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To be annoyed that DP stayed at the pub all night whilst I was ill

(18 Posts)
Peteypan Sat 16-Feb-13 00:56:12

So DP and I have been together around 6 months. He was due to go to the pub tonight with mates. I was invited but he said it would just be the guys and I'd e bored, then I found out that he'd invited a number of his women friends but lied about it.

Anyway I've been ill all week and around ten started throwing up none stop. I text him to let him know and he simply replied hope you're ok. AIBU to be a little pissed off about this?

anonymosity Sat 16-Feb-13 00:58:04

I'd question the use of "DP" for someone you've been with 6 months. Surely he's a "BF"?
If you're well enough to type you're ok. go to sleep and go out next time / tomorrow.

WorraLiberty Sat 16-Feb-13 01:01:34

He lied to you about inviting women friends and put you off coming out with him?

And you're upset because he didn't rush round to your house when you threw up?

I think you've got your priorities wrong here...

Bogeyface Sat 16-Feb-13 01:03:30

If your not living together then it isnt really up to him to look after you, so YABU to expect that. You are also being U to miss the main point!

He lied to you about it being boys only, and said that you would be bored to stop you going along after his half assed invitation. That is the main problem and that proves him as a liar and a twat.

Dump him for that, not the sickness thing.

Bogeyface Sat 16-Feb-13 01:04:22

Anon I get norovirus v v badly (was hospitalised from it a few years back) and yes there are periods where you are very ill but are bored senseless and can type on a phone or a laptop.

TurnipCake Sat 16-Feb-13 01:05:06

God, he sounds just like my ex. Very convenient that he decides you would be bored around 'the guys'. Sorry to hear you're unwell.

SashaSashays Sat 16-Feb-13 01:08:05

Considering you've only been together for a short while and it was pre-planned as well as you being all week, I think he wasn't unreasonable.

Yes it would have been a nice gesture for him to come and see you (am assuming this is what you wanted) but he did give you the opportunity to say you weren't when he sent that text. Unless you specifically asked him and he said no or had ignored you completely I think his behaviour was fine.

I think you're justified in feeling maybe a bit disappointed or miffed but it wouldn't be something I'd mention or make a fuss over.

However I would be curious as to why he was lying about who would be at the pub. Sounds like just an excuse because he didn't want you there. I suppose maybe he wanted to spend time with his mates without you, did you ask him?

nenevomito Sat 16-Feb-13 01:08:14

DH is shit when I'm ill. I'd be massively pissed off with him lying to me.

Your bf didn't want you to go out with him and lied about the reason why. Be pissed off at that more and just a wee bit irked at the sickness thing.

TBH no-one is good company when sick.

WorraLiberty Sat 16-Feb-13 01:10:30

Out of interest, how did you find out that he'd actually invited these women and lied about it?

Who told you?

maddening Sat 16-Feb-13 01:40:27

I'd be suspicious of trying to ensure you weren't there then inviting a number of women friends and lying about it.

The lack of concern for you would seal he deal for me.

Peteypan Sat 16-Feb-13 01:51:12

I had his iPad and a message reply came up on the screen

ENormaSnob Sat 16-Feb-13 08:42:53

I wouldn't expect a bf of six months to rush to my bedside because I was vomiting.

I would however, dump him over the lying issue.

WhatsTheBuzz Sat 16-Feb-13 08:55:54

agree that the lying would ring alarm bells for me.

BlackholesAndRevelations Sat 16-Feb-13 08:56:25

Would you really want a bf of six months to be there while you puked? I wouldn't! hmm

However I agree with others about the lying being the issue. Doesn't look like a keeper to me, sorry.

ZillionChocolate Sat 16-Feb-13 08:58:50

I don't see how there's much he could have done for you. Potentially I'd have wanted him to keep clear to avoid catching whatever'd made you ill.

The lying is a problem. Sort it out when you're feeling better.

akaemmafrost Sat 16-Feb-13 09:14:46

He doesn't want you there when he goes out?


HecateWhoopass Sat 16-Feb-13 09:40:16

Why did he choose to lie to you? That's the big issue.

you've only been dating him 6 months, if he's lying to you then you have to ask yourself if it's worth it.

I wouldn't bother about the ill thing. You're a big girl, what can he do? Just wrap up and ride it out.

But I would want to know why he went to such lengths to keep me away.

QuacksForDoughnuts Sat 16-Feb-13 11:29:35

After six months it is touch and go whether you're at the stage of handholding during norovirus. It's also fine for each person to want a bit of time with their own friends. (It's also between the people concerned whether they use the term 'partner', imo, don't know why so many people get a bug up their arse about that.) But YANBU to be upset about the lying, that's a massive red flag. If it was all totally innocent then why ever wouldn't he want you to know who was there?

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