My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To wonder what the hell I am supposed to do all day now I am a stay at home mum?

127 replies

gettingolderandoutofstyle · 07/04/2013 13:51

I have been a stay at home Mum since DS was born (now age 2). For the first year I just met up with other mums each day who were also on maternity leave (but this actually cost me a lot of money going to cafes, soft play etc.) Now they are all back at work I have decided I would like to stay at home until DS (and I am 12 weeks pregnant with DC2) start school. But I am at a loss of what to do each day? At the moment DS wakes me up at 6am, we have breakfast, get dressed, then watch cbeebies for about an hour and a half before driving DH to work. We are back home by 9.30, I then put a wash load on, do the ironing and clean one room (I have allocated a room in our apartment to clean each day). DS just potters and plays with his toys and 'helps' me do bits of the cleaning. Then it is 11am we have a snack and I try and bake cakes or do colouring or playdoh or something until lunchtime but find it hard to stretch the activity out to last until lunch. We eat lunch, quick clean up and then I start thinking it is only 1pm, what the hell am I going to do until I pick my DH up at 5.30pm? If we go to the park I am usually bored after an hour and by the time we are home there are still at least another 2 hours to kill. What do other stay at home mums do? My own mum said I used to go to nursery every morning but she still struggled to fill the afternoons with me so she has no suggestions.

OP posts:
Report
CaptainSweatPants · 07/04/2013 13:54

You need to go out or you'll go mad
Library
Free museums that have something to catch the interest of your child
Make a network of mum grieves to go round to theirs for coffee

Report
hwjm1945 · 07/04/2013 13:55

Playgroup s

Report
TunipTheVegedude · 07/04/2013 13:56

You could waste time pissing about on the internet.

Report
prettywhiteguitar · 07/04/2013 13:57

Does your ds have a nap ? Do you have a hobby or interest ? That's kept me going in the endless cycle of housework and entertain kids

Report
MsAkimbo · 07/04/2013 13:57

Agree, outings. My DD is much younger and I try to go out everyday.

Also, does your DS nap? If so, nap. Nap. NAP.

Report
prettywhiteguitar · 07/04/2013 13:58

No no if your not tired hobby while they nap, keeps you sane

Report
gettingolderandoutofstyle · 07/04/2013 13:59

TunipTheVegedude haha that is what I seem to do for about 2 hours each afternoon after we have been to the park although DS is not very impressed, he keeps saying 'come off mummy'. So far today I have been up since 6am which seems wrong on a Sunday, already been to the shops and the park, DS has been watching tv for about 2 hours, DH is at work and I just think what on earth can we do??

OP posts:
Report
Viviennemary · 07/04/2013 13:59

I think it is possibly more difficult to be a SAHM if you need to be always on the go and only have one child. I had a neighbour like this once. Whole house cleaned from top to bottom by 9.30 and then she was bored. You could try a routine. Mondays we go to this, Tuesdays we do that and so on. I agree with network of Mums to meet up for lunch or coffee. And check out libraries for story times and activity hours and so on.

Report
prettywhiteguitar · 07/04/2013 13:59

Sorry forgot you are pregnant, lie down ! please conserve your energy And get love film

Report
TheSeventhHorcrux · 07/04/2013 14:00

Do you like arts and crafts? Maybe you could start making things and selling them online on places like Etsy?

This kept me occupied during sick leave and unemployment and with a toddler (who could do his own crafts) you could really fill your time.

Trying activity classes to; play group, swimming, library - do some local research and find an activity for every other day

Report
Moomoomie · 07/04/2013 14:00

Park.
Library.
Mother and toddler groups.
Swimming.
Museums.
Long slow walks, looking at ants etc.
Seaside.
Walk in the woods.
You will soon meet new friends with similar aged children.

Report
morethanpotatoprints · 07/04/2013 14:02

Hello OP.

