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To think my friend is an idiot ?

(30 Posts)
Inseywinseyupthespout Sun 17-Feb-13 13:08:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SirBoobAlot Sun 17-Feb-13 13:11:36

No, YANBU. She is an idiot. I'd be telling her the risks, again, and saying that you wouldn't feel comfortable getting a lift with her again after seeing the way her children were position in their seats.

Feminine Sun 17-Feb-13 13:12:50


Are the children massive?

I guess she thinks they will be safe.

YANBU as I wouldn't do it either wink

You might be called all shades of shit for calling her an idiot here though!

Inseywinseyupthespout Sun 17-Feb-13 13:16:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pobblewhohasnotoes Sun 17-Feb-13 13:17:28

Babies should be rear facing as long as possible. I certainly wouldn't be putting my 7 month old in a ff cat seat. What's the rush??

maddening Sun 17-Feb-13 13:19:04

Yanbu -she is an idiot - does she have constraints eg financial that are affecting her choices?

Inseywinseyupthespout Sun 17-Feb-13 13:21:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GregBishopsBottomBitch Sun 17-Feb-13 13:22:44

My DD is 5 and i've just starting thinking she only needs a booster seat now, your friend is a idiot and being dangerous.

Pandemoniaa Sun 17-Feb-13 15:31:35

I've never understood this desire to rush children into the wrong car seats. It's unsafe and an incredibly irresponsible way to try and make them more grown up than they are. At 2 1/2 I can't imagine your friend's dd being old enough for a booster seat since she's clearly not behaving safely in it.

Admittedly, I thought it was 4 years old or a certain weight/height since I honestly can't see my very tall 2.2 year old dgd fitting into her harnessed seat until she is 4. But that's not the same as hurrying to replace a safer alternative that hasn't been grown out of because surely you keep them in the correct seat for as long as possible?

Very silly behaviour and I'm astonished she can't see the very real dangers that are presented by what seems like a ludicrous decision.

PeggyCarter Sun 17-Feb-13 15:42:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

babiesinslingsgetcoveredinfood Sun 17-Feb-13 15:54:57

It's a bit odd, but then I think it's odd that the law here doesn't require rear facing for longer as in other Northern European countries. We moved from maxi cosi to be safe izi so dd remained rear facing.

My dd has just turned 3 & moved into a high back booster as she was too heavy for her be safe rear facing group 1. She is on the 98th centime. Ds moved into the be safe at 10 months.

If the children are within the weight limits its not the end of the world & you won't change her mind, so try not to be too cat bum mouth.

Mrspartacus Sun 17-Feb-13 15:58:28

I've only ever been car seat police with my own children, and children in my care when driving.

MyGlassIsJustHalfWet Sun 17-Feb-13 16:01:19

Unless the 7 month old is massive it should still be rear facing. Im sure I've heard it's illegal unless they're at least 20lbs? Even if it's not, it's not a risk id be taking.

babiesinslingsgetcoveredinfood Sun 17-Feb-13 16:34:56


Then the 50th centime for a girl at end of 7th month is 17lbs. So it is feasible that she is heavy enough. My ds is on the 75th centime for weight, but looks tiny. He's one of those kids who you expect to be much lighter when you pick him up.

So not a million miles away, or even spot on, so if I were you I'd unhook your judgey wedgey (sp? Funnily enough, neither in the apple dictionary)

So turns out YAB a little U

PrettyKitty1986 Sun 17-Feb-13 16:45:14

I think yabu really. The older one is in the weight range for the high back booster and unless they're tiny, the 7 month old will be within the weight range for the harnessed seat. Not breaking any laws.

My friend is one of those that gets on her high horse about car seats. She is disproportionately proud of the fact that both her ds's are still in rear facing seats at 1 and 3 and will go on and on about how I should reconsider the seats I use for my 5 and 2 year olds.
It takes all of my willpower not to point out to her that the ten year old heap of shit car she drives would fold like a cardboard box if anything drove into it, making her expensive car seats pretty pointless really.

