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To think that if I can't go out, DH shouldn't either?

(30 Posts)
MomaP Fri 29-Mar-13 18:27:48

We was in town earlier, saw two mutual friends - another couple. We're down visiting family and friends ATM. DH is out every day with friends, like a bloody teenager, while I naturally look after our 5 year old DS. I haven't been out once!!

We said we would try and go, but theres nobody to watch DS, therefore we can't. However my cheeky shit of a husband has just said "Can I still go out" - WTAF?

WIBU to say HELL NO?
Why should he get to go, and not me?
I haven't been out anywhere, once. angry

CutePuppy Fri 29-Mar-13 18:31:22

So tell him the above and tell him you are going out?

willyoulistentome Fri 29-Mar-13 18:32:00

YADNBU. He's had his turn. Your turn now.

EostreChaoticResurrEggtion Fri 29-Mar-13 18:32:56

Tell him he can't go because you're going and go.

Fairylea Fri 29-Mar-13 18:33:22

Just tell him no you are going and go. Don't ask. Just go.

Why does he get to go out all the time? And why everyday?? That would drive me nuts. In fact that's one of the reasons I left dds dad. He always put his friends first. It was ridiculous.

morethanpotatoprints Fri 29-Mar-13 18:34:17

Can't you go and he stay in as they are mutual friends?
Why are you and your ds going out with his friends? He needs to be reminded of his priorities I think. My dh would not have behaved like this and we visited family and friends as we moved miles away from them.
Go together or take it in turns.
Tell him I said he's being very selfish and thoughtless.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Fri 29-Mar-13 18:34:49

He's having a laugh, right?

Why can't he look after his child while you go out, same as you look after the child while he goes out?

Why are you the permanent childcare, allowing him to come and go as he pleases?

Please ask him this.

And then leave him with his child and go see your friends!

HollyBerryBush Fri 29-Mar-13 18:35:00

Is it his home town you are visiting or a joint home town?

I fail to see why two people should be in being miserable when one can go out and catch up. Why can't you go out and leave DS with him?

morethanpotatoprints Fri 29-Mar-13 18:35:12

Sorry.
Why are you and your ds NOT going out with his friends

MomaP Fri 29-Mar-13 18:36:15

We wasn't invited individually, despite DH suggesting he went alone. Everyone going were couples.

Even if I wanted to go now, I can't because friends have moved on.

Bloody git.

He's got face on.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Fri 29-Mar-13 18:36:38

I assumed it was a late night thing that would be too late for a five year old. Adults relaxing and having a few drinks.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Fri 29-Mar-13 18:37:18

Mardy arse.

Has he said why it is him that goes out and about daily and why he thinks you don't want some time out?

HollyBerryBush Fri 29-Mar-13 18:37:32

Why can't you call old friends and ask if they want to meet up?

Are you in a hotel or staying with relatives? Coz I'd be leaving DS with MIL (or whoever) and going out too

Fairylea Fri 29-Mar-13 18:40:15

Can't you just go out anyway? Late night Tesco browsing and a McDonald's or something on your own and tell dh you met friends? He should have a taste of what he does to you.

comingintomyown Fri 29-Mar-13 18:40:41

XH was like this, god I dont miss him !

HollyBerryBush Fri 29-Mar-13 18:44:34

Take this back a step.

You have both gone to your joint home town to visit friends and relatives.

You say your friends have moved on - but - he still has friends he keeps in touch with.

You object to him going out with out you - but - you have no friends in this town any longer.

Either I'm spectacularly missing the point but why are you even on this little jaunt if you are getting nothing out of it?

I'm assuming you could go and see some (of his) relatives if you want company?

MomaP Fri 29-Mar-13 18:44:36

Joint hometown. Both our families are here. DH is out every day making music in one of his friends bedrooms.

The pub our friends were meeting in didn't allow children.

EggBasket Fri 29-Mar-13 18:45:25

Yanbu. Though if you're visiting family and friends, surely one of them can babysit so you can both go out?

HollyBerryBush Fri 29-Mar-13 18:46:05

Both families?

Why cant you send Ds to mum/dads/aunty so-sand-so's and go out as well

Where are you staying? with a relative or hotel/B&B?

Maryz Fri 29-Mar-13 18:46:22

Go on your own.

Seriously, he would, so why don't you?

And if not with these friends find some others to go and visit. You don't have to do everything as a couple.

And if you don't want to go out tonight, he might as well. Otherwise you will just be sitting glaring at each other.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Fri 29-Mar-13 18:49:11

Don't you have any of their mobile numbers?

INeedThatForkOff Fri 29-Mar-13 18:49:12

He sounds like a teenager.

MomaP Fri 29-Mar-13 18:50:29

I visit my family every now and again, however they aren't really people I like my DS around, for numerous reasons I don't care to go into.

My DH and I have mutual friends but they prefer him over me, always have. Probably because they're all lads. All my girl friends and I have all lost contact, I spend a lot of time with my SIL, sad I know blush

MomaP Fri 29-Mar-13 18:54:19

We stay with MIL and she was already watching my 1 year old nephew. She struggles to look after both my DS and DN at the same time.

My parents are busy helping my sister move into her new home.

Friends have now gone home, thats why DH is being childish.

aldiwhore Fri 29-Mar-13 18:56:50

So you're on holiday (of sorts) not that he's always out every night... hmm. Been there and it's bloody annoying BUT why can't 'the family' step in and let both of you go out?

Other than that YANBU.

Me and DH usually took in in turns, or at least, made sure it balanced out over the course of the week... if it's HIS home town you're visiting 'balance' is slightly more in his favour, but not ALL the way!!

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