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to think that it is poor behaviour if children/teenagers play on their phones for 100% of the time at a meal out?

(151 Posts)
FlouncingMintyy Sat 16-Feb-13 19:54:26

Bit of a reunion with old friends today. We are scattered far and wide so don't see each other all that often and have lots of children between us ages ranging from 8 to 14, who don't know each other particularly well but have certainly met before and seen each other from time to time.

There were more than 25 of us and the only way we could configure it in the restaurant was for the 8 children to sit on a table nearby.

Aibu to be really unimpressed that 3 of these kids simply played on their phones for the entire meal and made no effort to interact with the others?

My dd said that one boy (younger than her) literally did not speak at all.

GloriaPritchett Sat 16-Feb-13 19:56:10

I normally would say YANBU, and I wouldn't be happy if it were my DC, but did they know one another? I wouldn't like to sit with 8 people I didn't know either.

TWinklyLittleStar Sat 16-Feb-13 19:58:23

YABU in these circumstances, 14 year olds do not want to get to know 8 year old.strangers. Presumably they left you and your friends eating in peace to have fun rather than whining and complaining about being bored.

HollyBerryBush Sat 16-Feb-13 19:59:55

They are being dragged out to a lunch where their parents are friends - utterly boring and Im impressed that anyone got a 14yo to go anywhere with a load of adults and little kids. Let alone parking them on a table by themselves.

ChaosTrulyReigns Sat 16-Feb-13 20:00:25


But I fear that this is the future.

Pagwatch Sat 16-Feb-13 20:02:56

I am a fucking dinosaur.
DCs not allowed phones or gizmos at the table. Even DS1 aged 19.

They can be bored for a couple of hours. It won't kill them.

Pagwatch Sat 16-Feb-13 20:03:24

I mean to say YANBU

catgirl1976 Sat 16-Feb-13 20:04:02


It is incredibly rude and the fact they didn't know each other is no excuse.

But I see adults doing this too

It's horrendous, but like Chaos I think it is sadly the future sad

StarlightMcKenzie Sat 16-Feb-13 20:05:09

Well YANBU except that Ds has autism, and if that is the future of social interaction then yay for him!!!!

Pagwatch Sat 16-Feb-13 20:06:13

Star. Ds2 isn't allowed either.
Bored schmored.


badguider Sat 16-Feb-13 20:07:09

It's a horrible situation to put them together like that when they're not family and are at such an awkward age and when there's such a difference between an 8 yr old and 14yr old.

I think there is no way in which one table of 17 and one of 8 is fair - i'd have made three tables of around 8 and mixed the kids in. It was very unfair of the adults to arrange it how they did.

kim147 Sat 16-Feb-13 20:07:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cozietoesie Sat 16-Feb-13 20:10:22

I was going round a notable local graveyard some months back with a group led by an enthusiast. Guess what the teenagers in the group were doing?

What concerns me more than anything is that they no longer read. Books etc/

StarlightMcKenzie Sat 16-Feb-13 20:11:42

Oh no. Ds isn't allowed. But I just think that the reduced demands for conversation and eye contact is a positive for him even I he doesn't have a gadget of his own.

catgirl1976 Sat 16-Feb-13 20:14:46

They might be reading on Kindles cozie

But still rude. Even if they are

DS is only 1 but he won't be allowed. Although by the time he's a teen people will probably have microchips grafted to their heads

<shuffles off like old gimmer>

EuroShopperEnergyDrink Sat 16-Feb-13 20:14:49

YABU to park young adults on a table with 8 year olds and expect them to be mates and engage. How bloody patronising. I'd have sat and played on my phone and texted my mates too.

Perhaps get allow them to join your group next time and get in on your conversation rather than designating a kiddy table.

EuroShopperEnergyDrink Sat 16-Feb-13 20:16:52

(I think phones at the table are unacceptable FYI- but I can see why teenagers would be stroppy and texting and facebooking if mum and dad had dragged them out and shoved them on a table with a load of kids- if you cared so much about conversation and socialising you would have had them sat amongst you!)

FlouncingMintyy Sat 16-Feb-13 20:20:20

But the whole reason we were together is to see our adult friends who we don't see very often. The children were 14, 12, 12, 12, 12, 10, 10 and 8. The person who proposed and organised this get together is someone who doesn't live where most of the rest of us do but was very definitely the host. It was her two children and one of the other 12 year olds who spent their time entirely on the phone. All the rest of them managed to socialise.

Pagwatch Sat 16-Feb-13 20:20:43

Sorry Starlight. I did get what you meant. It was just a lame joshing. Sorry.

FlouncingMintyy Sat 16-Feb-13 20:23:53

I think once in a while it is ok to ask children - heavens even 14 year olds! shock - to accommodate the preferences of the adults.

Smudging Sat 16-Feb-13 20:25:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Smudging Sat 16-Feb-13 20:26:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cozietoesie Sat 16-Feb-13 20:28:01

They don't read catgirl. Sorry.

FlouncingMintyy Sat 16-Feb-13 20:31:02

I'm quietly amazed that the two parents concerned didn't tell them to just get off their bloody phones. Parents who are scared of saying no to their kids, or just oblivious to how awful it looks?

GogoGobo Sat 16-Feb-13 20:32:15

YANBU. Good learning experience missed for the older ones to "host" the younger ones and socialise with strangers! What will they do in the real world when they have to rub along with randoms!

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