I have been a sahm for 20+ years and have done many things.
Its a good time to take up a hobby or pursue your interests, distance learning, volunteering in the community.
With your dc there are parks, libraries, the beach, forests, indoor soft play. Swimming, play groups, mother and toddler, etc.
I just did everything and anything I wanted to, personally I found it empowering and liberating. I think you need to embrace the change though or else agree with the above, you'd go mad. Look at what you can achieve personally and that should keep you on the right track.
Good luck, hope you enjoy.

Report
gettingolderandoutofstyle · 07/04/2013 14:02

MsAkimbo He doesn't do naps anymore :( He sleeps 7.30pm until 6am, the days I have tried to get him to nap he will not go to bed until midnight and still wake up at 6am :(

OP posts:
Report
JamieandtheMagicTorch · 07/04/2013 14:02

Go to library, museums, soft play ( aaaargh), parent and toddler groups, swimming, toy shop


But make friends with someone and have a cuppa together while the children bite each other


I am very glad i had not come across MN when mine were this age because i would have been seriously addcited and possibly neglectful

Report
noblegiraffe · 07/04/2013 14:03

Supermarket, library, various different parks, city farm, soft play, play date, toddler group, lunch in asda cafe (cheap!). In the summer sandpit in the back garden, or paddling pool filled with toys can keep him occupied for hours. Baking, painting, craft kits, dens. CBeebies

Report
ohforfoxsake · 07/04/2013 14:04

Get out and about, make friends, playgroups in the morning, lunch, make dinner whilst LO naps (if still does). Picnics in the park, day trips out. Do a course, look into professional qualifications for when you do go back to work, if you do.

I did most of my socialising during the day, having friends round for lunch, going for coffee. It's the best way to preserve your sanity IMO.

Being PG again, this is the calm before the storm - enjoy it, read books, clear out the kitchen drawer.

It can be mindnumbingly dull, force yourself to enjoy it.

Report
Backtobedlam · 07/04/2013 14:04

I used to make sure we got out every day or we'd all go stir crazy! Walks in the woods, park, playgroup, library, scoot/bike around where we live, swimming, other toddler groups (gymnastics, baby signing, tumble tots etc), walk to shops instead of drive.

As we're then only at home for a few hours its easiee to keep them entertained without me getting bored! We do lots out in the garden, cooking, painting, simple games, build large train tracks, den building, duplo models. Once you get into it you'll be amazed where the day goes!

Report
gettingolderandoutofstyle · 07/04/2013 14:06

They are good ideas thank you, I will have a look at what activities we have nearby, maybe I could make some kind of planner each month of what we are going to do each day! I feel like we should just be content at home, my MIL said she just used to stay in every day, she said there is always housework to do, tv to catch up on etc. but I seem to have run out of things to do at home by 11am each day, and I cant spend until 5pm watching tv every day, I will go insane!

OP posts:
Report
NeoMaxiZoomDweebie · 07/04/2013 14:08

Make stuff! Craft...sew....go for walks....

Report
ParmaViolette · 07/04/2013 14:08

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 07/04/2013 14:10

Also, when both mine were just over 2 they started at a community playgroup 2 or 3 mornings a week). Very necessary for sanitym eespecially when i had a baby and toddler. Look out for one of these. They are ususally parent managed but you leave the child there.

Report
gettingolderandoutofstyle · 07/04/2013 14:11

ParmaViolette I am doing a OU distance learning course which I do in the evenings after DS goes to bed, although I do find I am exhausted by the time he is in bed from being up at 6am and like to just crash some nights. I do want to be a stay at home mum, I just feel like I have no idea what I should be doing to fill these long endless days?

OP posts:
Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

OldBagWantsNewBag · 07/04/2013 14:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gettingolderandoutofstyle · 07/04/2013 14:12

Also we do not have a garden which I think makes it harder, if we did I would just stick DS out there for a couple of hours each day while I did some reading, or maybe started gardening or something.

OP posts:
Report
JamieandtheMagicTorch · 07/04/2013 14:12

I agree with ParmaViolette.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.