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to state 'Happily married people do not update facebook very often''

(77 Posts)
sosooootired Fri 08-Mar-13 20:53:47

i am sick and tired of all my smug f-in fb 'friends' constantly haring how f-ing 'happy' they are...
i don't believe the half of it...i am sat home on a friday night looking at fb because my fucker of a 'dh' is a..well whole other i know that if i was as deliriously happy as they all reckon they are i would be nowhere near fb.


coralanne Sat 09-Mar-13 08:33:10

I often wonder the same thing about MNgrin

Truely, I often wonder if people are living parallel lives on MN.

At lease on FB you know the people are real people. I very rarely post. I only have family and a few really close friends.

As I live by myself (happily most of the time) it keeps me up to date with family who don't live close by.

I also send private posts to my DD so tht she can answer in her own time.

My DM invariably phones me just as I'm walking in the door from work, eating my dinner or just going to bed.

I don't want to do this to my DD because she's too lovely to fob me off (unlike me with my DM grin)

threesypeesy Sat 09-Mar-13 08:14:28

im guilty of most of above! not all the time but i do gush at times how amazing my dh is and he genuinely is! he also buys the most amazing presents and i will post pictures never thought it might annoy other. but were a very close happy couple even after 12 years and 3dds tbh were the same in real life when out with friends joined at the hip in a happy bubble. i can see it would be annoying if people done this often though when you know they have problems

stopgap Fri 08-Mar-13 23:57:38

I use FB almost daily and I'm happy. I don't do ranting and the like, just post pictures of my toddler for my family's benefit (I live 3000 miles away).

twitchycurtains Fri 08-Mar-13 23:51:39

There is one couple on my fb who are the most gorgeous couple ever, not only are they the most photogenic 2 people ever (the feckers) but they seem so in love, all their friends comment on what a cute couple they are and how in love they seem in person. They post the most wonderful photos from the most glamourous locations and just seem like they are genuinely in love and happy, I love stalking reading their status updates.

twitchycurtains Fri 08-Mar-13 23:48:25

DH's best friend has been on the phone a lot lately moaning about his wife and how she is doing his head in and how they are arguing so much and he doesn't think they will "make it" and how she keeps telling him she is so unhappy with him, however the wife is constantly to be found on fb writing overly soppy statuses about home life, her "darling hubby" and how happy she is. I would feel sorry for her but seeing as she has always come across as "my shit don't stink" type, I can't help but chuckle when I see the latest status update about her life.

rockinhippy Fri 08-Mar-13 23:45:25

Ah, that makes more sense - I don't really have anyone on my own friends list that do that TBH, one couple who we know do it, goeey at times, but its very tongue in cheek! playing the 50s housewife to the tee whilst he poses with his jumper & pipe, photos & all, but its for fun, he doesn't even smoke - though TBH I've got a short attention span for anyone using FB in a way that winds me up & I just delete them, such as the friend who is lovely in real life, but amongst other things kept banging on about her being a designer & having designers block & needing inspiration etc etc - she makes & sells simple things she copies from tutorials, for barely any profit - & the long time friend who kept posting rants about needing new friends as her old ones were crap - she lost one instead

& no not my own dog, smile but I've a couple of friends that are prolific posters & constantly about their dog, usually in various outfits - barking mad - literally grin but entertaining - but I like my shoe fetish & travelling friends pictures the best & you are right, its fantastic for keeping in touch with people smile

BegoniaBampot Fri 08-Mar-13 23:33:36

My husband isn't on my friends list either. Was for a little while and he pissed me off so defriended him. Now I can't keep an eye n him, big mistake!

sosooootired Fri 08-Mar-13 23:18:00

i would love to see a photo of you dog in his jumper rockinhippy

sosooootired Fri 08-Mar-13 23:15:28

and i'm not even considering stepping away from fb.. why would i? i like keeping in daily, minute by minute contact with former neighbours, uni friends, old colleagues, friends of friends and lesser family members
i won't have time to when my own sorry life perks up wine

sosooootired Fri 08-Mar-13 23:08:29

i don't think i'm so definitely 'wound up' by all this gooey true love pda - more commenting upon it and not swallowing..

