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To use my title

(319 Posts)
ArtemisatBrauron Sun 03-Mar-13 09:35:15

I have a PhD and use my title - I was thinking of just using it at work but decided consistency was best and changed it with the bank etc as well. I've recently had several snide comments about it as well as a few family members and work colleagues who continue to address me/write to me as Mrs Brauron. I haven't corrected them because it seems rude, but it annoys me - AIBU?

Yjossarian Tue 12-Mar-13 00:38:54

I don't mind if people do/don't call me by my title; the only thing I'm a bit hmm about is that I work with a man who is also a D.Phil and everyone calls him Dr. I'm just Yjossarian...guess they don't think I'm smart enough for the title!

aurynne Tue 12-Mar-13 00:56:08

Miss, Mrs, Mrs and Mr are social titles.

Dr, MD, DPhil, MS... are professional titles.

To expect your family to address you by your professional title is indeed quite pretentious. Why in hell would anyone not professionally-related to you care whether or not you have a PhD? And why would they be expected to address that irrelevant fact?

By the way, I have a PhD too and the possibility of asking family and friends to address me as "Dr" in writing hadn't even occurred to me. Still doesn't.

LRDtheFeministDragon Tue 12-Mar-13 01:03:51

DPhil isn't a title at all. Someone who has a DPhil or an MD has the title of 'Dr'.

ComposHat Tue 12-Mar-13 01:12:12

Actually sod it, I am going down the Idi Amin route I will henceforth be known as:

"His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Compos Hat VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Seas and Conqueror of the British Empire in Scotland in General and Leith in Particular"

LRDtheFeministDragon Tue 12-Mar-13 01:16:02

That's nice ... especially the 'Leith in Particular' ... but I prefer to be Stormageddon, Destroyer of Worlds. I'll get it registered.

Monty27 Tue 12-Mar-13 01:16:45

Oh please OP, I'm a qualified prick but I don't call myself it grin

You really are a dick though.

I'm always wondering what exestionalism is really about?

Just asking. confused

ComposHat Tue 12-Mar-13 02:07:14

Yes 'stormageddon, destroyer of worlds' will look lovely on an office door somewhere.

I would also be tempted to change my surname by deed poll to 'Feelgood' 'and the Medics' or 'gimmiethenewsIgottabadcaseoflovingyou' for shits and giggles post-PhD.

louisianablue2000 Wed 13-Mar-13 22:21:42

The other reason I use my title is because I didn't change my name when I got married. So Miss Blue isn't right because I'm married and Mrs Blue isn't right because that's my Mum. So it's either Ms or Dr.

GrendelsMum Wed 13-Mar-13 22:26:52

Whenever I have to add someone to our database and don't know if they're male or female, I put them down as 'Dr'.

MumVsKids Wed 13-Mar-13 22:47:16

I have a title and I use it smile

I inherited it when I married DH. He is a laird, and when we married, I became a lady hmm

All of my official documents hold my title, as does my bank card etc.

I like it!!

Stopsittingonyoursister Wed 13-Mar-13 22:52:48

My MIL expects us all to send cards etc to her and use "Dr" on the envelope etc. She introduces herself to all and sundry as "Dr". I find it saves people getting us mixed up - she is Dr X and I am Mrs X.

She is a bit odd though...

cory Wed 13-Mar-13 23:04:39

I wouldn't expect an aunt even to remember to address me as Mrs, let alone doctor. I'm happy if they can remember my name. My students call me by my first name. I do have Dr on my office door though- just in case some of my colleagues need reminding...

INeverSaidThat Wed 13-Mar-13 23:33:37

I think inherited titles are very confused I would never use one. They are antiquated and pompous. I can't see any good reason to use one.


Earned titles are perfectly ok though smile

ComposHat Wed 13-Mar-13 23:58:21


Most humbled me lady.

Frantically tugs forelock.

An actual Laird or one of those send off a tenner and you can be a Lairds?

So are you 'The much honoured Mumsvskids' ?

MumVsKids Thu 14-Mar-13 21:57:18

DH is an actual laird, and I inherited the title of lady when I married him.

I do use it on my driving licence and passport etc, but it's more just because I can. I'd be mortified If someone actually called me Lady MumVsKids for real!!


FWIW I totally agree about inherited titles being a bit pompous!! DH egged me on to use it and I did!! It is all a bit of a laugh to be honest, and though we are he is a Scottish landowner, we live in the midlands in a 3 bed semi because the opportunities for work are few and far between in the highlands!

One day I may actually be lady of the manor!!! smile

LRDtheFeministDragon Thu 14-Mar-13 22:05:53

Wow. Now that is pretty cool.

Do you still jump if people call you 'Lady MumVsKids'?

I think you should definitely get the smallest and most down-at-heel flat you can find and call yourself the 'Lady of 2b, Shitington View Houses'. grin

GreenEggsAndNichts Thu 14-Mar-13 22:13:27

pff I'd totally use Lady if it were my title. All the time. wink

Anyway, DH has a Dr and uses it in his professional capacity (academia) but I would fall about laughing if he expected family and friends to address him as Dr Nichts on personal cards and parcels.

Even my in-laws don't expect that (also both Drs) and they're German (they love a good title, Germans).

GrendelsMum Thu 14-Mar-13 22:31:23

There was a name plate I saw every time I went for a supervision in college for someone called "Prof Sir Sam Smith" - I alwas wondered whether he insisted on being called 'Prof Sir Sam' at all times. (Apparently not, and the person I eventually asked didn't think it was funny, either).

INeverSaidThat Thu 14-Mar-13 22:35:27

MumVsKids fair enough wink smile

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