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To be funding it hard to bite my tongue re weaning

(117 Posts)
HugeFloweryPants Wed 20-Mar-13 22:43:39

I accepted a long time ago that a friend and I parent differently and am quite happy with that, horses for courses. I breastfeed and go with the flow and she's a routine queen with 4 hour bottles etc. BUT I'm finding it hard to bite my tongue now we're on our second babies regarding weaning, she's well informed/ educated but has a big baby that 'needs' early weaning...but it's taken to extremes...
7/8 weeks baby rice
8 weeks rusks at bed time (trying to keep 4 hrs between bottles)
now 10 weeks
morning: eg porridge powder stuff
dinner: eg powdered meal by heinz (not seen but described)
tea: rusk

...and today exclaiming he's dropped a few centiles

I know I lentil weave a tad...but give me perspecrive, surely this is outside the norm and not a good idea? Mine would have been unfeedable then due to tongue thrusting.Or am I just not used to this as I've never bought ready made baby food?

WafflyVersatile Thu 21-Mar-13 02:01:29

seals are lovely and fatty.

hufflepup Thu 21-Mar-13 02:35:56

mmmmmm, seals.......

Judge away- clearly bonkers but I wouldn't say anything.

PurplePidjin Thu 21-Mar-13 04:02:54

It's none of your business.

And very very sad for the poor baby sad <judgy wedgie>

AThingInYourLife Thu 21-Mar-13 07:33:10

That's all very well, but you can create a severe seal allergy if you introduce it into a virgin gut.

Moominlandmidwinter Thu 21-Mar-13 09:01:21

Yanbu. This makes me feel judgy too, but I never say anything to the person in question. Somebody I know recently posted on FB how their 'lil soldier' was now a big boy, because he was having rusks at 10 weeks. Somebody else a few months ago kept posting about giving their baby solids from 7 weeks, a couple of months later was posting about their baby's hospital appointment for severe eczema hmm.

TheRealFellatio Thu 21-Mar-13 09:05:55

I started weaning all of my children at around that age, I was weaned at around that age, and probably you and most people over the age of 20 on this forum were too. It may not be what HCPs recommend now but honestly it is highly unlikely to so the baby any actual harm, so stop worrying about it and concentrate on your own children and let her worry about hers.

TheRealFellatio Thu 21-Mar-13 09:07:02

do, not so.

Mama1980 Thu 21-Mar-13 09:07:36

I'm afraid its none of your business. But- it would make me worry too, I weaned my very prem ds1 early due to a combination of factors (he had to have his bowel rebuilt etc.) but it was done on the advice if my dr and carefully monitored for reactions or any dropping off the centiles. And I have spoken with a early weaning friend who was horrified she wasn't following current advice and changed her mind but if your friend is well informed but has chosen I think you need t bite your tongue I'm afraid.

TheRealFellatio Thu 21-Mar-13 09:07:55

And personally I feel that leaving it until 6 months is too late. I don't actually care what the guidelines say.

noblegiraffe Thu 21-Mar-13 09:08:35

Can you not just say something like 'I've heard if they lose weight, giving more milk helps'? Not mentioning the bonkers early weaning at all. Or would any advice be stamped on?

HolidayArmadillo Thu 21-Mar-13 09:15:31

YANBU at all. She is obviously stupid. Inflammatory? Yes. But also true.

TheRealFellatio Thu 21-Mar-13 09:19:06

very very sad for the poor baby sad

Seriously, all of you who have babies now, presuming you are over 20 go and ask your mothers what age they starting giving you solid food. And then ask yourself if you think you should be the object of pity and concern over that, or whether you feel just fine and dandy and are suffering no obvious side effects.

Choose not to do it with your own babies by all means, but don't over-react as though it's some form of abuse or neglect.

tiggytape Thu 21-Mar-13 09:19:38

YABU - it isn't in line with current guidelines but your friend is allowed to make her own decisions. They are afterall guidelines not laws.

