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WIBU to say no to this dad?

(151 Posts)
TidyDancer Sat 09-Mar-13 19:06:16

This happened earlier this week, and is actually quite trivial. DP thinks I was being a bit mean, so I thought I'd throw it out there!

I was walking through my local shopping centre after work when a small child (3 or 4 at most) took a shine to my bag. In all fairness, it is a rather lovely bag. It's a pink tote bag with a penguin on it. I use it for my lunch and some odds and ends on work days.

Anyway, aforementioned small child squealed in delight at my bag and I smiled as I passed her. Next thing I knew, the father of the child was tapping me on the shoulder and asking me if his DD could have my bag! I was a bit taken aback tbh, and said that I was sorry, but no, she couldn't have it. I was perfectly nice about it, but walked away to get the car. As I was leaving, I heard the dad say to his DD "sorry darling, the mean rude lady said no". There was crying following this.

Was it really unreasonable of me to not want to give away my bag? It was not a free bag and I was quite stunned tbh.

Any opinions? smile

germyrabbit Sat 09-Mar-13 19:07:53

what a weird thing to ask! he could have just asked you where you got it!

AmberLeaf Sat 09-Mar-13 19:08:55


How rude of him to even ask, he should have asked you were it was from and got his own!

Really weird!

mrsstewpot Sat 09-Mar-13 19:08:55

Eh? Seriously?

No - the dad was being completely unreasonable purely for asking nevermind the rude comment.

Pilgit Sat 09-Mar-13 19:09:20

No YANBU! Children need to learn they can't have everything they want, just because they want it. Some people are unbelievable!

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Sat 09-Mar-13 19:09:46

YANBU at all! What an arse of him to call you mean and rude, never mind to have asked in the first place. That child is going to grow up with a very strange and grabby attitude.

WipsGlitter Sat 09-Mar-13 19:10:34

Blimey!! How odd.

TidyDancer Sat 09-Mar-13 19:10:53

Ah unanimous so far! I thought it was odd, then DP saying I was a meany made me think twice!

Thank you all. smile

MurderOfGoths Sat 09-Mar-13 19:10:56

YANBU, why on earth does your DP think you were mean?!

TidyDancer Sat 09-Mar-13 19:11:51

I'm afraid it is serious. I do wish it wasn't though!

I have asked someone before where they got a piece of clothing etc, but I've never asked them if I could have it!

woopsidaisy Sat 09-Mar-13 19:11:56

Every time you think you have heard it couldn't make it up.

catgirl1976 Sat 09-Mar-13 19:12:42

YANBU at all

The dad was odd and if the girl doesn't learn that you can't have everything you want I dread to think what she will be like sad

TidyDancer Sat 09-Mar-13 19:12:55

I think because a child cried, MoG. I did point out that it wasn't really my fault the tears happened!

HecateWhoopass Sat 09-Mar-13 19:12:58

bloody hell.

No, you were not unreasonable.

He, on the other hand was not only unreasonable, he was ridiculous and barking bloody mad.

Your partner thinks you were a bit mean to not hand over something that belongs to you to some stranger who asked for it?

Send me a description of your partner and I'll keep an eye out for him and ask him for his tie when I see him! grin

lumpybumps Sat 09-Mar-13 19:13:21

What an odd man! Surely that's no different than me walking up to someone and saying- that's a lovely coat you are wearing- can I have it? gringrin

minkembra Sat 09-Mar-13 19:13:28

Yanbu. he was just being to lazy to set some boundaries for husband kids. sooner he learns the easier husband life will be.
You did him a favour.

His name wasn't Mr Salt was it? ;-)

xigris Sat 09-Mar-13 19:14:22

Really? That's completely mad! To ask where you got said penguin bag, yes, to ask you to gaily hand it over, No! I may, however train DS1 to tell ladies how much he likes their Mulberry bags and to ask if he can have them! Never know, he may get lucky. You are absolutely NBU. What a bonkers scenario.

thornrose Sat 09-Mar-13 19:14:59

This is the one of the oddest things I've ever heard! YA SO NBU. I can't believe your dpi thinks you were being mean confused

WilsonFrickett Sat 09-Mar-13 19:15:15

shock that's outrageous! You were so not BU. How entitled is that child going to grow up to be?

minkembra Sat 09-Mar-13 19:15:43

Wonder if i could train my kids and use this as a new for of non violent mugging.

Maybe the kids name was Olivia Twist and he wasn't her dad at all....

expatinscotland Sat 09-Mar-13 19:17:00

I'd have told him to fuck off.

Spatsky Sat 09-Mar-13 19:17:19

It sounds so ridiculous that I am wondering whether there was a misunderstanding.

What were his exact words? Could he in fact have meant have a hold of your bag, or a close up look at the bag, or similar??

Even if so, you were of course well within your rights to say no.

LindyHemming Sat 09-Mar-13 19:17:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ZenNudist Sat 09-Mar-13 19:19:19

Yanbu. Apart from the entitled & grabby attitude he is cultivating in his dd, wtf did he think you were going to do with the stuff in your bag!?

Weirdo. And v.rude

TidyDancer Sat 09-Mar-13 19:20:27

I was too stunned to give him any kind of rudeness in response. His balls at saying it just surprised me! He really did not see anything wrong in what he had asked.

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