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Neighbour dispute about my car

(56 Posts)
nitrox Thu 04-Apr-13 08:16:39

Hi everyone,

Feeling totally bewildered by all this.

Yesterday I was in my livingroom at 7:30am and I heard a big smash outside. My car is parked in a marked parking bar on the road, 2 houses down the street, and a car had not seen it and smashed into the back of it.

Longstory cut short, she didn't see my car, admits liability, both cars will most likely be written off, I made her a drink, we called the Police and all was fine, amicable and friendly with her throughout.

My problem is with the neighbour of the house my car was parked outside of.

The street only has a few parking bays, we have a driveways but 2 cars in our household. My boyfriend uses the drive, I use the parking bays and I have a parking permit. One of the parking bays is outside this mans house, he has 1 car and a driveway and does not use this parking bay.

Her car was towed away within the hour, mine is being towed today hopefully, so it has been in the parking bay outside his house, the rear of it smashed in. Debris was swept off the road and into the gutter by the Police and they said I was fine to leave the car there until it was recovered.

So, to get to the point. Myself and my boyfriend walked up to my car around 7pm last night to look at it. A neighbour came past and said how awful it was that my car had been hit and gave her sympathies. The other neighbour came out and basically starting ranting away to us about when we were going to clean up the gutter of the mess... is the car moveable? it's my fault the mess is there as it's my car and I was involved whether I was in the car or not. He keeps his road clean and I should clean it all up now. He doesn't like me parking there because his relatives visit at the weekend and they have to park up the road and it's an inconvenience to him.

He said a lot to be honest and I was so shocked by his attitude (60 ish years old) that I can't remember a lot blush. We were polite, didn't raise our voices or swear and he just kept getting more irate. In the end we walked back to our house as it was clear he was just having ago about me parking there and saying snide comments like " well, you won't be parking there again will you ".

Anyhow, sorry for the essay. I couldn't sleep last night and now we are considering moving house. My car has been hit a few times now; it's a busy and tight road, and this neighbours reaction has upset us.

My car will be recovered today and I really don't want to clean the gutter now. It's nearly all plastic from the other car, no glass.. and before he came out I was full intending to clear it up just to be polite and because that's just what you do. Half the mess is under my car and I can't get to it yet anyhow. I feel like he will be watching me and might come out again.

So, should I still clean it or leave it?

Sorry for the essay blush stress of yesterday, work and my last month of Uni are all getting to me and I feel at the end of my tether sad

Altinkum Thu 04-Apr-13 08:19:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bigbuttons Thu 04-Apr-13 08:20:19

How is it HIS parking bay? Residents' bay yes, but not his, no. Sorry you have had to go through this shit. Some people really do think they own the space outside their homes.

ginmakesitallok Thu 04-Apr-13 08:22:07

I'd clean it up, might not be your fault, but who else I'd going to do it? I'd ignore the rest of what your neighbour said.

Pancakeflipper Thu 04-Apr-13 08:23:01

I would clear it up. I would be the bigger person. And not just cleaning it up for him but for the other neighbour(s) and the passers-by. Also for me - just so I didn't keep seeing that reminder of the car bump and the narky neighbour incident each time I went out.

Ignore the neighbour. They have vented for whatever reasons ( might have been having a bad day regarding something else and you copped for a real mouthful). I would forget them and think about the person who crashed into you and the police and how that was all amicable.

NorthernLurker Thu 04-Apr-13 08:23:22

Well it's not his space so he can get stuffed tbh. I would pick up anylarge pieces of debris but not worry otherwise.

Footface Thu 04-Apr-13 08:23:50

I think you should clean up the mess once your car in moved. Don't worry about the rest though.

When you have a new car, carry on parking it where you want

Rosa Thu 04-Apr-13 08:27:09

He has no other life it sonds like to me so he has to rant about something as it makes him feel important... Just ignore it. If it was me when the car is towed away remove the rubbish that you can . When you car is returned keep parking where you are entitled to and if he says anything else ask him to please refrain from talking to you unless he has anything pleasant to say. Polite but firm and then ignore....

nitrox Thu 04-Apr-13 08:27:29

That's his problem, he said "I keep my road outside my house clean", we said it's not your road and it's a council owned parking bay. I asked if his family had a residents parking permit and he said yes, but when I asked him about it more he couldn't answer and then admitted they didn't.

It was getting silly, so we just walked away.

It's only been 24hrs so far.

The only other time I've spoken to him was when I moved my car off our driveway 20 minutes before my boyfriend got home from work. He came out and asked why had I moved off the drive to the parking bay, and I said because the driveway is needed in 20 minutes and he just walked off... so I know he has a problem, but yesterday was ridiculous. He seemed very happy that my car had been hit.

We have seen him taking photo's of lorries parked outside our house before, not outside his house, when the drivers have nipped into the chip shop and waved through our window that they will just be 5 mins and we have said no problem with us. He's just spiteful I guess.

I want to clean the road blush but I'm so angry at what he said yesterday angry

AngryBeaver Thu 04-Apr-13 08:27:30

Ok, breathe.

Don't move house unless you don't enjoy living there!

It's unfortunate that your car got hit, but yes, I would clear uo the mess once your car is towed.

Did you ask the guy's permission before parking in "his" bay?