Things change all the time. The latest studies some say indicate harm from early weaning whereas 10 years ago early weaning was very common. It may all change (or be tweaked again) - who knows?!

The EAT study, mentioned before on MN and based at St Thomas’ Hospital in London, is looking at much earlier weaning (alongside continued breastfeeding) as a way of reducing food allergies. As part of the study babies are weaned at 3 months and also given foods traditionally thought of as 'bad' for babies like nuts and fish. Of course this is with regular check-ups and professional advice but the point is that nothing is final - research continues, guidelines change and in 5 years time it may all be very different.

Feminine Thu 21-Mar-13 09:24:04

Unless under instruction from a medical pro, I don't think she should be doing it.

I don't care what Mother's did before, research has to stand for something.

Actually, in the US weaning is not even suggested under 6 months!

My eldest is 14, at that time it was the norm to introduce solids at 4 months, I did. By the time I had my DD (10 yrs later) things had moved on. I took notice of latest info/help.

BTW, all of the first year is supposed to be an introduction to food...getting used to textures and learning how to eat.

Milk is supposed to be the main food for a long time after 4 months.

So...YANBU. not at all. smile

TheRealFellatio Thu 21-Mar-13 09:26:18

Absolutely tiggytape. I can't help thinking there is a link with the recent fad for late weaning and the avoidance of certain foods in the first two years with the prevalence of food allergies and intolerances.

tiggytape Thu 21-Mar-13 09:31:03

TheRealFellatio - that is totally the basis for the new research - that in Britain, we are told to wean later and also hold back introducing certain foods that children in other countries are given much earlier.
The study introduces solid food at 3 months (with breastmilk remaining the main food of course) and also introduces nuts, dairy, wheat and fish very early. The children will be followed until they are 3 and the presumption / hope is that these children will have lower incidents of food allergies as children elsewhere in the world do. Studies like this are an example of how guidelines may be tweaked or changed over many years and why what one generation of mothers follows and sticks to may not apply 10 or 20 years down the line.

Fluffycloudland77 Thu 21-Mar-13 09:31:58

I've got food allergies to cmp and I was on rusks at 2 weeks old because I woke at night.

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 21-Mar-13 09:32:09

I can't remember what age I waned ds now 17.
So that's how important it is in the scheme of things to me.

LadyBeagleEyes Thu 21-Mar-13 09:32:22


ICBINEG Thu 21-Mar-13 09:37:08

If baby is happy then YWBU to say anything. Given the baby is dropping centiles YWBU not to say anything.

wishingchair Thu 21-Mar-13 09:38:12

I have a 10 yo and a 6 yo. With the 10 yo the advice was to wean at 16 weeks so lots of us (on the advice of health visitors) were giving little bits of baby rice a couple of weeks earlier than that. By the time I had DD2 it had changed to 6 months. I made my own decision based on my knowledge of my baby and started solids prob around 17 weeks.

Things change. Neither child has any kind of allergy/skin/respiratory complaint whatsoever.

AThingInYourLife Thu 21-Mar-13 09:39:26

I'm 37. I was weaned at about 4 months.

I have no food allergies or intolerances.

I don't understand how you could get a 10 week old baby to eat solid food.

wishingchair Thu 21-Mar-13 09:39:31

(PS - I did make my own food though with the obv exception of baby rice ... e.g. puree pear etc ... and they were def not on 3 meals a day for quite a while)

sweetiepie1979 Thu 21-Mar-13 09:42:15

It's definitely not your place to say s

hackmum Thu 21-Mar-13 09:42:23

YANBU. I hate it when people say "it's none of your business". When does it become someone else's business? When they're slapping their child? Letting it starve? Locking it up in the cellar? Or is it always "your child, your rules"?

There's a reason for not weaning babies early - it's not some arbitrary whimsical thing dreamt up by health professionals to annoy parents. It's to avoid creating stomach and bowel problems later on. But if you do say something, you will seriously piss her off, and she probably won't change anyway.

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