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To think you should give a friend a lift home if it's raining?

(337 Posts)
eggsy11 Fri 08-Feb-13 12:33:34

This may be more a chat thing, but think I need the harshness of AIBU to see if I do have the right to be mad at my friend!

Have done A LOT of favours for this friend, but won't include that in the argument since I didn't do them to be paid back... but it is what is annoying me about the situation.

Another mum at DS's nursery saw me and DS huddling under the doorway until the hail past. Said hello, grabbed her DS and drove home. DS was screaming because he was scared. He was under his raincover in the pram, and it was a 15 minute walk so it was only me that got wet. But it was still horrible and I was literally soaked to the skin.

I know the mum would of had to drop us home (5 min drive) and come back for her DS, as there was only 1 car seat. But there is no way i'd walk past my friend like that! She is always early to pick up her DS so it wouldn't of been an issue since it's daycare, not like at school.

Am I being unfair? Is it our fault we don't have a car? I just think it would of been nice!

(btw she wasn't in a rush. pictures on facebook of them cuddled up watching cbeebies etc when they got home!)

SavoyCabbage Fri 08-Feb-13 12:34:55

Where would she have left her own child?

Whoknowswhocares Fri 08-Feb-13 12:35:48

Yabu. Very.

She would have had to leave her DS to take you home? What parent is going to do that????

Isildur Fri 08-Feb-13 12:35:57

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

eggsy11 Fri 08-Feb-13 12:35:59

in nursery for an extra five or ten minutes! daycare nursery, no specific time for pick up at ours. pay by the day and there was a good 2 hours left!

Trills Fri 08-Feb-13 12:36:37

It would have been nice if she had.

But there is no should have about it.

As you said, she only has one car seat. She might be early by your standards but in her head she has arrived to pick up her DS so she needs to take him, so there is no room for another child.

It probably just didn't occur to her.

Sugarice Fri 08-Feb-13 12:37:42

Are you talking about two different friends here or the same woman, I'm confused.

diddl Fri 08-Feb-13 12:38:03


Look, it would have been nice, but it didn´t happen!

Maybe she realised she couldn´t fit you in??

Thumbwitch Fri 08-Feb-13 12:38:06

Yes YABU, sorry. It would have been lovely of her to have done that for you but frankly, I can't see that many people would have.

funnypeculiar Fri 08-Feb-13 12:38:23

Where did you want her to leave her ds? Think that makes all the difference...
(PS Sorry you had a horrid walk home, as someone who's just got a car I know how miserable it can be)

Floggingmolly Fri 08-Feb-13 12:38:26

If there were two hours of nursery still available, why were you taking your child home in a storm when he was so scared he was screaming?????

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack Fri 08-Feb-13 12:38:38

Actually YABU.....she didn't have enough car seats so she probably didn't give it a thought and if your child is taking up her sons seat where is she going to leave him.

You are being unfair and it isn't her fault that you don't have a car either....maybe she had somewhere to be.......there are going to be millions of times you get caught in the rain. Mother Nature has a funny way of making it rain at school run time so just get used to it, people aren't going to offer you lifts every single time and you cant go getting annoyed when they don't.

HollyBerryBush Fri 08-Feb-13 12:39:13

Too many 'perhaps' in that - from one car seat, to having a boot full of crap (like mine) that couldnt accommodate a buggy, to running her car on petrol fumes and unable to fill it up thus unable to make extra trips, to not wanting to leave her child at nursery whilst she plyed taxi.

eggsy11 Fri 08-Feb-13 12:39:22

maybe it's because of all the times she asks me to do stuff for her.... if it was a randomer then I wouldn't of expected it.

funnypeculiar Fri 08-Feb-13 12:40:27

So, you wanted her to go back into the nursery and put her ds back in (cue melt down from her ds) and then come and sort you out? Hummm, not sure I'm that thoughtful when rushing home ... Could you not have gone back inside the nursery to wait for 15 mins for the worst of the hail to die down?
<caveat, I am nice normally, honest>

SPBInDisguise Fri 08-Feb-13 12:40:30

good question flogging - why didn't you just wait until it had passed?

Sugarice Fri 08-Feb-13 12:41:48

I don't drive and when I used to pick ds3 in his buggy we walked home whilst his friends were driven.

It didn't occur to me to get pissy about not being offered a lift, that's life when you don't drive.

NothingIsAsBadAsItSeems Fri 08-Feb-13 12:42:21

YABU if you expected her to drive you home and then go back for her ds

Feminine Fri 08-Feb-13 12:42:33

I'm wondering the same as flogg smile

It would have been nice. You need to remember that just because you are the kind of person who would do it, others are a little more self centered/don't even notice. They are not bad, but have different agendas.

I was 8 months pregnant , my 'friend' dropped me at the bus stop because she didn't want to get stuck in traffic!

eggsy11 Fri 08-Feb-13 12:43:22

She hadn't picked her ds up yet. She was on the way in. Did you ACTUALLY read my post? funnypeculiar

We waited ten mins and then left because DS was getting so upset.

Lorelailovesluke Fri 08-Feb-13 12:43:23

Who else's fault would it be that you don't have a car?

littlewhitebag Fri 08-Feb-13 12:43:45

You had a pram and no car seat. She probably didn't even give it a thought.

KeepingCalmAndPostingNicely Fri 08-Feb-13 12:44:09

Surely if you had just waited inside this wouldn't have been an issue at all. YABU

CloudsAndTrees Fri 08-Feb-13 12:44:14

She would have had to leave her own child to do it?

You are being Very Very unreasonable!

Surely you know that as someone who choses to walk to nursery then you are going to get rained on sometimes!

Why didn't you just wait inside yourself for a bit longer.

eggsy11 Fri 08-Feb-13 12:44:50

Okay i'm just going to be a fucking bitch from now on. I would never leave one of my friends with her child walking home in the rain!

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