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To be concerned my friend seemed pissed off after I looked after her DD?

(237 Posts)
AuntFini Tue 09-Apr-13 15:51:37

I took my friend's DD (23 months) out for the day today to give my friend a chance to prepare for her parents and siblings visiting for the week. I have no kids.

We went to a farm and I took her for lunch, and after 4 hours went back to meet my friend at the coach station where she was meeting family. By this point her DD was asleep in her car seat in my car, exhausted. My friends asked where her DD was and I said asleep and she seemed really cross. She moved her DD (still sleeping, in carseat) to her car, got in and left.

I'm left feeling a bit confused as to what I've done on this one!

BlingLoving Tue 09-Apr-13 16:13:25

Definitely a bit strange. If she didn't want her dd to fall asleep, she should have told you in advance. Not that there's much you could have done about it frankly.

Did she thank you at all?

Lexiesinclair Tue 09-Apr-13 16:15:48

She was very rude. I'd be so grateful to anyone who took my DC off my hands for the day, nap or no nap!!

skratta Tue 09-Apr-13 16:17:04

Definitely weird.

You sound like a great friend, it's hard to do a day out when my DS was a toddler, and it sounds like you made it a lovely day.

kinkyfuckery Tue 09-Apr-13 16:20:02

I'd imagine it was a panicked reaction to her DD being asleep so late in the day. Hopefully she'll realise she was BU and apologise and thank you for helping her out.

I'm confused as to why she asked where her DD was though, when you were stood right beside the open car door confused

Gales Tue 09-Apr-13 16:23:59

Maybe she was stressed and pissed of with something else? Having the kind of family visit you need to "prepare" for can't be a lot of fun. If she was already tired and fed up and then realised DD had slept which means she won't sleep later....

She was still rude, but I find when someone is off with you, it's rarely really about the "thing" you think it was, it's always about something else going on in their life at the time.

LadyClariceCannockMonty Tue 09-Apr-13 16:33:11

grin at 'Your friend wants jam on it.'

That was rude of her. Don't go out of your way for her in the future.

cees Tue 09-Apr-13 16:38:09

Your friend was an ungrateful cow, why not ring her and ask what her problem was and then come back so we can all tear strips off her lend a understanding point of view.

SatsukiKusukabe Tue 09-Apr-13 16:53:37

Right, I assumed you had left her alone in the car (that would piss me off)

But you didn,t so you're friend is just ungrateful and rude really.

BehindLockNumberNine Tue 09-Apr-13 16:56:26

You did nothing wrong and sound very very lovely. Friend was very ungrateful.

HungryClocksGoBackFourSeconds Tue 09-Apr-13 16:58:31

Did she say thankyou?

You cannot physically stop a baby from falling asleep in the car. It's impossible, and if she wanted her to nap earlier she should have told you.

CSIJanner Tue 09-Apr-13 16:58:32

If she didn't want her child to have a late nap, she should have told you when she dropped her off. Even if she has things on her mind, she's being rude.

YANBU - my lot would love to be taken out for the day like you've done for your friend.

Twentytotwo Tue 09-Apr-13 17:05:36

It's not your fault. She didn't warn you and it's pretty difficult to keep a knackered child awake when they're in the back seat and you're driving.

The child might be a 'bad waker'. I have a niece who went through a stage around that age where if she fell asleep and you tried to wake her she threw an uncontrolled tantrum until you let her sleep again. She could go for hours.

Coconutty Tue 09-Apr-13 17:06:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Maggie111 Tue 09-Apr-13 17:06:17

Hopefully she was in a pissy mood for some unrelated reason.

Either way I wouldn't consider doing any more favours until she said she was grateful for the last one!!

Fudgemallowdelight Tue 09-Apr-13 17:11:19

Did she actually thank you?? You did her a huge favour and she should have thanked you profusely! It sounds like her dd needed that sleep and how could you stop it when you were driving anyway? What a cow. If she doesn't thank you then don't bother to help out again.

Fudgemallowdelight Tue 09-Apr-13 17:14:27

I think it is unfair to expect people to keep an exhausted child awake

Twentytotwo Tue 09-Apr-13 17:35:18

Even crack chocolate buttons don't always work.

Jinafire Tue 09-Apr-13 17:41:06

If my DD has so much as a 5 min doze it affects her sleep for that night.

I, however, would be sooooo grateful for the 4 hours of freedom that being awake for a bit later at night wouldn't bother me.

So what time can I drop her off ... grin

eatyouwithaspoon Tue 09-Apr-13 17:43:11

It is impossible to keep a tired toddler awake on a car journey, my 4 year old still sleeps in the car after a day out, your friend was very rude.

AuntFini Tue 09-Apr-13 17:44:30

She's just texted to say she would have preferred if I'd let her DD sleep on the way there and not the way back. Not being used to toddlers, I obviously don't know how to do that. I did try feeding choc buttons on the way home but even they weren't enough to keep her awake, she had a few and then fell asleep.

Not to worry as I'll be sure to keep my fun days out for mornings only in future in the hopes they don't need to nap!

pigletmania Tue 09-Apr-13 17:46:12

Yanbu at all, your 'friend' sounds rude and ungrateful and I would not do her any favours again. How can you stop a toddler having a nap if tey are exhausted.

HerrenaHandbasket Tue 09-Apr-13 17:47:13

I poke mine with a stick piglet wink

Euphemia Tue 09-Apr-13 17:47:35

Well if there were instructions she should have made them clear beforehand.

Ungrateful cow - I'd be telling her to fuck right off. angry

pigletmania Tue 09-Apr-13 17:48:19

Your friend is being very unreasonable expecting a baby to nap on demand, te pour thing had a lovely day and needed sleep unfortunately toddlers and babes don't always do what we want. Can you take 14 month ds out you sound lovely, ignore her

OHforDUCKScake Tue 09-Apr-13 17:49:19

I think you would be a door mat to ever take her child out again tbh.

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