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To not want to DTD

(76 Posts)
K8eee Wed 17-Apr-13 10:11:16

Am I the only female out there that really doesn't want to DTD while AF is around. DH doesn't understand the feelings of being torn in the middle with cramps and backache, along with all the usual effects of a period (typical man I know!) but just wondering how many women are with me on this one or am I just plain boring? grin

KC225 Wed 17-Apr-13 10:15:55

What is DTD and AF?

Crunchymunchyhoneycakes Wed 17-Apr-13 10:16:25

My dh wouldn't be in the slightest bit interested in trying to 'persuade' me if I was reluctant particularly if it was because I was feeling crappy, he respects me and cares about me. Typical man eh?

Crunchymunchyhoneycakes Wed 17-Apr-13 10:17:05

I believe the OP means having sexual intercourse whilst menstruating KC225.

kotinka Wed 17-Apr-13 10:17:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OnTheNingNangNong Wed 17-Apr-13 10:18:17

I'm not one for DTD when AF is around. Too sore and messy.

picnicbasketcase Wed 17-Apr-13 10:18:29

I don't do it. I can't see how either party can feel remotely turned on with all that going on.

Imnotaslimjim Wed 17-Apr-13 10:19:20

I think most men would be put off by the mess tbh, I know my DH won't go anywhere near me until I'm completely done for the month! Or is it my DH that is unusual?

AKissIsNotAContract Wed 17-Apr-13 10:19:21

I find an orgasm relieves my cramps.

kotinka Wed 17-Apr-13 10:23:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ogooglebar Wed 17-Apr-13 10:24:03

YANBU OP, don't do it if you don't feel like it (obviously!) But I'm the same as AKiss - orgasms relieve the cramps! We don't do PIV in the first couple of days though because it's too sore.

Kafri Wed 17-Apr-13 10:25:28

to be fair I would say (d)h should b a little more considerate whatever your reason. if you don't fancy it then that should be the end of it. There's always tomorrow as it

RatRatRat Wed 17-Apr-13 10:28:09

Sex helps my cramps too.

But if you aren't feeling up to it then of course he should leave you alone.

EhricLovesTeamQhuay Wed 17-Apr-13 10:31:47

I don't fuck when I'm menstruating either, I think it's a common preference. IMO most men prefer not to also (squeamish)

EhricLovesTeamQhuay Wed 17-Apr-13 10:32:47

Is your partner trying to persuade you to? He should respect your wishes and leave you be.

Sallyingforth Wed 17-Apr-13 10:33:09

I find it helps with cramps to. We just avoid the heaviest couple of days out of consideration for the bed sheet but it's OK in the shower

Sallyingforth Wed 17-Apr-13 10:34:02

too not to !!

Binkyridesagain Wed 17-Apr-13 10:36:09

Having to cover everything in plastic sheets in order to DTD isn't a turn on IMO. Also I've found a couple of ibuprofen, a hot water bottle and a bar of chocolate is better for cramps.

Loulybelle Wed 17-Apr-13 10:38:56

YANBU, i did it once, the cramps, the mess and gross feeling is a passionkiller.

AnythingNotEverything Wed 17-Apr-13 10:44:18

Does DH understand that consensual sex relies on agreement from both parties? It's ok to not be in the mood at any time!

DTD during AF has never even crossed my mind. Sounds quite disgusting to me.

aldiwhore Wed 17-Apr-13 11:14:05

I don't have an issue with it at all, but if you don't feel like it, or if it's just not for you, then I don't don't have an issue with that either.

Personally I usually forgot I was on, and it wasn't ever that messy. There was nothing disgusting about it, certainly nothing more 'disgusting' than the usual exchange of bodily fluid.

AnythingNotEverything Wed 17-Apr-13 11:43:24

Sorry - just re-read that post and it sounds really judgy! I wasn't doing any cat's bum mouth about it ... Just not my thing!

TroublesomeEx Wed 17-Apr-13 11:54:21

I've only ever DTD with AF once and decided never again. It was nasty.

But again, my stbxh would never have tried to coerce me into DTD whatever my reason for saying no.

K8eee Wed 17-Apr-13 12:53:19

Ah feeling a lot more reassured! Maybe it's just because DH is a horny bugger and it seems he wants to dip his wick regardless of the state I'm in...not sure whether to take that as a compliment or not grin

We have done it in the past during AF but normally on the lighter days. I've stopped the pill and were TTC baby #1 so I think that could be another reason why he is so desperate! I agree with the duvet and choccy, much needed oh and a hot water bottle smile

ouryve Wed 17-Apr-13 12:56:12

Have sex. Have intercourse. Shag. Bonk.
Period. Menstruate.

But otherwise, I'm only in the mood when I'm fertile and that doesn't happen every month, these days.

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