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to laugh about my children's zoo trauma?

(63 Posts)
pointythings Mon 15-Apr-13 18:33:43

Were at the zoo today (non-pupil day here in Suffolk and lovely weather) and ended up walking past the zebra enclosure to find the zebras seriously at it. They watched in horror all the way to the end and ever since I have heard nothing but 1)grossed out comments about zebra sex, 2) questions about whether other animals do it in the same way (including whales confused) and 3) the stated intention never, ever to have sex.

I am being unreasonable to find it all utterly hilarious, aren't I?

HollyBerryBush Mon 15-Apr-13 18:35:24

I'm going to have to google, as whales suckle their young, where do they keep their nipples?

LaurieFairyCake Mon 15-Apr-13 18:36:09


What a great introduction to sex - are zebras hung like horses? Cos I assumed men had 20 inch cocks after I saw a stallion hmm

Fucking disappointment seeing a mans grin

No idea where I thought I was going to put it .....

flossieraptor Mon 15-Apr-13 18:36:51

You should have told them it was a giant crossword grin

livinginwonderland Mon 15-Apr-13 18:39:20

hahah, brilliant! which zoo was it?

crazydrunkevilyoni Mon 15-Apr-13 18:39:53

flossie grin

PiggyPlumPie Mon 15-Apr-13 18:43:03

NU at all!! I still remember fondly taking my then 3 yo niece to Chester Zoo where we saw the elephants at it. grin

All of the elephants bar one charged at the lone lady and she didn't stand much of a chance!

And is was like a fifth leg, it was mahoosive!! grin grin grin

pointythings Mon 15-Apr-13 18:43:55

Laurie we have established that zebras are indeed hung like horses - when I pointed out that was where the saying came from, I got more hilarious disgust...

living it was Banham in Norfolk.

Holly we were not thinking about whale nipples, more about whale penises, and I think we established that they don't do it doggy style grin. I told them a blue whale penis was 6 ft long, I've just looked it up and it's 8 to 10 feet shock grin.

'Twas a fabulous afternoon.

HollyBerryBush Mon 15-Apr-13 18:44:25

I went to Colchester Zoo - they had a monkey, masterbating frantically at all the teenage girls. Never doing that school trip again.

livinginwonderland Mon 15-Apr-13 18:52:10

by the way, i didn't ask that so i could go and see zebras having sex, i promise.

CharlieUniformNovemberTango Mon 15-Apr-13 19:02:19

We went to a petting zoo the other day and DS announced gleefully that the birds were doing piggy backs much to the amusement of everyone around.

DD come over to see, stopped dead in her tracks with wide eyed disgust and promptly turned on her heels to blush soemehere else grin

We saw camels doing it at blair drummond once. But she was younger and only remembers the elephants pooing from that trip. I was surprised that the all crowded in a circle around the performing pair. I don't think I could do it with an audience smile

phantomnamechanger Mon 15-Apr-13 19:17:25

We have had (in the car) "mummy, in that garden there was a dog giving another dog a piggy back" and at the zoo "whats that swishy thing dangling there" (elephant penis, unmissable!) - and the lovely young gorillas deliberately crapping on their hands and eating it to entertain the shreiking kids.

helenthemadex Mon 15-Apr-13 19:21:13

is this like dogging, just with animals instead?

YANBU at all

Still18atheart Mon 15-Apr-13 19:23:59

Reminds me of the time when as a young teenager went on a school trip to a zoo. The amount of giggling that happened over some meerkats having sex grin

Theala Mon 15-Apr-13 19:28:04

i got a fit of the giggles when i saw some pigs having sex once when i was with my parents. i was 36 at the time. blush

CaptainKirksNipples Mon 15-Apr-13 19:29:38

We watched the otters at it last weekend at the farm park. They are quite acrobatic, lots of rolling and weird positions then a few seconds of very fast humping!

Then in the next enclosure a marmoset was riding on the back of a tortoise and kids wanted to know if they were making babies too!grin

pointythings Mon 15-Apr-13 19:31:22

grin at marmoset possibly shagging turtle - they'd be interesting babies, though!

LagomOchLyckaSwede Mon 15-Apr-13 19:35:42

We saw flying squirrels going at it.

Quite disturbing actually as, due to the skin stretching to the ends of the arms from around the stomach area, the female as completely hidden and we only realised what was happening when the female popped her head out.

Also seen a chimp apparently masturbating hmm

HoneyDragon Mon 15-Apr-13 19:41:13

We went to a farm when I was heavily pg with dd. In our case it was a couple of alpacas.

Ds enquiried as to what they were doing.

Having sex was my cheery reply as at 6 Ds had already had the basics explained.

He turned to me with eyes wide with horror and said "Wow! Did Daddy not really hurt your back when he did that to you? He's much bigger than you!" blush

We nearly killed the senior gentleman behind us, and his wife. He was laughing so hard he went for a sit down blush

HoneyDragon Mon 15-Apr-13 19:43:20

Theala grin

peeriebear Mon 15-Apr-13 19:45:13

Many years ago on a trip to Colchester zoo, one of the chimps was weeing in a plastic bottle hmm
LOL Honeydragon grin

ChunkyPickle Mon 15-Apr-13 19:49:55

Awww, brings back memories of the chimpanzees at the zoo we went to when I was a kid. Expert aims with all bodily fluids (luckily my dad knew them from old and told us to stand back - other visitors got covered in pee and worse..)

LagomOchLyckaSwede Mon 15-Apr-13 19:53:36

Ooh, I saw a chimp do that in Colchester! I love Colchester Zoo, then and now (we live in Essex but I have to work away a lot for my company) and we love the aardvark burrow and the familiar friends bit (because you can touch and feed the animals) and suricata sands. <daydreams>

Herhonesty Mon 15-Apr-13 19:54:23

Same thing happened to us at marwell with tigers. Luckily dd aged 2 didn't blink an eyelid but me and dh were killing ourselvessmile

pointythings Mon 15-Apr-13 20:07:44

I had fun explaining to DDs that humans got to do it in lots of different positions, unlike animals... This in the middle of waiting for the bird of prey display. Shame I didn't get to quote the Eddie Izzard 'Methods of Procreation' sketch at them...

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