rockinhippy Fri 08-Mar-13 23:07:12

Shit, I'm happily married & enjoy all the foody silly valentine, my cute dog in his jumper, latest recipe success, look at my cocktails, my DP bought me this posts - but then I'm not bitter & twisted & think live & let live & enjoy the tongue in cheekness of it all - confused

rockinhippy Fri 08-Mar-13 22:57:46

YABU - I can see why it wind you up if you arse unhappy in your own relationship, but that doesn't make it fake, perhaps just not what you want to see, selfish though, you're miserable so you think anyone who appears not to be is fakesad

Some may well be fake of course, but so can some of the bitchy snipes too, but you'd probably enjoy those if this OP is anything to go by - DH & I have done that in jest before & had it taken too seriously & then had certain "friends" bitching about us being common for airing our dirty laundry in publicgrin - missing the point completely

so if someone is bitter & twisted enough to take things the wrong way, in face ache land you can't win

Maybe you should just stay off it for a while if its winding you up, that's what I would do

LadyPessaryPam Fri 08-Mar-13 22:54:26


mrsjay Fri 08-Mar-13 22:46:33

I had a friend have a her and her husband joint account the other day I didnt friends them, I was confused why she would have a joint facebook with her husband

aldiwhore Fri 08-Mar-13 22:46:06

I sometimes mention DH on FB, FB is my link to people I rather like, DH lives with me and I like him, a lot. DH isn't on FB.

I spend a lot of time on FB. I am happily married. Happier than I actually say on FB, though I'm never negative or do those evasive status updates.

YANBU entirely, because it is annoying to see badly worded lovesick pointless posts all the time, but YABU to think you can't be utterly delriously happily married AND enjoy regular FB time.

GreenEggsAndNichts Fri 08-Mar-13 22:43:05

Now that I see what you mean, I totally agree. I'm happily married. I post on FB (I live overseas from my family and old friends so I use it for keeping in touch.) However, I don't post on FB about how happily married I am. DH would think I'd lost it.

The ones who post pictures of what gifts they've received always seem to be the ones in struggling relationships. I'm not sure if they're trying to convince us or themselves of how great their man is.

Then of course there's the ones who need to re-post strangely sappy pictures proclaiming how amazing it is to be in love and be loved etc. I'm glad you're in love. Why not go tell your DH that, privately?

sosooootired Fri 08-Mar-13 22:36:09

thankyou fakebook, i genuinely lurve you grin my photo-baker obviously has a subtext of 'look how brilliant and fulfilled i am' i baked 20 different vegan delights, sewed my kids spring wardrobe, cooked soup for homeless, yoga-d and probably birthed 20 people whilst you were sat there doing nothing meaningful. i know it's not a big deal in the greater scheme but it does irk me on t'internet level

LadyPessaryPam Fri 08-Mar-13 22:35:46

I am happily married too, but that doesn't immunise you from life.

LadyPessaryPam Fri 08-Mar-13 22:35:11

Nobody who is happy posts about being happy, they may post about what they are doing though. Just ignore and hang on in there, most of us are doing the same.

MrsDeVere Fri 08-Mar-13 22:35:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fakebook Fri 08-Mar-13 22:31:50


Pilgit Fri 08-Mar-13 22:31:41

Happily married. On Facebook a lot. Have small children so will usually be in. Do I tell DH i love him via FB? No! Do I brag about it? No! use it to keep up to date with friends (so I can pretend to have a life!). Probably not relevant but after 4 glasses of wine I'm not sure what is....

mrsjay Fri 08-Mar-13 22:29:51

the next step is after sex picturess fakebook watch out for them <bleurgh>

Fakebook Fri 08-Mar-13 22:27:30

I know mrsjay, and I look forward to the soppy birthday messages from the offending friends every year. It makes a good laugh.

This valentines, an old school friend put up a picture of a candle-lit dinner and her bed, with rose petals arranged on it to make a heart with tea lights and a caption "thank you dh for a lovely dinner and lovely night"...the mental images I had were just sickening. Honestly, why would you put up a picture of your bed for all to see? confused

MooMooSkit Fri 08-Mar-13 22:27:04

Not really. Sometimes I'm at work and I'll get home and log onto FB and a status will be there from my OH something usually like, "Off to do so and so while the missus is at work, missing and love her lots!" or something like that. Didn't even think twice that people would sit there and think "oh god they must have issues to post that on FB" i'll do a status like that every so often, but not on it's own, it's usually if something good has happened like the OH has got some work or something good has happened and will mention I love my oh as well as my family.

we don't tend to write things on each other's wall much, it's usually random stuff like quotes from the mighty boosh if we aren't together. grin

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