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in thinking the teacher shouldn't have clipped my 7 year old son around the back of his head in class

(108 Posts)
pingu2209 Fri 15-Mar-13 18:03:08

My son was being a little sod, no doubt, but should she really have clipped him around the back of the head.

He told me that he quietly cried into his school work after it had happened.

However, when I queried with the teacher this afternoon she said that it really wasn't hard at all and barely brushed him. She also said that his behaviour didn't improve either.

I'm not sure what I'm thinking really. Teachers used to clip me, I had board rubbers thrown at me etc. It didnt' do me any harm.

WorriedMummy73 Fri 15-Mar-13 18:07:38

Erm, I might be wrong, but isn't it illegal now? Fairly certain that came in when I was in late primary (and I'm 39!). I remember kids getting the 'pump' at my school, then it all stopped. Rightly so, cos the Deputy HT (doler-out of said punishment) was a sadistic so and so.

YouTheCat Fri 15-Mar-13 18:09:08

I was all set to say YABU but see you aren't just taking your ds's word for it and have spoken to the teacher.

Teacher needs to learn to keep her bloody hands to herself, and her temper.

chocolatespiders Fri 15-Mar-13 18:09:11

Oh my that is shocking... I was annoyed when my dd was stood up in front of class and told off- I do not approve of public humiliation in front of a peer group angry

RobinSparkles Fri 15-Mar-13 18:09:14

I thought that it was illegal too and an absolute no no to put your hands on a child!

StuffezLaBouche Fri 15-Mar-13 18:09:32

Pings, your reaction puzzles me.
You don't seem massively bothered by the corporal punishment your child appears to have received.
Eric, what are you intending doing about it?

Tee2072 Fri 15-Mar-13 18:10:02

Is this a thread about a thread?

StuffezLaBouche Fri 15-Mar-13 18:10:48

Eric?! Who the hell's he?!

YouTheCat Fri 15-Mar-13 18:11:45

Don't go bringing Eric into this! He wasn't even there and didn't even see anything. wink

YellowAndGreenAndRedAndBlue Fri 15-Mar-13 18:12:01

That is illegal if you are in uk. You should complain to Ofsted, lea and governors.

If this actually happened to my child I would withdraw immediately.

trinity0097 Fri 15-Mar-13 18:14:41

I sometimes will tap a child on the back of their head/shoulder/arm if they are doing something wrong, rather than use a verbal instruction if that might interrupt the flow of the lesson. It is not illegal to touch a child, regardless of what people think they know!

SnotMeReally Fri 15-Mar-13 18:15:39

OMG!! go straight to the headteacher on Monday morning

that should NOT be happening - was there a TA or other adult in the room at the time?

even if the strike was not very hard, its the humiliation side too, and the school should have a system of progressive sanctions for children who are not doing as they should eg warning, name on board, cross by name, miss play, ranging up to sent to HT

HollyBerryBush Fri 15-Mar-13 18:16:40

Well there are three years between DH and I - he remembers the lobbing of the board rubber and the slippered arse, I however do not.

These things always depend upon the relationship between teacher and child, a mock cuff which ruffles the hair if done in jest is not abusive (I'm sure someone will disagree with me).

I do find it difficult to believe a " little sod" would be "quietly crying" though

SnotMeReally Fri 15-Mar-13 18:18:07

Hmm, a tap on the head or shoulder to get attention is not the image conjurred up by the OPs use of "clipped round the head" - nor did the teacher try to explain THAT's what had happened, from what we have ben told so far, at least!

pingu2209 Fri 15-Mar-13 18:19:51

How my son spoke and how the teacher spoke were very different stories. Of course my ds said that she had hit him hard and he was very quiet and upset afterwards and he cried silently into his work. Do you hear the violins?!

Rather than escalating up the school to the deputy head etc I decided to speak directly to the teacher. I thought she must have been having a bad day and the children may have been really playing her up.

She said that it was a very soft brush of the back of the head and later in the lesson he started up giggling again. She said that he was disturbing the rest of the group he was working with.

