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To want some people to just stop and think sometimes

(96 Posts)
PeneloPeePitstop Tue 02-Apr-13 16:31:56

How would you all like to have a life where day in, day out you are judged for existing and for doing your best for your family?

And then told to be grateful for it?

I've met some wonderful people here and I know that the vast majority of posters are decent.

But do some people really think that 'words on a screen' cause at the very worst tears?

Because when your whole life is filled with hatred, verbal and physical attacks then self harm and suicidal thoughts are also par for the course.

Just think about that.

AgentZigzag Tue 02-Apr-13 16:37:21

Sorry you're having a hard time of it at the moment, but as you said, the people who see it as only words on a screen are in the minority and most remember there's a real person behind the posts.

Try and concentrate on the people who can give you the support you need and ignore the one's who don't/can't.

ParsingFancy Tue 02-Apr-13 16:41:37


And those can be as un-MNetty as you like...

PeneloPeePitstop Tue 02-Apr-13 16:43:19

My benefits are not free money. They have cost me dear.

They've cost me my health, my self respect and my sanity.
They've cost me my family too as they weighed in with hate.

Yet people still envy that and are indignant we're not in the gutter.

ParadiseChick Tue 02-Apr-13 16:48:57

It's shit you've been made to feel like that. Some people have absolutely no clue.

ToupOfRegDwight Tue 02-Apr-13 16:51:04

I don't understand the whole benefit bashing attitude. They're there for a reason.

Flobbadobs Tue 02-Apr-13 16:52:29

Benefits are the one thing that gets everyone online and off foaming at the mouth thanks to politicians and rags like the Mail highlighting certain cases, people just trying to live get lumped in with whichever family the media have decided is undeserving or stealing food from the mouths of innocent poor people this week.
I'm not on benefits anymore and it fucks me off too, signing on at the jobcentre was soul destroying, the last time I did it I walked 5 miles through a snowstorm to get there as the buses had stopped. When I got there I got a lecture on how I presented myself and I should wear make up...
You're right, people should think but while a person can be smart, people can be stupid, it's a pack mentalilty to pick on the more vulnerable members of society at the moment.
((Hug)) to you x

Dawndonna Tue 02-Apr-13 16:53:18

Yes, and those of us who work 18 hour days, seven days a week should be grateful for them and less entitled, particulary as the people for whom we care are family.

I assume you are looking after your own families? Why do you assume it is the state's responsibility to look after them and you are doing us a 'favour' by looking after your partner/children yourself?

A quote from a thread on here today, directed at me.

Dawndonna Tue 02-Apr-13 16:54:09

Thank you PPP you have been fabulous today, sticking up for me on that thread, and I do appreciate it.

usualsuspect Tue 02-Apr-13 16:54:49

Some of the benefit bashing on MN is vile.

Hold your head up, and ignore the idiots who just quote the Daily Mail on here.

usualsuspect Tue 02-Apr-13 16:55:59

Feel pity that they are so thick they believe what they read in the trashy papers.

LittleAbruzzenBear Tue 02-Apr-13 16:58:34

I will have been a MNer for two years in December and for the most part they have been lovely. It's like high school though, there's always someone! Sorry to hear you've been on the receiving end of mean posts. Shit happens and circumstances change and this could happen to anyone, therefore I think 'walk a mile in their shoes.....' Ignore the ignorant ones.

Coconutty Tue 02-Apr-13 16:59:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PeneloPeePitstop Tue 02-Apr-13 17:00:34

Unfortunately I lost it.
It's not today that the dark thoughts crept in by the way but they have, too many times.

I just feel... Violent.

I've been told my kids should be euthanised, that in school they steal resources from other kids and that I am entitled, ungrateful scum.

I'm not supposed to have a life, just an existence, preferably in the gutter.

It's hard to not believe it when your own siblings join in.

WilsonFrickett Tue 02-Apr-13 17:01:42

I know it's really hard and sometimes the ignorance is shocking. However, for every bile-filled poster, there are usually hundreds of lurkers who are thinking and learning and empathising from others' situations. I know MN has challenged my thinking and I've learned from a lot of posters. I only pop on and off though so usually miss 'the moment' on the hot threads. (((hugs)))

FairyJen Tue 02-Apr-13 17:04:26

What Fred are you on about? [lost]

WorraLiberty Tue 02-Apr-13 17:09:47


Some people really can't see further than their own garden gates.

Most of us are just a redundancy/illness away from poverty and should be counting our blessings, instead of sneering at others.

PeneloPeePitstop Tue 02-Apr-13 17:10:57

Too many to list over the past eight years.

PeneloPeePitstop Tue 02-Apr-13 17:13:33

Well exactly, Worra.

I they and engage in actual debate and never get it.

For example on the bedroom tax thread I did explain as a former HR taxpayer and homeowner insured to the hilt that if it could happen to me then it could happen to anyone but they couldn't engage, just stereotype over and over again.

LittleAbruzzenBear Tue 02-Apr-13 17:13:55

Yes, Worra, well said.

ParadiseChick Tue 02-Apr-13 17:14:26

Worra you're a fine one to talk! Fair enough you don't hammer people on benefits but anyone else is fair game to you are they not?

MurderOfGoths Tue 02-Apr-13 17:14:31

<links arms with OP and others>

usualsuspect Tue 02-Apr-13 17:16:33

I don't think there was any need for that comment,paradise

poppypebble Tue 02-Apr-13 17:18:48


I was brought up in a council house by disabled parents. I now have a good job but I don't ever forget what that was like. This government has gone all out to portray all benefit claimants as 'shirkers' in the hopes of getting votes from the so-called 'strivers'.

Personally I've never seen anyone work as hard as a carer. The vulnerable in our society should be protected, not denigrated.

ilovexmastime Tue 02-Apr-13 17:20:07

Don't worry about them OP, they either have no emotional intelligence or no imagination, or both.

Try not to let them get you down, easier said than done I know.

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