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to be worried that people won't be friendly

(4 Posts)
MysticMugBug Wed 03-Apr-13 16:49:12

I've had a tough time at school because i have always been different, but thankfully after a fulfilling and colourful time at university i feel alot better.
Luckily, in general i feel accepted for who i am and the fact that i have ADHD with hyperactivity is not something i worry about so much anymore. My university friends would not percieve me as a shy person, but quite outgoing, so it just shows how different social circles can change my mood.
However, when i am out of my comfort zone or meeting new people (usually outside of uni) i can get very stressed and can revert back to my previously shy and wimpering self. confused
I'm scared that people will be unfriendly, judgemental and bitchy.
This is something i have experienced both inside and outside of school and unfortunately still happens.
Obviously, i do try and avoid those types of people, but i am not always optimistic and can find it hard when i come back to my home town where i don't have many friends. blush
What's the best way to meet nice, friendly, laidback people?
I am aware that is partly psychological, but can someone share a similar experience or maybe suggest a solution?
Thanks guys

MrsLouisTheroux Wed 03-Apr-13 16:53:32

What's the best way to meet nice, friendly, laidback people?
Be those things yourself and be prepared to weed out those who aren't. Friendships evolve. People who want full on established friendships instantly are going to be disappointed. Just take your time to get to know people. smile

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Wed 03-Apr-13 16:55:42

Oh I'm the same as you! I'm very guarded as a result so lately I have been trying to just be myself..warts and all and if people don't like me...tough! It helps that I'm 40 now and care much less what others think.

I used to fear judgement until I realised that actually I am quite judgy myself! I try now...to stop judging others...to accept their faults and recognise my own similar ones. It helps a lot.

DontSHOUTTTTTT Wed 03-Apr-13 16:55:51

I think playing sport is a great way to meet people. Badminton, tennis, football - whatever suits you. (Keep fit classes re less good because you can't chat while you are exercising) You don't have to be any good. As you have something to focus on I find it a unthreatening way to meet new friends.

I guess choirs or musical groups would be good too.

You coud try a few different things and see what you enjoy. I think most sports groups offer free introductory classes.

Good luck.

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