speak from experience. Weed can make going to work extremely hard.

BlastAndDalmatians Fri 19-Apr-13 18:39:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlastAndDalmatians Fri 19-Apr-13 18:42:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ReluctantlyBeingYoniMassaged Fri 19-Apr-13 18:42:59

It is no different to alcohol, in the respect that it is wrong to turn up to a business meeting stinking of it.
It is different in that it is illegal.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Fri 19-Apr-13 18:44:07

Everyone wants to have great shots as mementoes I appreciate that but tbh asking round my friends, we all agreed a lot of good pictures came from our friends and relations, especially those behind-the-scenes shots that only trusted friends would be present to take anyway.

If your dad has a good eye I would ask him to take some, not so that he feels he misses on your Big Day because he's stuck behind a lens, but enough as back-up.

TenBitSailor Fri 19-Apr-13 18:45:08

Ah, I bet he'll do a great job, don't worry.

The thing is I suppose, even if it is no worse than alcohol (undecided on that personally - they are if fervent and it doesn't suit me at all but far less likely to cause violence etc.), you are hiring him to do a job. That said, he has said he is an amateur. Can you expect the same level of professionalism?

Perhaps it depends on the time of the meeting? After lunch, would you be ok with him turning up with a bit of beer breath? If no, then smelling of weed then maybe could be treated the same! Either at 9am isn't great.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Fri 19-Apr-13 18:45:49

smile It will all work out flowers just as well to do as much as possible well in advance.

TenBitSailor Fri 19-Apr-13 18:46:30

If fervent = different, according to my ipad

piprabbit Fri 19-Apr-13 18:50:12

Can you follow up his references and speak to some recent couples he has worked for?

BlastAndDalmatians Fri 19-Apr-13 18:56:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pixel Fri 19-Apr-13 19:01:17

I'm confused. How can he call himself an amateur if he is charging money for it?

catgirl1976 Fri 19-Apr-13 19:07:31


Creative types.....par for the course

He won't light up in the church I'm sure

BlastAndDalmatians Fri 19-Apr-13 19:08:36

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

piprabbit Fri 19-Apr-13 19:20:13

I would imagine that an amateur might have another 'day' job, with the photography being something extra he does as and when jobs crop up.

In fact, that might be reassuring, if you could find out what his actual job is, it might influence how you feel about him. It might be something very responsible and important (you never know grin).

HelloDoris Fri 19-Apr-13 19:29:49

My very good friend does wedding photography on the side to his main job. He's a tea total non smoking gent who does incredibly cheap (for weddings) prices. If you want the details let me know. He's based in Herts but can and will travel for a price.

If you want his details PM me.


BlastAndDalmatians Fri 19-Apr-13 19:38:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pixel Fri 19-Apr-13 19:50:47

Hmm maybe... but just because it's your second job doesn't mean it's not a job! perhaps he's cheap because he's not paying tax on his 'hobby'

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