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To think asking for expensive gifts for Mothers day is greedy?

(130 Posts)
MomaP Sat 09-Mar-13 21:06:31

Im sorry if you disagree, actually, no I'm not! envy

I have just witnessed two friends of mine, on facebook say they have convinced their DH's to buy them an ipad for mothers day!! WHAT? hmm

Both women have 2 DC, who are all under the age of 5. Am I missing something?

My DS made me a present at school this week, its in DS possession, ready to give me tomorrow, I am SO excited. grin What ever this present is, I know its made by him, that means more to me than anything - it is something I will, without a doubt keep forever. Sentimental gifts/cards are what mothers day is about, or well, it used to be anyway.

AIBU to think anyone expecting things like ipads etc are greedy and have no appreciation for mothers day, its just about material items to them?


didireallysaythat Sat 09-Mar-13 22:20:50

I'd forgotten it was mother's day tomorrow.

Have I left it too late to circulate my Amazon wish list ?

Who knew ?

MomaP Sat 09-Mar-13 22:26:09

MsWetherwax - that's different.

You're an adult, bought her something that would make her happy and you're a little to old for home made gifts/cards. It's different for the simple reason that she didn't ask/expect a laptop, as an adult, you've still chose to spoil your mom in your own special way.

landofsoapandglory Sat 09-Mar-13 22:26:34

I don't see the problem with it, TBH. Their DC might have made them something as well.

My DC have bought me Pandora charms from this years Mother's Day collection. I have had years of homemade cards and bunches of flowers when they were smaller, but now they are older and we have a little bit more money so it's different.

I couldn't careless what other people get for Mother's Day, it's their business not mine.

SashaSashays Sat 09-Mar-13 22:30:53

Oh come on OP, stop being so sanctimonious. Making something special for mummy give me a break. Not everyone has the time or inclination, not all DCs do either. 2 of my dc hate crafty type things. Most homemade gifts are now done at school anyway.

How do you know that their DH hasn't taken the dc with them to the shops, thats what I know my DH has done and what I usually do? How do you know they haven't all wrapped it together? How do you know it doesn't come with homemade cards and gifts? Its not definitely one or the other, I will probably get brought breakfast in bed (which I will have dutifully sat in bed for hours waiting for) which will probably involve a horrendous attempt at scrambled eggs, a tepid cup of tea and some unbuttered toast, I will then be handed my shop bought presents and homemade cards.

Also have you considered the fact that an IPad could be a family gift and something the children get use out of too.

An iPad!!! Ridiculous. I know the type.

I am thrilled, thrilled!!! Because I know I've got a wooden framed cold frame. I didn't expect anything! DH bought it because he knew I wanted it & I've been gardening with DD.

Dd (3) made me two gorgeous cards (1 from her & 1 from her wee brother 11mo smile ) & a peppermint cream, studded with bogeys chocolate. I was so chuffed.

123caughtaflea Sat 09-Mar-13 22:36:47

I really don't care what anyone else gets.

My mother (I am single) has organised something with my son (I suspect it's a mug).

But more importantly, my son, who has attachment disorder and usually writes "To mum, from X" has written "To mum, I love you very much, from X" in his card (yes, I peeped). That is more than enough for me, really.

He is very upset about an issue with a friend tonight and I suspect he will be in a foul mood tomorrow. Such is life.

On another note, I made an example Mother's Day card to show my Reception class what I was planning for them to do (though mine was, I trust and hope, rather better quality - technically speaking - than what they produced) and I sent it to my mother (who else after all?). It was a touch more sentimental than I would normally indulge in and my mother (who I thought was the world's most unsentimental!) has been more enthusiastic than I can ever remember her being about anything (she evidently peeped too!) If I'd known that a Reception-style Mother's Day card would please her that much I'd've done it years ago! (She did get a proper present too - well, it's a (huge, china) pig, but that's proper for her!)

pixwix Sat 09-Mar-13 22:38:36

I'm divorced from ex, although we get on well. He had them on Thursday, and today, we were listening to the radio when mothers day stuff came on. I have the boys this weekend.

Ds2 (9) was wide eyed, and rushed off to confer with Ds1 (15) - I couldn't help overhearing him say... "Ds1 - Ds1! mums going to think she hasn't got anything for mothers day and we HAVE! cos dad helped us!!" They wander back, and Ds1 says "erm mum? don't worry about mothers day - we are sorted!"

I wasn't worried btw! a card would be lovely, but ex and I always remind the boys for mothers/fathers day respectively.

Bless them! grin they are plotting and scheming! they keep going off into corners to whisper...

The best thing is though - they both tidied their rooms as a run-up event, got the hoover out, and Ds1 (15) used the carpet washer and washed their carpets! Go figure! grin

If my ex wasn't so inclined as to coordinate cards and such-like, that would be fine - cos they are always very solicitous and lovely on mothers day!!

sukysue Sat 09-Mar-13 22:45:17

each to their own really.

MomaP Sat 09-Mar-13 22:46:46


Can I remind you of my point? It's mothers that expect, have ASKED for such expensive gifts that come across as greedy to me.

Prioritise such gifts over a true sentimental gift from their children? As another poster said, it's nobody else's business what DH's/DC actually CHOOSE. But it's the mothers that expect or ask for such expensive, completely inappropriate gifts for such a loving, appreciative day such as Mothering Sunday that actually make me cringe for their lack of sentimental value.

I also want to add that one of the friends hasn't been given home made/shop bought gifts because she told me this over coffee this morning. She had no interest in Mother's Day other than being able to wake up to a brand new iPad in the morning. Unreal.