I'm not taking it any further but at least she knows I know.

HollyBerryBush Fri 15-Mar-13 18:19:53

A "little sod" "quietly crying" and on improvement in behaviour. Can't be sobbing quietly and still running amok.

AmandaCooper Fri 15-Mar-13 18:20:21

I have known teachers be dismissed for less.

MyHeadWasInTheSandNowNot Fri 15-Mar-13 18:26:02

I'd tend to believe the teacher in this case tbh. I think your 'little sod' is playing you. As you know he's a 'little sod' I'd be inclined to back the teacher in front of him as well... get the 'little sod' behaviour in line before he gets any bigger.

TheNebulousBoojum Fri 15-Mar-13 18:28:43

So people here are still taking the child's word for it, and the parent is the one being sensible about it?
I've been known to touch a chatty child on the head with a forefinger, usually when they don't know you are there. Literally a touch on the head.
Roll on the next decade and we will have cctv in all classrooms.

pingu2209 Fri 15-Mar-13 18:29:57

I sound really harsh about my children! He is not badly behaved and has never had his name on the board even. However, I know when he is with other boys he gets very silly and very annoying; poo and bogy talk etc.

One boy was pulling silly faces and made him giggle, along with others. However, the teacher didn't write his name on the board but instead clipped him around the back of the head.

It was the first time this has ever happened and I have never heard other parents talk about her hitting their children. For this reason I don't want to set the hares running by going to the head etc. I wouldn't want to affect her career or give her a black mark for a one off event, when I can sympathise with her totally if a handful of 7 year old boys were getting sillier and sillier in class.

Yes she was wrong. I am shocked really.

I think the fact I raised it with her directly but didn't get angry will make her think that I am aware and he does tell me. It should make her think twice.

My exact words to her were "if he is being badly behaved please tell me and if he needs a clip round the ear I will do it for you."

StuffezLaBouche Fri 15-Mar-13 18:30:30

Of course my ds said that she had hit him hard
Curious, if it emerges the 'clip' was a tap on the back of head or shoulder, will you be disciplining your son? 'Hit him hard' is a serious allegation.

HollyBerryBush Fri 15-Mar-13 18:32:01

Let me tell you a story about pupil exaggeration.

Pupil, 15, (known corridor floater and lesson avoider) affecting the 'woe is me, clutching general stomach area' air of pathetic-ness.

I have a very good relationship with her.

Me "wassaup??"
Her: " I got my period and it reaaaaaaaaaaaally hurts"
Me: "awww (I do do empathy you know!) Did mum give you any paracetamol before school?"
Her: "yeah"
Me "is it maths now by any chance?"
Her (giggles) "yeah!"
Me: "you better scoot off to lesson before you get caught bunking again! and remember you have 40 years of this ahead of you" grin

Upshot, taken to hospital that night, lost half her bowel and intestines, all sorts of complications.

She tells mum that I'm lovely and I took her to the sick room, sat with her, and stroked her hair till she felt well enough to go to lessons shock

This NEVER happened - fortunately we have CCTV everywhere so I never got sacked for that level of inappropriate behaviour - but I might have done in a previous era.

pingu2209 Fri 15-Mar-13 18:33:34

I reckon it was an open handed brush across the back of his head. Not hard but more than a glance.

I will be speaking to my son and telling him nobody should hit him, or him hit anyone else. However, it is not acceptable to disturb other people working and he is there to learn, not giggle. He has breaks to giggle in.

MyHeadWasInTheSandNowNot Fri 15-Mar-13 18:41:30

He has breaks to giggle in grin

twofaceshenanigans Fri 15-Mar-13 18:50:12

I am shock at the pearl clutching that s going on here.

She didn't 'hit' him she 'clipped' him. Anyone would think she'd beaten him.

My DD teacher poked her in the back when she was chatting when she should have been listening, her teacher came and told me she had done it, I then proceeded to tell DD that maybe if she was doing as she should have been doing (listening) to her teacher it wouldn't have happened and then she apologised to her teacher (with no prompting)

Teachers have a tough enough job as it is.

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