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To think some people are just cheeky fuckers?!

(46 Posts)
Inseywinseyupthespout Mon 15-Apr-13 20:34:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Inseywinseyupthespout Mon 15-Apr-13 20:35:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CloudsAndTrees Mon 15-Apr-13 20:36:54

YANBU to think that some people are cheeky fuckers, plenty of people are cheeky fuckers, but YABU to invite people to a meal at your expense and then criticise them for ordering what they actually want. Do it graciously or don't do it at all.

Shenanagins Mon 15-Apr-13 20:37:18

Go back and say you forgot to mention that there is a supplement on these and see how quickly they change their minds!

Rosesforrosie Mon 15-Apr-13 20:37:58

YababitU I'm afraid. If they are nice people they will offer to pay on the day, so reserve judgement!

usualsuspect Mon 15-Apr-13 20:39:22

I would never order the most expensive meal on a menu if someone else was paying.

Cheeky fuckers

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Mon 15-Apr-13 20:39:25

So say that's great, thanks for your order. We're paying the first £X for everyone, so can you please send me the difference, which is £Y, before we arrive so that we can order your meals, otherwise we'll just have to order within the £X budget. Ta.

mumofweeboys Mon 15-Apr-13 20:40:09


I would email saying there was a supplement too.

SanityClause Mon 15-Apr-13 20:43:21

You are doing a lovely thing. Keep concentrating on why you are doing this - its for your FIL and MIL. Rise above it.

SarahAndFuck Mon 15-Apr-13 20:48:01

Make sure they know you aren't paying for their drinks as well.

CombineBananaFister Mon 15-Apr-13 20:49:46

YANBU in thinking they are cheeky fuckers. They might not actually be cheeky fuckers though. If I was going out for a meal I would want to order something I really like (not just the cheapest deal) as I don't get out much grin and would want to make the most of it.

Having said that, I would also be offering up front to pay for my meal without the embarrassment of you having to ask for it.

Definately ok to ask for supplement towards it imho.

Jan49 Mon 15-Apr-13 21:12:25

As it's a meal out, is it really necessary for you to pay for anyone other than your immediate family, MIL and FIL? Have you invited them in a way that makes it clear you are paying and if so what has it said you are paying for? If you say you're paying for everything you could end up running up a large bill in drinks so personally I'd want to make it clearer before the event.

If you've sent everyone a menu and told them you'll be paying, I don't think they're cheeky to order the item they'd like to eat. I don't suppose your FIL's friend knows you're skint and I wouldn't expect someone who is skint to be offering to pay for meals for a group of people. If you can only afford for them to choose certain items then I think you either need to tell them that or say they need to pay for their own. So I don't think they are cheeky. Well maybe just a little. But maybe they simply ordered what they want to eat.

EmpressMaud Mon 15-Apr-13 21:15:13

They might not have any idea about your financial situation?

verytellytubby Mon 15-Apr-13 21:17:31

Can't everyone pay for themselves and you just pay for your inlaws and yourself?

Make it clear you are not paying for drinks!

DearJohnLoveSavannah Mon 15-Apr-13 21:19:58

I doubt they've ordered the most expensive meal purely to annoy you. They've ordered it because they like that meal.

rubyflipper Mon 15-Apr-13 21:21:38

What you are doing is very generous but YABU - you should have specified a set menu with a fixed price if you needed to keep such a tight control of costs.

expatinscotland Mon 15-Apr-13 21:22:17

What Hecsy said.

aldiwhore Mon 15-Apr-13 21:25:08

YABU to involve a menu on which there are items you really don't want to pay for.

I LOATHE big family 'meals in pubs' and more especially those that do shite offers. But that's just me.

Much cheaper to throw a family BBQ or a family day trip OUT somewhere with picnic (rain won't kill you).

IABU I know but meh, don't much care.

If you send a menu out with options on it, don't complain that some chooses something they want, not everyone looks at the price, some do, not everyone would think it off that what the fancy is expensive, some do... you could have avoided this, saved money and not ended up somewhere shitey for lunch (just my opinion). smile

(I know you probably think I am a snob, I'm really not that bad, but if a pub can do two meals for £5, then they're shite, it's probably horsemeat or anus... much better all round to ask everyone to bring two plates of something to the park/beach/back garden, then everyone eats for less than a fiver, and at least it's not costing you much).

Inseywinseyupthespout Mon 15-Apr-13 21:34:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheChaoGoesMu Mon 15-Apr-13 21:35:28

I'd choose what I want rather than the cheapest thing, but I'd offer to pay. Maybe he will on the day too.

Kafri Mon 15-Apr-13 22:16:51

I actually think it partly depends on your own financial situation in a way.
I dont have all that much spare cash each month so when we do eat out I'd always try to find something on the menu that takes my fancy but doesn't cost the earth and would do the same if someone else were paying.

but I guess if money is no problem fir someone and they could choose whatever they wanted then they're likely to choose whatever they want if someone else is paying. I haven't explained myself well at all there!!

I doubt they've deliberately picked the most expensive items simply cos someone else is paying. though I could just be being really naive

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Mon 15-Apr-13 22:49:56

yabu. Some people just won't think...not many but some. If you were that pushed you should have indicated.

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Mon 15-Apr-13 22:51:26

Kafri put is better. Some people simply have no experience of watching the pennies and they simply don't realise. They think "Meal out...great...I always like streak when I go out so I'll order that to be safe."

Others like me know how it is to be careful and order middling or look for deals.

mysteryfairy Mon 15-Apr-13 23:05:45

How much does a steak actually cost in a venue that does two meals for £10? It sounds like it might very well be an amount that to a lot of people would not feel like a hugely expensive meal and they might not realise it could be perceived a cheeky order.

You've done a really kind thing in the knowledge that you are helping distressed MIL. I really hope you ignore the advice to challenge the steak orderers or try and extract a supplement from them as it would be so sad if your lovely gesture was spoiled over a quibble over a few pounds.

YoniMaroney Mon 15-Apr-13 23:25:01

I doubt the most expensive thing is that expensive tbh, if you didn't want them ordering something nice,you should have sent the 2 for £10 menu only, not just passive aggrssively mound when they didn't follow your unwritten rules.

Personally I find it annoying going out with people who only want to eat from the cheap menu, because the food is usually crap, I'm perfectly happy to pay for myself and get something nice.

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