PoppyAmex Sat 09-Mar-13 22:47:31

This will be my first Mother's Day ever and I don't give a shit about anything but the fact that I'm finally a mummy! grin

pleasesleepallnight Sat 09-Mar-13 22:47:51

DD3 decorated three biscuits in nursery for Mothers Day........went to unbuckle her from.the carseat and was handed 3 buscuits with a scraping of soggy icing left on them (including the little lines where she'd dragged her teeth along to get as much of the icing as she could!)

Don't you just love them grin

BreasticlesNotTesticles Sat 09-Mar-13 22:50:16

Some people equate cost with love, so someone must REALLY love you if they spend lots of money on you.

When of course it means nothing of the sort.

If the vein of another poster dd1 made me a biscuit, I asked if I could have some - she refused. I asked if she would share it with dd2, but she said "i made it, it's MINE!" and stuffed it in her gob.

People who have to brag online, often have the least in reality. Feel happy in the knowledge that you and yours are okay and will have a lovely day.

pixwix Sat 09-Mar-13 22:51:01

poppyamex that's lovely! grin enjoy!!

pleasesleepallnight am pmsl!! [grin}

MomaP Sat 09-Mar-13 22:53:42

PoppyAmex, Your post has made me smile grin

My dad asked me what I wanted for Mother's Day so he could help my son choose. I asked for a new purse, and will be happy with whatever they have chosen, purse, snow globe or whatever my son has fallen in love with (yes even a moshi monsters cd) grin. I will also have breakfast made for me. But if ds wasn't bothered, I really wouldnt care much. It isnt what I get, but the love he gives me that is important, and that is there whatever day it is. I would also never ask for anything expensive. Money doesnt show love.

jeanmiguelfangio Sun 10-Mar-13 06:20:55

Mother's Day isn't really a big deal to me, then again I only became a mummy on Monday. I got poop for Mother's Day and I'm pretty chuffed because of my uncomfy baby for 48 hours!!
personally I hate the materialism of it all, buy an iPad cos you want/need one, don't add a Mother's Day excuse to it. Isn't it supposed to be about mum and children? Then again I know plenty of people like this, all about what you have physically and not actually what you have.

butterfliesinmytummy Sun 10-Mar-13 06:28:28

Dds are 4 and 8. I got 2 home made cards, peppermint creams made at brownies (only 4 because apparently they had to taste them first!) and a ticket to a dance show (jumping around to Abba) that they put on before breakfast ... Lovely!

davidtennantsmistress Sun 10-Mar-13 06:35:13

Both of the boys have made me cards in nursery and school, I went to nursery with ds2 for a Mother's Day morning, and there is a gift for me in the boys room, ds1 wanted to get up with ds2 so I could have a lay in, which is so lovely of him and very thoughtful, I was just made up at the gesture, as it is we've compromised I've got up with ds2, and he's going to make me breakfast in bed...... Read that. As its all laid out on the table, so all he has to do is carry it into me, as I'll be in bed pretending to be asleep, and we can all eat it and watch tv in bed.
Mothers d ay isn't about huge gifts, although I also have a friend who's partner got her ugg boots, flowers and a tiffanys bracelet, me m happy with their own ideas and thoughts nix things.

ThePigOfHappiness Sun 10-Mar-13 06:41:23

Dp will get me a card and chocs from my girls, but dd1 had made me a card, and I love it. I have all her homemade cards from crèche and school, and will when dd2 starts too. I love looking at her handwriting progressing and how she always draws me with lovely eyelashes!
The big presents from dps I don't get either, it's all the same money? I went a bit Ott for dp at Christmas because it was my first one working and wanted to treat him for being so lovely, when he asked me what I wanted for my birthday last week I said a car, but I need one for work anyway and am paying all the bills and rent this month so he can technically buy it for me!

Backtobedlam Sun 10-Mar-13 06:47:36

YANBU-I think Mother's Day is just a day to show your appreciation so a token gift (either home made, box of chocolates, cd) or something similar is perfect. With Christmas, birthdays, Easter, Mother's Day, Father's Day...where does it all end?! Spending money on flash gifts has never equated to more love.

GirlOutNumbered Sun 10-Mar-13 07:00:24

YABU. They may get something homemade too and anyway it isn't any of your business and your post stinks a bit of jealousy.
My two year old hates doing art and craft and so I will get a bit of paper with a scribble on, I really am not going to cherish that for ever and ever!

IneedAsockamnesty Sun 10-Mar-13 07:05:51

I don't really give a shit if someone else gets expensive gifts its nothing to do with me.

I'm perfectly happy with my plasticine plate and Xbox points ( that i paid for I neither have a Xbox myself nor do I play ds's) he brought them to distract himself and give me some peace and quiet, and the bath I will have with out disturbance when the grown up dc arrive.

Boasting is a bit crap but so is getting all antsy about a gift someone else gets.

Then again I've just come from another thread where someone else said that mums who expect anything or any extra attention are eye rollingly princessey and they need to get a grip so I guess its each to there own.

KatyTheCleaningLady Sun 10-Mar-13 07:50:14

I must be an alien or something.

I would much rather have an ipad than a handmade card my kids were told to make for me because someone decided that this Sunday is significant.

My kids love me. They show it all the time in many ways. I don't need them to be instructed to make something decorative for me just because it's a so called holiday.

But, if my husband wants to give me an ipad under the pretext of it being a special day, I say bring it on!

DeskPlanner Sun 10-Mar-13 07:51:56

pixwix your boys sound lovely grin

popcornpaws Sun 10-Mar-13 07:52:47

My Dd is sixteen now and i still have all the homemade Mothers day/Easter/Xmas cards that she made for me over the years.
She also used to write me letters telling me what she liked about me!!
I look through these occasionally and they always bring a smile to my face.
Nowadays it will be chocs and flowers but still a homemade card as she knows how much i love them.
Your friends sound greedy and the fact these conversations are taking place on fb says it all i think!!

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