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to think if you don't want a baby you use protection?

(92 Posts)
lovelylentils Wed 27-Mar-13 23:04:49

Dh is saying he does not want dc3 but keeps having unprotected sex with me even though he knows i do want dc3 and that i would not have an abortion.

Shesparkles Wed 27-Mar-13 23:06:14

To be honest, I don't think I'd be having unprotected sex with someone who didn't want a baby.

ZZZenAgain Wed 27-Mar-13 23:07:06

so what is his plan for when you get pregnant which will happen eventually?

RocksThatIGot Wed 27-Mar-13 23:07:46

He clearly doesn't not want dc3 that badly then. He must have figured out how it works by now.

serin Wed 27-Mar-13 23:07:55

You need to talk.

Tortoiseontheeggshell Wed 27-Mar-13 23:08:03

I assume you've said this to him? DH, I am not using contraception, and if I get pregnant then I am going to keep the baby?

CruCru Wed 27-Mar-13 23:08:11

Then either he secretly does want DC3 (or doesn't mind) or is an idiot.

Is he responsible for contraception? Does he know you aren't using the pill / IUD / diaphragm etc?

DoJo Wed 27-Mar-13 23:08:21

You should both stop having sex until you decide what you want. It's an awful way to bring a child into the world.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Wed 27-Mar-13 23:08:33

Arent you involved in this sex? Is he really just doing it to you? Is it just his responsibility?

SirBoobAlot Wed 27-Mar-13 23:09:22

Why are you continuing to have sex with him if you know this is a problem? You need to talk.

LadyBeaEGGleEyes Wed 27-Mar-13 23:09:29

Does he know what a condom is?

StuntGirl Wed 27-Mar-13 23:09:46

You need to have a rational, adult discussion with him.

And to stop having sex until you do.

This is no way to bring a child into the world.

ZZZenAgain Wed 27-Mar-13 23:10:33

Is he going to demand that you have an abortion? Is he going to leave you? What is he planning to do when you get pregnant? And what are you going to do? I know you want a baby but be careful you are not getting into something drastic here

SkinnybitchWannabe Wed 27-Mar-13 23:10:47

Sort out your own, its not all up to him.
Dont have sex..simple.

lovelylentils Wed 27-Mar-13 23:14:50

No he knows exactly how i feel. That i want dc3 and that i will not use contraception. He knows that if i get pregnant i will not have an abortion. He has an a level in biology ffs!
He's not stupid. And i make no appology for not running round sorting out contraception pills et that will make me ill when he can't be arsed to buy condoms

Pandemoniaa Wed 27-Mar-13 23:15:00

YABU. Sort this out yourselves before bringing an unwanted child into the world.

Iamsparklyknickers Wed 27-Mar-13 23:15:08

Well he's a twat then isn't he? You're not looking much better.

Tbh it sounds like you're both being ridiculous, you both know the consequences of what you're doing, passing the buck and passively aggressively both continuing to do something which will end in a huge argument and one party seeting with restment is just daft and childish.

Imho you could both do with trying out your grown up shoes and talking about it like the parents you already are and taking responsibilty for both of your own actions.

Why are you putting yourself in the position of potentially bringing a resented child into the world? Stop having sex with a man who isn't on the same page, it's as bad as being the man who doesn't want kids but doesn't protect himself.

Bloody stupid.

ZZZenAgain Wed 27-Mar-13 23:17:17

so then when you get pregnant you can say it was his fault. Well be careful. You have two dc to look after and you may find yourself with a third on the way and no husband.

People manage in that situation but it isn't ideal. You do sound a bit irresponsible to me, I'm sorry.

FannyBazaar Wed 27-Mar-13 23:18:12

Does he show responsibility towards other things or is he always happy for you to deal with the consequences of his actions. I think you need to talk. Talk about contraception and maybe more.

Dannilion Wed 27-Mar-13 23:22:01

'that I want dc3 and I will not use protection'.

I don't know if there are enough words to express how wrong that statement is.

Here, biscuit

CandlestickOlder Wed 27-Mar-13 23:24:21

You are both being incredibly unreasonable. Grow up.

Pobblewhohasnotoes Wed 27-Mar-13 23:25:56

You are both being ridiculous and acting like children. God help your future dc3.

shesariver Wed 27-Mar-13 23:28:04

And the reason you are having unprotected sex is......

beanandspud Wed 27-Mar-13 23:30:10

I'm sorry but you both need to have an adult coversation here.

You have two DC, why on earth would you consider having another child with a parent that didn't want him/her? Were your other children planned or were the circumstances similar to this one?

scottishmummy Wed 27-Mar-13 23:37:43

He doesn't have unprotected sex.*you both have unprotected sex*
You know be doesn't want baby yet ignore this?why dont you use protection?
no idea why you consider child with reluctant parent

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