DH's awful family part 2...

[curiousgeorgie]

So I've started a second thread as requested...

Who would have guessed that they would be so bad as to require more than 1000 posts

[exoticfruits]

Is there a link to part one? I haven't seen it.

[omletta]

Well done. And don't go to the wedding it's madness.

[mistlethrush]

I've just posted similar omletta

[curiousgeorgie]

This is a link to the first half...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1707730-To-not-want-PIL-to-stay-even-though-they-have-nowhere-else-to-go?msgid=37937235#37937235

[DontmindifIdo]

Is it overseas? It's highly unlikely you'll get a passport in order to travel with a 4 week old. Esp as you're talking about over June/July - that's one of the busiest time of year, it's just not going to arrive in time...

[PureQuintessence]

Dont go to the wedding!

Your inlaws sure knows how to snub you!

[GlaikitHasHerFizzBack]

go georgie! :o

blatantly marking place

[curiousgeorgie]

Well, after all this PIL situation that they caused, and now the secret CMV and total disregard, he's seriously considering telling them he doesn't want the job.

Just trying to work out the ramifications really.. But I'm really finished with them. I definitely don't want to go to their wedding even if it is just a couple of days.

[YouTheCat]

Don't go. Seriously, you owe them nothing and it could be dangerous if you've just had a c-section.

[AllOverIt]

Oooo a shiny new thread!

Definitely don't go. Blame the CS if you have to. Or just tell them they're fuckwits and you have better things to do with your time....

[FryOneFatManic]

It'll be the busiest time of the year for getting a passport.

Baby needs to be registered and have birth certificate before you can apply for passport.

At the best of times it's reckoned that you'll get passport back in 3 weeks.

With wedding being 4-6 weeks after birth, there's only the slightest chance you'll have a passport for baby.

This is your official reason not to go.

However you could send older DD with your DH, although it might spoil his golf n drinks thing a bit........

[curiousgeorgie]

I had already been concerned about taking the baby re passport issues & being able to book a seat. They suggested we drive but it works out at about 15 hours driving and there's no way DD would cope!! (or me!!)

I was prepared to grit my teeth and stad in line at the passport office, struggle through the wedding for their sakes and just ignore the massive cost... But now I'm of the mind that they don't care about us, why should I put myself out for them.

[DontmindifIdo]

Oh yes, tell SIL you are sooo sorry, you'd love to come to her wedding but of course, you won't have time to register the birth and get a pass port within 4 - 6 weeks so you can't go to the wedding, but don't worry, you aren't going to ruin it for her as DD is to be a bridesmaid, you'll send DH with DD on their own.

Of course, she'll have to let BIL know that dH will have ot be on DD duty so won't be able do the golf/drinks/staying with BIL the night before etc, but I'm sure he'll understand...

[FryOneFatManic]

15 hours driving!

At 4-6 weeks after a CS!

Ask your midwife for her advice on that and you'll most likely get a big fat NO from her.

a) could lead to blood clots, etc as for flying but over 15 hours risk would be higher

b) it's not recommended that babies are stuck in car seat for more than 2 hours at that point without significant breaks.

[YouTheCat]

Would you be driving? That's also not usually recommended 4 weeks after a section.

[ENormaSnob]

I absolutely wouldn't be putting myself out for that shower of bastards.

[GlaikitHasHerFizzBack]

It's Ireland you are going to isn't it?

I still think you were being very very optimistic to say you would be going in the first place.

What I really want to know, what was first, your pregnancy or the wedding plans? C'mon admit it, you got pg just so you don't have to go, didn't you!!

[curiousgeorgie]

I wouldn't send DD with DH... I'd worry bout her too much

Just because they seem to have so much planned for DH that couldn't possibly involve her, and with the best will in the world, DH is easily influenced by PIL and BIL! she'd end up being babysat by someone she'd never met. And PIL & DH are on the top table and shes not so I'd panic constantly!

[DontmindifIdo]

Even if it's driving, you'll still need a passport. And you won't get it in time. And you won't be fit to drive that far.

[letseatgrandma]

Have you booked a hotel, OP?

I haven't read the end of the last thread; are you now certain your in-laws know they aren't staying with you anymore?

[FryOneFatManic]

You've got loads of good official reasons not to go.

I wouldn't do it for this bunch, not at all.

[FierceBadIggi]

Do you actually need a passport? (If wedding is in the country I think it is). If it's just for identity purposes, the birth certificate would do on the plane.
NOT that I think you should go, but for me it would be the c section (I've had 2) and the newness of the baby that would stop me. I don't like exposing babies to lots of people beofre they've had some shots tbh, I know there are people everywhere but at a wedding I bet they'll all be having a cuddle.

[LittleMissFantabulous]

Shameless placenarking pompommery.

[curiousgeorgie]

Glakit - This sounds so much like a lie but I swear it's true! I even think I started a thread about it way back when... We were asked to have a break in TTC so we could go to the wedding. And this was after lots of miscarriages and I was luckily just starting to be treated by Mr Shehata, an amazing consultant and so taking a break would have been heartbreaking and ridiculous after I'd waited to see this doctor.

Yes, it's Ireland. I wouldn't have been driving, my DH would but it still would've been awful for DD and the baby.