Trazzletoes Sun 17-Feb-13 16:52:54

If they are within the weight limits then what's the problem?

FWIW, my DS was in his booster before he was 2.5. If rather he had stayed in his old car seat but his head stuck out the top and the shoulder straps didn't fit. I know she said her DCs hadn't grown out of their old seats.

She perhaps needs to do a bit more work on getting her DD to sit properly in the seat though.

Inseywinseyupthespout Sun 17-Feb-13 18:47:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dayshiftdoris Sun 17-Feb-13 21:21:59

It takes all of my willpower not to point out to her that the ten year old heap of shit car she drives would fold like a cardboard box if anything drove into it, making her expensive car seats pretty pointless really

Some of us can't afford to drive anything else but continue to offer our children the best possible protection in the event of a crash.

For what it's worth... we had an accident 4yrs ago in an 8yr old car and my son's high back booster saved him from serious injury or death according to the police.

As long as the car seat is suitable for the WEIGHT (not age) of the child I dont care so PrettyKitty YABU and frankly a bit nasty whilst the OP YANBU but there is little you can do...

bedmonster Sun 17-Feb-13 22:38:30

This is interesting. DP and I were discussing it tonight.
DS 15m is 15kg exactly (this seems pretty heavy to me?). We have a forward facing car seat in my car which he has been in since about 8 months old. He didn't physically fit in the rear facing baby seat anymore - head fell backwards out the top. He was younger than recommended but quite clear that he wasn't safe in it anymore. He was well within the weight guidelines.
I think DS is very young to be even thinking about a ff booster with back type thing, have no idea what their technical name is, but he is, according to the guidelines, heavy enough. Not sure what to do about buying another car seat to go in DPs car.
Will keep my eye on this thread.

Trazzletoes Sun 17-Feb-13 22:50:13

bed wow! Er, yes, that's, erm, quite heavy <tries to be diplomatic> grin

My DS is very tall and consequently pretty heavy. He was just over 15kg at his 2 year review. Though when I asked the HV about car seats before she weighed him she laughed and said it was nothing to worry about because no way was he anywhere near 15kg grin

If he still fits in the one you have, keep him in it as long as you can.

WhichIsBest Sun 17-Feb-13 22:54:08

DD is almost 5 years old and is 16kg.

aldiwhore Sun 17-Feb-13 22:55:45

My car is 15 years and perfectly safe ... just saying.

You're not wrong op but her (legal) idea of safety and yours are different, that doesn't necessarily make her an idiot.

Goldmandra Sun 17-Feb-13 23:02:08

Please correct me if I am wrong but isn't the forward/rear facing issue more about the proportion of head size to body size than the weight of the child? I thought we placed babies rear facing because their neck muscles needed more help to manage the weight of the head in an impact.

I can't imagine that being heavier makes a difference to the baby's ability to support its own head in an impact.

Maybe I am wrong and it's nothing to do with head size confused

MumVsKids Sun 17-Feb-13 23:03:02

"It takes all of my willpower not to point out to her that the ten year old heap of shit car she drives would fold like a cardboard box if anything drove into it, making her expensive car seats pretty pointless really"...

I'd love you to see all three of my DCs in our 30 year old "heap of shit" PrettyKitty I'd also lay bets it'd survive a head on collision more successfully than anything you might be driving.

Age of motor is irrelevant.

You feel safer in a £5k (eg) "new car" than a £30k (eg, new book price) older car???


bedmonster Sun 17-Feb-13 23:03:43

I know Trazzle I know!! grin he's a big lad. He's really solid, 94cm tall too (the only reason I know his particular stats is because we weighed him today at the pharmacy so we could sort out car seats)

Which Can I ask if your DD is particularly slight or do you think she is fairly averagely sized among her peers? My own DDs are older, and I don't know how much they weigh!

I'm still not sure what to do about the bloody car seats!

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