If you can park round the corner, I would do that.

Or ask your boyfriend to park around the corner and you take the drive?

People can get funny about people parking outside their home, I kind of understand that.

You did the right thing not raising your voice, the neighbour sounds like he has been grumbling to himself about it for a while and then just unloaded.

I really wouldn't worry about it. It's not a major problem.

Have a night off uni work and maybe go out somewhere nice at the weekend, cinema or something, and unwind.

You sound nice. Don't worry smile

AngryBeaver Thu 04-Apr-13 08:30:14

oh, ok, it's not his bay. He will just have to accept that poeple might park outside his hime then, really!

nitrox Thu 04-Apr-13 08:33:14

Thanks for the replies, I was stressing myself out about it.

After everything yesterday, I was so pleased with the fact the the girl that hit my car and me got along fine and I feel proud that I helped her when she was upset and in shock. Yes, my car was damaged, but she had been in the accident, not me.

I think I will clean the road of the worst of the mess, just so that it doesn't affect other drivers.

Also, the girl that hit me said a car was behind her when she hit mine, they waited until she limped her car out of the way and then just drive on, didn't stop at all.

It's only because I ran down the street in my PJ's that she had anyone else there for her after the accident. The ranty neighbour who was most likely home never came out.

Oh, and he had a go at the girl leaning against his front wall when the Police were giving her a breathaliser test. Why is that my fault?

Silly old fool I guess.

bonzo77 Thu 04-Apr-13 08:35:00

He's a dick. Clear up the debris then ignore. Why would his occasional visitors with no permit have more right to park there than you who needs to park everyday?

Longdistance Thu 04-Apr-13 08:36:49

It's not 'his' bay regardless. It's a public road, owned by the council, so has bog all to do with him.

I would clear it up, best you can. And tell him he's a vile little man, and should keep his opinions to himself! Awful man.

Nothing worse than an accident happening, it's not your fault, and you're left to pick up the pieces, and then some stupid twerp has a go.

Hope you feel calmer now op.

scarletforya Thu 04-Apr-13 08:37:58

You poor thing OP.

He's just a nasty old bully. It's none of his business who parks there. I notice he didn't come out to rant while the Police were there. Grrr on your behalf.

Ignore the horrible eejit!

ChasedByBees Thu 04-Apr-13 08:38:41

We've had similar problems with a neighbour. Ignore ignore ignore! He's totally in the wrong if he's letting family park there without a permit. It's just territorial selfishness.

HollaAtMeBaby Thu 04-Apr-13 08:39:16

He's an arse. If I've understood your first post, the parking bay isn't even directly outside his house but that of his neighbour, correct?

I wouldn't clear up. It's not his road, it's a public highway, but if he loves cleaning it so much he can do it himself. You've paid your taxes, the council can keep it clean.

This is really not worth moving house over, by the way.

Tailtwister Thu 04-Apr-13 08:40:33

He's an idiot. Ignore him.

If he comments again, remind him that the road is a public highway and he doesn't own the part outside his house. I would clean up the debris once your car has been moved. More out of courtesy for other people who may park there rather than him.

BLOO3Z Thu 04-Apr-13 08:41:12

He is a sad old man who has nothing better to do with his time, clean the mess up when the car has been removed..

nitrox Thu 04-Apr-13 08:41:33

Yes, I feel much better now, thanks everyone! smile

Just felt like I had done the wrong thing trying to stand up for myself and maybe he was right and I should have cleaned it up the same day.

He is a horrible man, and I said to my boyfriend last night that he can't be a happy person and more fool him really.

I think he's made quite a lot of assumptions about us as a couple. We both have little hatchback cars, I work from home and we wear a lot of hoodies (snowboarders) smile.. he most likely thinks we are scummy chavs.. when in reality I'm a self emplyed Graphic Designer working from home, my boyfriend is a very hard working engineer and we are saving for a house deposit, hence no new cars!

Sod him, I shouldn't even care what he thinks.

Doyouthinktheysaurus Thu 04-Apr-13 08:42:20

He's a grump!

People become very possessive of the bit of road outside their house, just ignore him.

I would clean the gutter, just because that's polite but ignore him and carry on as you were when you get another car. Park outside his house if it's convenient.

Sorry your car got hit by the way, that's really shit!

lottiegarbanzo Thu 04-Apr-13 08:44:08

Some people have nothing better to do than fuss about 'their' bit of road and curtain-twitch. It doesn't often go hand in hand with good social skills.

Smile, ignore, sweep up when the car goes and forget all about him.

trixymalixy Thu 04-Apr-13 08:45:47

He's a nutter. Clean up the mess once the car has been moved and ignore the rest.

nitrox Thu 04-Apr-13 08:45:48

Sorry, the bay is actually outside his house, they are randomly spread down the road and there isn't one outside of our house unfortunately. Our neighbours on the other side mostly use the bays outside their house, so it's outside his house or further up the street which I sometimes have to use if the street is busy that day. Doesn't bother me, it's only him that has the problem it seems.

Moving house is for a few reasons, but mostly because of yesterday.. confused can't believe how ignorant some people really are.

I will clean up the mess, only because I was going to anyway and it's the right thing to do.

HollaAtMeBaby Thu 04-Apr-13 08:50:11

Dump the mess in his front garden, you know you want to grin

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