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To NOT buy this toy for ds because it is a girl's toy?

(110 Posts)
Whatsdoneisdoneisdone Mon 04-Mar-13 17:42:56

Ds is just over three and a half. He has a chart for good behaviour and a few small chores. Once his chart is full every month or so he gets to choose a little prize for around ten pounds. Since he started the chart a few weeks back the thing he has wanted is the my little pony train. And at the moment it is on offer massively reduced on amazon.
He likes trains. He likes ponies. In his mind it seems a good plan. However I am not so keen. Not because it is a "girls'" toy really (we have many toys that could be considered traditionally a girls' toy) and I firmly believe that children should be able to play with what interests them. Usually.
I'm just a bit concerned he may be laughed at by other boys. Ds has stayed home with me and only has a couple of sessions at nursery a week. Consequently he is less streetwise than many of the other children. I suppose when we have playdates I could put it away, but I can see him being so pleased with it that he tells everyone at nursery.

He is already a bit the odd one out because he is quite sensitive and quiet. I don't want to give them any other reason to consider him different. Sad that I have to think this I suppose.

Wibu to not get him this?

Jux Tue 05-Mar-13 00:01:28

When dd was that age it wasn't necessarily the older 'streetwise' children who were mean and used terms like 'loser' etc, it was the ones with older siblings. The nursery were very active in getting the children to be nice and kind and on the whole it worked well. Does he have to go now? I mean, do you work so that he has to? Or could you just have him at home until he starts at a better place?

AnneTwacky Tue 05-Mar-13 06:27:36

Get him the train. DD is obsessed with My Little Pony but also loves Ben 10 and Batman. They like what they like and that's fine.

Besides doesn't MLP have a cult male following anyway or did I just dream that.

OwllwOOwllwO Tue 05-Mar-13 06:41:39

My DS is almost 10 and collects them Monster High dolls. He doesn't pull their limbs off etc, he sits in his room and brushes their hair shock In fact I don't think he plays with his 'boy' toys. He's never been picked at school, after school or scouts.
He is currently growing his hair long. grinwink

TantrumsAndBalloons Tue 05-Mar-13 06:42:16

My DS1 aged 3 loved anything pink. His FAVOURITE toy was a doll and pram. He had sparkly clothes. At age 5 his school bag was a pink glittery affair.
We had a little chat about the bag, and he said "but mum, you always told me that we don't all have to be the same and like the same things. So I like pink, not power rangers"

We lived in..well lets say not the nicest part of North London.
My ds1 carried that bag, along with a pink lunchbox and my little pony flask for over a year.
Nothing anyone said about it bothered him.

Oh and he is 14 now. Dresses entirely in hollister/addidas and wouldn't be seen with any other bag but his addidas messenger.
Plays football. But also is a "rising star" (his words) in the drama club.

Carrying a pink bag, pushing a dolly in a pram and wearing glittery trainers hasn't had a detrimental effect on him, 11 years later grin

exoticfruits Tue 05-Mar-13 07:24:07

I thought this was a joke thread! It seems pointless having the system if he doesn't have choice- -and I can't understand how you explain that he can't have it when there isn't a logical explanation.

Sokmonsta Tue 05-Mar-13 07:40:41

I'm glad you've ordered him the toy he wants.

I think it's very easy to say as a parent to 2 girls and 2 girls to not worry about what the dc play with (ds is running around with a sparkly wand, dd is playing cars). But when you have only one gender it's very easy to fall into the stereotype toys, and also harder to explain away as the dc get older and have friends over who may not have such toys themselves.

NewAtThisMalarky Tue 05-Mar-13 08:09:09

There's a bit of a my little pony subculture going on at the moment - my teenage daughter is into them, and there are quite a few teenage boys into them too - there's a lot of 'brony' t-shirts out there, which is the name for a male fan. The girls are called pegasisters.

He'll be the coolest kid in school (they just might not realise it)!

Sianilaa Tue 05-Mar-13 08:15:51

I'd let him have it. My 3.5 yr old DS loves anything pink and sparkly and I love that he is too little to bow to gender stereotyping.

I'm completely shocked at the description of other 3 year old boys who are violent and use bad language. My two (5 and 3.5) still think "stupid" is the height of rudeness!

Sianilaa Tue 05-Mar-13 08:16:35

Oh and I did just buy a MLP for DS2 actually. He loves it!

JamieandtheMagicTorch Tue 05-Mar-13 17:03:44


Good post, spot on. I think we are all prone to projection


Yes, I think you are right about those with older siblings.

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