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To expect people to take there shoes off? Sorry rant ahead!

(327 Posts)
Damash12 Sat 16-Mar-13 22:07:46

We've recently had a new carpet and it's not f@@;ing rocket science to see we have added a shoe rack near the back door but why do people look at you with a put out expression when they ask the question "do I need to take my shoes off?" and you reply "yes". And what's worse is those that know but still choose to walk in and just not bother or the best one, those that keep their shoes on and bloody tip toe around the place, like that makes it ok. I've actually had 1 visitor roll there eyes when I've asked them to come round the back, it's about 5 yards FFS!! Rant over!

MyDarlingClementine Sun 17-Mar-13 00:08:40

personally i just dont want to waste my time getting worked up over a carpet.

i have enough things to worry about - people to worry about I mean etc, i just wouldnt want the extra stress.

i do love the feel of persian rugs under foot, and i would love one one day, so if i took shoes off it would be so i could feel it, but i wouldnt get one if it meant sweating over its preservation.

i also dont get people with clumsy childrne who fill home with cream carpets etc.

BegoniaBampot Sun 17-Mar-13 00:10:17

It's so manky to wear shoes from outside into people's houses. Lived in Asia and everyone leaves their shoes at the front door, don't even think about it. Why wouldn't you?

OrbisNonSufficit Sun 17-Mar-13 00:10:55

Oh dear. YABU. Completely unreasonable. It's CARPET. It's not the end of the world if you have to vacuum up some dirt. I hate taking my shoes off in someone else's house, it makes me feel naked. Of course, if my shoes were dirty I'd take them off, or if the house was freakishly pristine I'd ask out of politeness if it was necessary, but I always feel like someone is putting house-proudness above hospitality when they insist on it.

bubbles1231 Sun 17-Mar-13 00:16:43

general rule to follow
remove your shoes if they are dirtier than the surface you will be walking on smile

tigerdriverII Sun 17-Mar-13 00:16:54

Ok. Haven't read all the thread but what I don't get is that when you are going out, surely one of the biggest parts of yr outfit is the shoes! So when you are going to a swanky dinner partee the last thing you want to do is remove your shoes. If you don't have dirty old filthy carpets, which are minging anyway (can you tell I don't like carpets) then there isn't much of a problem. I love this thread it happens every couple of months and is very cathartic

sneezingwakesthebaby Sun 17-Mar-13 00:22:00

The people who aren't bothered about shoes on carpet but would take visibly dirty shoes off in someone else's house, what about the stuff that isn't visible but will still be on your shoe? Like spit, bacteria, germs from dog poo that might not be visible but are there. That's the stuff that bothers me about my dd licking the outside floor or licking someones shoe so it would bother me if someone trod it into my house.

LRDtheFeministDragon Sun 17-Mar-13 00:32:55

I'm just curious, but where do people walk that their shoes are so filthy? I mean, I walk on ordinary city streets. And I have had bare feet on 'no shoe' homes, and my feet are black afterwards. What is the difference? Is it only that in the one case, the dirt is on my shoes, and on the other, it's on my skin?

Damash12 Sun 17-Mar-13 00:36:24

Omg, not for a minute did I expect such a vast amount of comments both slating and agreeing. Well, just to clarify a few things. Our front door leads straight onto the outside street so if wet/muddy the living room carpet gets it. Our last carpet looked a bloody mess and I was forever cleaning it so when we had our new carpet we made a rule to start using the back door. Secondly, I don't insist on people taking there shoes off, and I don't feel comfortable saying it although it is what I'm thinking :-/ . What I meant was if I saw someone had had a new carpet my manners would usually instigate me saying "ooh new carpet, shall I take my shoes off?" This does happen but when I reply "yes please" I get this sullen look as if to say "what really?"
What is wrong with wanting to keep something nice???? I worked bloody hard to pay for things in my home and I don't think it's wrong to expect people to respect that. Thirdly, yes I do have a rug and yes I do have an Hoover. I don't think this is a class thing it's more about manners although saying that I am over 40 and often visit centre parcs and yeah if i had another room it would be saved "for best" so eek maybe I do need to be on another thread about other issues. ;-)

Smudging Sun 17-Mar-13 00:43:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Smudging Sun 17-Mar-13 00:44:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ifancyashandy Sun 17-Mar-13 00:48:14

Surely one doesnt really expect people to remove shoes in ones pile house?

The staff are more than capable of dealing with any dirt that gets trailed in from the Boot Room, no?

LRDtheFeministDragon Sun 17-Mar-13 00:52:35

No, I don't smudging, but I can completely understand why someone who does own a dog might want to take shoes off (I walk dogs fairly often and get muddy), and I can understand why a person whose mate comes in from walking a dog might want that person to remove shoes.

But how is that different from any other normal person? Surely, you know if your shoes are mucky? confused

RambleOn Sun 17-Mar-13 00:58:56

Can I come to your house? I don't mind taking my shoes off. I do currently have verrucas and a fungal nail infection though grin

BegoniaBampot Sun 17-Mar-13 01:04:21

Take your fucking shoes off, you manky lot!

BeCool Sun 17-Mar-13 01:04:37

I don't understand why you would want people's smelly rancid veruca and fungal infested feet on your beautiful carpets. shock How disgusting!

(Personally my feet are gorgeous and fresh but lots of people aren't blessed with fragrant tootsies!)

DoJo Sun 17-Mar-13 01:14:04

The one thing I do know is tat a shoes on/shoes off thread always brings out people who are convinced that their way is right, and each side seems to have a roughly fair share of them.

LadyWidmerpool Sun 17-Mar-13 01:41:23

Just say nicely 'you can leave your shoes there'. It's not the norm in the UK, people won't guess.

Damash12 Sun 17-Mar-13 01:58:45

Well, I daren't even begin to start the thread 'people who have removed shoes curling their feet up onto my new sofa' :-/ PMSL (just kidding btw)

JenaiMorris Sun 17-Mar-13 06:51:20

Beveridgethat's interesting about dirt floors as opposed to mats.

Bare feet can be pretty grim. On or off is surely a decision a guest makes, based on the state of their feet vs their shoes.

Cream carpets in high traffic areas, especially if you have children, isn't very wise though, I must say.

DizzyHoneyBee Sun 17-Mar-13 06:57:33

I would always take my shoes off when going into a house, I think it is standard practice really - DC has a sleepover going on and all her friends took their shoes off without any mention of it.

It annoys me with the double standards some people have, I mean at my Mum's house she will wear shoes when her friends come to visit and they will keep their shoes on but the DCs and I are expected to take our shoes off if we are there at the same time. I hate the implication that her friends have clean shoes whereas we obviously do not. If they have their school shoes on then they will be just as clean as anyone else's shoes.

JenaiMorris Sun 17-Mar-13 06:59:53

It's a familiarity thing, Dizzy.

DizzyHoneyBee Sun 17-Mar-13 07:02:09

I guess so, I never really thought of it like that! Daft really...

ApocalypseThen Sun 17-Mar-13 07:11:06

I don't take my shoes off at home and I don't care whether anyone else does if they come in. I think the germs-on-shoes argument is disturbing though. Some people are really freaky about over cleanliness. It's not healthy to live in a sterile environment unless medically necessary.

trinity0097 Sun 17-Mar-13 07:24:06

I don't wear outside shoes at home but don't expect visitors to take their shoes off, they can if they want but I don't ask or expect.
I think it is reasonable to ask kids to take off shoes as they tend to be more likely to be muddy.

wigglesrock Sun 17-Mar-13 07:26:29

Do you know I have never been in a house where guests take their shoes off - ever and I'm no spring chicken. I take my shoes off in my own house but it's not a cleanliness issue it's a comfy one.

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